So mommas, I’m kind of in a mental battle with.. myself? I got offered a job today. I already have a…

Getting benefits would be worth it to me. Medical bills add up fast.

@tinyhumansbitch, that’s true. Lol the only thing that made me feel better about the daycare is my mom would have been her teacher after October and it would have been like an early learning type of thing, and she could be with kids her own age. But I already feel guilty because I’m a full time college student and that’s like a full time job in itself.

@glencoco, true. Luckily I haven’t got too sick yet where I’ve had to go to the doctor, but I mean just taking otc medicine and hoping I don’t die isn’t exactly a good “insurance plan” either. Lol

can he also adjust according to your work schedule?

@rndmshtt, I mean we’d be at work at the same time. I think part of his deal is he doesn’t want to be responsible for her at home. I change all the diapers, stay up with her at night, get up when she’s sick, ect..because he works. If I worked it would be an equal partnership and I don’t think he likes that idea.

Insurance is well worth it. My sister only works for the insurance, but she has medical issues that need that coverage. But if working more would actually make you feel better, less crazy, help your sanity, it may be worth it. Lots of mothers work, not to really bring in extra money, but because they need that time, adult interaction, to be a better woman/mother. Kids can do great in daycare. And yeah, they may get sick more, but it'll happen once school starts, too, so might as well get it out of the way now 🤷‍♀️

@nomli, yea I mean working one day a week helped a little bit, but as a waitress, I’m still taking care of needy people. And I may not change dirty diapers, but I do clean the bathrooms, and some days, that’s about the same thing! 😂

@lizabeth.1294, and public bathrooms can be so bad! I'll never understand how adults can leave bathrooms the way they do 🤢

@nomli, right? Sometimes I swear they deliberately miss the toilet.

Girl, who cares if he doesnt like that idea. Takes two to make a baby. He needs to get over his likes and dislikes and do whats best for your little. I was also in a similar situation but we both worked full time ( i dropped down to part time while he worked a different shift so we wouldnt have to deal with a daycare )&’ Before baby i always catered to him and whatever he needs. Which i was happy to do so but once baby came it all became so physically and mentally exhuasting. I think at a certain point i became depressed. I no longer felt like myself. I had to tell him that i couldnt do it all alone. he’s trying to do better which i appreciate. maybe have that sit down with your SO?

@rndmshtt, yea I mean we’d for sure have to do the day care thing with our schedules. But yea, it gets exhausting and I feel like I kind of resent him for getting to just enjoy his time with her. She poops, hands her to me, she wakes up, I wake up, I love the fact that she depends so heavily on me, but sometimes I wish she would want him a little more.I love her to death and I wouldn’t trade her for the world but I also kind of miss being more than Kinlee’s mom/caretaker of our home.

I’m going to say some things that might be controversial...

I’ve never wanted to be a stay at home mom! 😱 That shit is hard work and I just don’t have the patience! I’m not real domestic. 🤷🏼‍♀️

Is it correct you aren’t married? Some people don’t believe in marriage, and that’s fine, but imo, you have to look out for yourself in these situations. There’s nothing to say he couldn’t up and walk away and then where does that leave you? You must take care of yourself and your child when you aren’t married. Take that job and save up! 😉 I’ve read too many stories on these apps of women staying with a guy cause they don’t know how they will support themselves without him (not saying your situation is bad!!).

Anyway, off my soapbox!! Good luck with your decision! May it be the best one for YOU! 🍀

Do it. Your sanity is important. I don't have the mental state to be a stay at home mom for more than a week lol. I'd go crazy.

I wouldn't do it but that doesn't mean you shouldn't. I've tried daycare/working with my son and it never worked out well for us. I'm super tired and I miss him too much. I have insurance though. If I didn't then I'd probably do the job. Plus your child will be in a room with someone he knows that's a bonus!! You do what's best for you.

@cori.severs, yeah my fear is I take it, lose my hours at my job, then hate it or it doesn’t work out. Then I have zero income. My daughter doesn’t really know my mom super well, but she’d ensure my daughter was well taken care of. Just a hard decision. So many pros and cons.

@justgotaname, yeah. I never pictured myself as a stay at home mom. I try to work out or do small things by myself to keep my sanity, but I still don’t get out much without the kids. Luckily if he leaves I have a game plan (hopefully I don’t need one, but better safe than sorry) and make enough money I could support her and myself if nothing else until something better came along. But thank you!! I just hope I make the right one! 🤞🏻

@lizabeth.1294 Maybe if you talk to your current boss and leave on good terms if it doesn't work out, you could go back??It really is a hard decision. I just went through this a few months ago and I ended up leaving my new job after a few weeks bc I didn't like it.

@cori.severs, yea I may talk to him and see what he says. He’s a pretty good dude.