Okay guys I gotta question.... Everyone has told me that if I constantly “baby” my mother she will…

It’s a hard situation and I have a mom that acts toxic too. Sometimes you do just have to let them deal with their stuff in their own. You’ve been helping her for so long that it seems now she is just taking advantage of you. She just knows she has to just act out and then she’ll get her way. It’s so tough when it’s your mom acting like the childish one. Since she has a full time job then she should be able to cover her own bills if she budgets. Or if she needs help I know the Salvation Army often helps people pay for their bills or helps in other ways. Good luck mama. You gotta do what’s best for you, your husband and especially those kids.

Your mom is being really unfair to you. You’ve tried to help her and she seems to be acting like a brat. Don’t feel guilty. I understand feeling guilty but your children need to come first, especially with how far along you are. Don’t take on your mothers stress. Also, I’m sorry she’s being verbally abuse to you in front of your children or at all. I’m sure you’ve done nothing to warrant that.

You don’t need that stress on you right now with being this far along in your pregnancy and I agree she needs to grow up and figure it out for herself. My mother is somewhat the same as well nothing I ever do is good enough and I’m always wrong so I know how it feels. Keep your head up and it sounds like you have a great man beside you!

Thanks guys.. so much. I’m glad I’m not the only one who has to deal with s mother this way.. I just can’t ever imagine being this way toward my babies!

Your mom is most defiantly taking advantage of you hun, don't let her, what your doing is right. She will accept it, hopefully.

Tough love. The same as a parent raising a child. At one point little birdy has to jump from the tree and fly and they can't do it when they are relying on someone else. It's a form of extreme co-dependency and YES it will interfere with your marriage, your finances, etc., if it continues.

You have to sit her down (your husband too! He has to be there and support it!) And tell her its time to either support herself or find a roommate or boyfriend that will. You do not have to support her. Don't be a softie and let her slide because that is what codependant people want. They manipulate you and play up the neediness and there you are again. Be firm. Give her 30 days. If she fails to support herself then she may need to go into some type of therapy or group home.

Your mom sounds manipulative and like she has characteristics of borderline personality disorder. You should probably learn now that no matter how much you do or your husband does for her you will always be ungrateful and not doing enough. It is definitely time to let her figure that stuff out on her own and learn to ignore the guilt trips that will definitely follow. My last foster mom was like that and I am glad she is not in my life anymore but I understand why you may not want to go that far just have very strict boundaries and consequences for her crossing them.

No your not wrong at all, she should be pretty capable of paying her bills if she has a full time job. It sounds like she’s taking advantage of the situation!

You don’t owe her anything and it sounds as if she’s using you. Therefore she could figure out her bills and buy her own tires. Don’t keep enabling her especially if you can’t depend on her

It is not fair to you or your family to expect you to support your mom on top of that. She is a grown woman and needs to figure out her own life. Do not let her try to guilt you. It is not your responsibility to take care of her

Your not wrong at all with your husbands name on it and it keeps getting shut off will effect him not her I don’t blame your husband you guys try and help her and she is just being selfish and rude your kids come first not her she is an adult with a full time job she should be able to support herself by herself time for her to stop spending money on stuff she doesn’t need and focus more on her bills. Demanding you to buy her stuff is rude as hell especially when she is telling you not to buy your kids stuff they need and than she won’t even help you or borrow you money if you need help it’s time to push her out the nest and let her fly on her own your her child not her mother sorry didn’t mean to sound rude if I did

Yeah it’s going to affect your husbands credit rating if it keeps getting shut off in his name.

You’re not wrong. She’s an adult and should be taking care of her self. Family is always around to help in emergencies but it sounds like she isn’t financially responsible. Stop footing her bill.

Heck no girl. Time for her to put her big girl panties on. Cut it off. She will figure it out. That's not healthy for anyone involved. You're doing the right thing.