HELP
okay, so my mother in law had asked us a month ago to not tell anyone about he pregnancy yet, and I was already upset about that because I felt like it wasn’t her place to ask that of us, but I love my mother in law, so we did. She said we can after our first ultrasound. We had our first ultrasound done yesterday, and Brandon went to his parents house to break the news to his 15 year old sister, and his mom cried and begged for him to wait another week for her to get back from the beach. (Keep in mind, she’s been to the beach just over a month ago already.) when prompted as to why, she said his 15 year old sister will have an “emotional breakdown” and make herself sick because she “doesn’t think we’re ready.” I don’t know about y’all, but I’m pretty freaking pissed. I see where she’s coming from, seeing as to how Emily (the 15 year old) acted when she found out we were engaged, but I don’t feel like it was her place from the get go to keep it private as if we’re little 16 year old kids. We’re both 22, have our own roof over our heads, pay our own bills, and no one has to care for us. Let me know how you guys would feel about this. PLEASE.
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@1818.whiterabbit she and the sister can have issues by themselves. The mother is enabling her and your husband is not taking a stand for you as his wife. I'd honestly advise you to speak up an say something. I've been in your position as of recently so that why I'm passing this on to you. Don't allow other peoples emotions and motives overshadow your judgment and heart.
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@1818.whiterabbit Good for you girl! Stay strong and don't give up!! 😎
Thank ALL of you. Y’all have made me feel much better about the decision we reached.
@chelleyb93, thank you! Prayers are MUCH appreciated.
@1818.whiterabbit I'm pray all goes well and if it does that's their problem. You worry about your health and the baby.
@wvmommy, I couldn’t agree more with your statement. Their relationship is none of my business, but I’ll be damned if I allow it to affect my husband and my personal life.
@chelleyb93, thank you for your advice. We have plans to go this evening and tell her that we are telling her whether she likes it or not. He went by himself last night, or else I would have already taken care of it. I don’t like people trying to delegate my life. My own daddy doesn’t even try to do that. Why should I allow my mother in law?
Do what y'all want! It's not their right in the slightest to put a timeline on this joy in yours and your husband's life. It's honestly not your problem how they handle it. You have more to deal with now that you are pregnant than adding their nonsense to the mix. As for Emily, it sounds like she is a spoiled brat. If they keep babying her, she is going to spin out of control on them. She sounds immature and having "meltdowns" when she isn't the center of attention. Well, tough! That's life! She needs to learn where she fits in to situations and enabling her isn't helping her. Sounds your MIL needs to cut the umbilical cord.
@1818.whiterabbit she and the sister can have issues by themselves. The mother is enabling her and your husband is not taking a stand for you as his wife. I'd honestly advise you to speak up an say something. I've been in your position as of recently so that why I'm passing this on to you. Don't allow other peoples emotions and motives overshadow your judgment and heart.
I’m just like I don’t want her feeling like she can just walk all over top of me and my husband, but I also understand that Emily WILL act out over it and she’ll just worry the whole time she’s at the beach. I’m torn.
@bodybycheetos, I AGREE!!! That’s how I feel! That’s why I don’t feel like I should wait. We live by ourselves. We don’t live with her. We are completely independent.
Do you guys live with his mom? Girl, I know controlling in laws. There's balance. Sometimes you need to stand up for yourself and stand your ground, other things you ignore and let go. But if you let her dictate, she will forever think she has a say in every. single. thing. you do.
@mrschanandlerbong95, I REALLY believe it’s an attention issue.
@mrschanandlerbong95, I feel like she’s just really emotionally unstable and she doesn’t like the spotlight not being on her 24/7.
Why is this child so emotionally involved in yalls life? That’s really weird.
@chelleyb93, they’re involved, but they’re happy for us. She is the only person we’re having issues with.
PLUS guys, she came downstairs last night in the middle of him and his mom arguing and looked at Brandon and said, “Is Destiny pregnant?” Brandon didn’t say anything and his mom changed the subject. The girl already knows.
@1818.whiterabbit is your family as involved as his. There needs to be give and take in this situation. I agree with @bodybycheetos. At the end of the day this your life with your husband and no one else should dictate that. They'll be fine and either come around later or not but you shouldn't wear that. If your husband is push for his family to over step boundaries then he's wrong for that. He's married to you not his mother.
@bodybycheetos, he gave in to her crocodile tears, honestly because he loves his mom and I get that, but after I explained to him how I felt, he felt the same way. I don’t know if he even has his own opinion on the matter, to be honest. I feel like he’s just trying to keep his mom happy, but damn. We’re adults.
That's pretty damn weird. I'd probably announce anyway honestly. If they can't be happy for you two, then they will have to come around later..or not. But I wouldn't let some little girl and her mom who coddles her dictate what I do or make me feel like I have to hide big things going on in my life. How does your SO feel about it?
@mombassador, I agree, but Brandon feels like it’s important to have his close family involved in what’s changing in our lives. I dont do the whole control thing, and this is the first time I’ve had an issue. I don’t know what’s gotten into her.
I'm sorry to ask but why is your life causing the sister emotional distress. I don't feel like it's your mother in laws place at all especially for this long. You as a mother should feel overjoyed to tell people if that how you feel.
Honestly, I get where your coming from and I’d do what i want lol. Since you care for your mother in law so much tho maybe compromise and tell her that since she’s asked you to wait twice already, as soon as she gets back your telling everyone. No excuses🤷🏻♀️🤷🏻♀️🤷🏻♀️🤷🏻♀️🤷🏻♀️ I would wait the week but thats just me lol bcuz waiting once, OK whatever, waiting an extra week? Ok yea sure but thats all your getting. 😂😂😂😂😂 but it’s your life id say do what makes you feel comfortable 🤷🏻♀️🤷🏻♀️🤷🏻♀️ but yea if you wana avoid the MIL drama, ehh wait the week then tell everyone but make it clear to her that after that , your jot waiting bcuz its your baby and your an adult🤷🏻♀️🤷🏻♀️🤷🏻♀️💎💎💎
They are a little to much involved in y'all situation. If y'all have y'all own etc why is it anyone elses news but y'all. Seems to me your outside family is taking control of everything
Seems to me that someone forgot who's baby it is... You guys have the right to tell people whenever you want. If she can't except that than that's her issue. And as for your sister in law, I get her concerns but she should have more important things to be focused on at 15 and not the current state yours and your husbands relationship.
They are a little to much involved in y'all situation. If y'all have y'all own etc why is it anyone elses news but y'all. Seems to me your outside family is taking control of everything