I want some advice my bd left me at 4 months pregnant for a hood rat found out she wasn't what he really wanted and been…

Me personally when I cut ties that's it. Don't make someone else a priority when you are only an option. Ask your self did he care enough about your mental state or well being at 4 months when he decided to walk away. I'm 36 now and have no tolerance for bull$hit. If you let him stay he's gonna think he can pop in and out whenever he wants and please believe me you don't want that. Tell him no and mean it. I promise he will respect you more.

Hell no!

@hct291997, he’ll naw don’t feel bad it his fault not yours made dat choose to go hoe hoping

@mommy2bemo thank you I feel a lot better know someone feel the same I do u started feeling bad like I was actually in the wrong

You got to do what best for you and your daughter and dam whoever told you was wrong for not letting him stay at your house tell him to go to hell and fuck off and go to the hotel

@haslberry thank you

I definitely wouldn't let him stay while in town. I wouldn't doubt that if you did he'd try getting in your pants which would put you and baby at risk for who knows what.

I also wouldn't worry about his empty threats. I doubt he'll take the initiative to get full custody, and if you're a fit parent there's no way a judge would grant that.

@nomli ok thank you she's due I'm least then 3 months so i guess I need to get on it

I'm not exactly sure, but I assume that if he doesn't show then the court will have no problem granting you full custody without visitation. Maybe find a lawyer who does free consultations. See what the outcomes could be if you decide not to put him on the birth certificate (would he force a paternity test? A friend did that, left the "father" blank, and the father of her child hasn't reached out in 8 years. She didn't want him to have any rights and rightly assumed he wouldn't care.)

@nomli doesn't he have to be at court for that?

I'm so sorry you're going through this. But I totally agree, don't give him another chance. He didn't care then, he won't care now. I know this isn't what you asked but: When the baby is born, go to court yourself to get a custody arrangement. There's no way he can get full custody, because it always goes to the mother unless it's proven that she's unfit. But get custody settled so he can't just take the baby without the law chasing him, and try to get only supervised visits at that. He is the father, so in a way he does have some rights until you go to court and get a plan made. Then no one can say you're keeping him away. But from this, he seems like the type of dad who won't even bother to show up, and at least you'll have proof that you 'tried'.

@hct291997 no problem..that's what I'm here for. Take care!!

@hct291997, honey always I’m 19 and nobody can tell me what & how to live my life. Don’t worry you got this

@takesma thank you so much

@hct291997 It's normal...we can't help who we love but we just have to be mindful that people treat us however we let them. I've been through this situation a time or two. But I eventually realized that I deserve respect as well. There is always someone who will love you the way you should be loved. He will realize that it's his lost. One man's garbage is another man's treasure.

@fancydadon I feel because I'm young people try to dictate how I'm suppose to live what I'm suppose to do I'm my life and the 1st time I say anything about my life I'm wrong

@jessig2006 your right but his family and close associates told me he's he father I don't get it he LEFT US why should I care

@hct291997, girl please f*#k him that may not be the best way to say it. But whoever told you were wrong a fool. You’re not wrong you’re entitled to your own feelings. Honey pls, if anything I would’ve told him & the ppl that were telling you you’re wrong to suck it & buy your child a few diapers or some lol.

@takesma it was hard to say no in the beginning because I thought I loved him but I kept telling myself my daughter and I mean and deserve so much better then him I've been struggling but happier without him but I get neieve sometimes when I talk to him but I'm strong enough not to fall for it. Thank you just never thought I'll be raising her alone

Who the hell told you that you would be wrong? That person is wrong! He can find a different place to stay. You don't need that or him around you and your baby! Especially if he has been bouncing from chick to chick. Last thing you need is him trying to get back with you. No thank you!

Me personally when I cut ties that's it. Don't make someone else a priority when you are only an option. Ask your self did he care enough about your mental state or well being at 4 months when he decided to walk away. I'm 36 now and have no tolerance for bull$hit. If you let him stay he's gonna think he can pop in and out whenever he wants and please believe me you don't want that. Tell him no and mean it. I promise he will respect you more.

@fancydadon just me but 6 hours ago he was posted with some chick I told him I'm happy you moved on but i don't want any parts of it he's threatened to take me to court to try to get full custody but he doesn't have a stable job nor home to keep her I been through hell I wouldn't let him stay I just got tired of hearing I was wrong if i didn't let him stay

When they found out the grass wasn’t greener on the other side they will always try to run back. Me personally I wouldn’t, like honesty for what? Did he mention y’all’s child or just you?

@nicemmcha2015 thank you I honestly needed another opinion I was told I was wrong if I didn't let him stay but he left me even when i was bleeding thought I lost our child he was to busy hoeing to care

Screw him. His ass can stay else where or dont come. Eff that, girl.