I haven't had a relaxer in about 4yrs and love it! I've never really been into weaves and extensions tho. You just have to experiment with different products to see what works best for your natural hair. My hair is best with a wash and go. Good luck ?

@sangria, I never thought of it like that. You're definitely an insightful woman.

Thank you ladies. I really want my self esteem back. When I would relax my hair I liked to wear it scrunched with gel and grease. I have tight waves when I relax it.

I just miss my real hair but I don't want to damage it. A couple years ago it was sooo fried because I was not taking care of it. You all were so nice and helpful and I appreciate it. I'll post a pic when I decide what to do.

What do you ladies use in your hair? I try to stay away from. Heavy grease. I also really like the olive oil products. What do you ladies wear to keep the moisture in at night. I don't know how to use a wrap.

I wouldn't relax..because of all of the risks of cancers.but if you're into that..I've only been natural five years and my hair is unmanageable without heat..and my fro doesn't look liked everyone else's even though all the relaxer is gone..i just don't care..lol i have micro twists right now so i can exercise without worrying about my hair.

Hey I'm going through the same thing ?

Had weaves for a good few years and got sick of living up to someone else's standards of beauty. My coily, kinky Afro hair is beauty. Now I am rocking my natural fro. I recently cut about a third off of it and it's never been healthier ? NO HEAT. Even when deep conditioning I will leave under a cap for at least an hour and rely on body heat. Twists, braids, fro, puffs, buns; there is soooo much to do. Watch some YouTube tutorials on how to manage natural hair. They changed me ?.

Oh and you are beautiful. Your natural hair will only enhance it.

No idea the hair, just wanted to say I creeped and looked at your pictures. You definitely don't have anything masculine about you, your very beautiful!

Go on YouTube! There's tons of natural hair gurus who give all kinds of styling tips. I like Mini Marley but I can't think of any others right now off the top of my head

@sangria ?✊

I can't tell you what to do with your hair, but you definitely do not have masculine features. You are beautiful.

10 years ago my hair broke off TERRIBLY from perms. 8 years ago I chopped it all off into an A-line bob. 5 years ago I would straighten it everyday to make sure my curls didn't come out and fried it. My hair never grew to bra strap length; it stayed right above there. But I went natural (cut out heat) about a year ago and my hair has flourished. Look up Naptural85 on YouTube if you have type 4 hair. She grew her hair from a tiny fro to like waist length in a few years. I say go natural!

I have been both relaxed and natural. When I'm natural and have length, I usually wear high puffs. I never liked twist outs or braid outs on me. I'm currently relaxed and lately I have been wear buns. My hair is almost to my shoulders.. I usually stretch my relaxers 6-8 weeks or longer if I can. If it's not in a bun I wash, blow dry, and flat iron\curl and wear it down.

Its a struggle dealing with my natural hair! I've never had a perm and when it gets flat ironed it lasts 1-2 days max. Then its in a ponytail or bun because I'm not really good at doing creative styles. Then I've had a hard time finding good curl products for myself because my hair will start out great then halfway thru the day it will be puffy :( I prefer weaves or half wigs as a protective style. Theyre much easier and help my hair grow.

I always wear my own hair no relaxer and the struggle is real lol it's almost mid back length and thick as hell ?. I only apply heat 4 times a year so I pick and choose wisely when those times will be. In my profile my hair is straight but I mostly wear my hair in a bun or I wash my hair and do a braid out because I can't just wash and go like my daughter. I used to wear it straight all the time but got tired of damaging my hair for other people's liking when there isn't anything wrong with it in its natural state. I have had relaxers before so don't get me wrong I'm not against them just stopped one day 6 years ago and never wanted my hair bone straight again. I will say it's gonna be an adjustment at first because you aren't used to it but after a while you will feel more confident. You are beautiful btw so I think you could be bald and still turn heads, good luck!

When I first started I looked at a lot of YouTube channels for easy natural/ transitioning/ or relaxed no heat styles.

I've worn extensions forever and I'm going through the same thing.although my hair is 20" now I still can't wear in natural cause I don't have the energy to get up and do it every day. It's also been years since I relaxed it and I don't want to do anymore damage so I think for now I'll just keep it in extensions. Check out my ig if you want to see how I style it. @loveekriss_

Do you have a picture of your natural hair?

I've recently decided to do the same thing! I've been wearing extensions for a few years now. Last weekend I got a relaxer and cut my real hair into a cute bob. I'm still getting use to it but it's not as bad as I thought it would be. I'm not sure if you're on Instagram but @thecutlife is my go to page for inspiration.

Also, I can't pull off the frow. I've tried. It hasn't been relaxed in a couple years so I can relax the whole head right? I'm going to use the children's relaxer.

Thank you. Do you think I should not relax it and just blow it out and then straighten it? I know the relaxers are bad for your hair but my hair is unmanageable.

I don't prefer extensions because i can't get tip my hair to scratch it..lol

Im natural so...no chemicals or hair dye or anything..usually wear a fro or blow out and flat iron which is my favorite!

And from your picture,i don't think you have masculine features. you're beautiful

Thank you. I'm just tired if the extensions. They're expensive and I can't do much with them because I work a lot.

I know we don't have the same hair type but I've always loved the little ringlets on natural hair. I first saw them on Whitney Houston in the Cinderella movie she did and thought they were adorable. I know your hair type is more high maintenance than mine so I don't know if that would be easier than straightening or what, but it's a cute look. I'm all about cute and easy.

Whatever hair style you choose I'm sure you'll look great! And as long as you feel good about yourself, that's all that matters.