I told my friend my mom wants to throw me a baby shower and write on the invite "monetary gifts only" and he told me that people aren't trying to pay for my "gas bill" I'm offended because a lot of money goes into a baby shower, and if you're gonna give me a 10$ blanket from Ross that I probably won't even use it's a waste. I rather use those 10$ for my honest company diaper subscription.
So I’m not a fan of my fiancé’s family. I want you all opinion on what you would do. His family wants to throw me a baby shower. Yet they haven’t invited any of my family and friends and none of my fiancé’s friends. My fiancé and his niece haven’t spoke since May since I got into an argument with her and supposedly this baby shower is her idea. Would you go to a baby shower that no one you know or friends and family won’t be apart of? Would you just not show up? My fiancé has already voiced his concerns and they were ignored. I’m thinking about not even going.
What would you do? - baby shower SO my mom has been very negative about the baby my entire pregnancy. Especially in the beginning, she said the most HORRIBLE things about me, my DH and my unborn baby. Like that I was making a big mistake, that I was making her 2015 the worst year ever... etc etc. Even when she would do nice things she made me feel like I was a HUGE inconvenience and a burden to her. She told me to definitely NOT expect a shower or anything like that from her. Fine, whatever, I don't need her, I didn't have this baby for her to raise. I'm married, living on my own and paying all my own expenses.
FTM problems... So I've made it pretty clear that I want to buy my daughter her fist Halloween costume. Her babysitter/nanny keeps saying she wanted to make her one. I told her yesterday that I wanted to find her something that my SO and I could dress up as a family. So I told her I am going to get it. She just text me and said 'not trying to step on your toes but I bought her two costumes'. She does this all the time. Anytime I want to do the "first" things with her she immediately does it. It's making me sad. Like I wish I could quit my job and be home with her.
So we got in super late last night. Had to carry my daughter to bed. She had the nerve to try and wake me up at 7:30am saying she wanted breakfast. Smh (She wanted me to fix her a spread)🙄 I told her to choose some cereal. I'll fix her a bowl. Of course there wasn't any cereal that she wanted today 😴 I told her spoiled ass to figure it out and I went back to sleep 😂🤣 She ate an eggo.
deleted-user·
Usually whoever offers to throw the shower pays for most of it..
Sit down with your friend and make a budget on how much you are willing to spend on everything. That way she knows!
deleted-user·
Yeah, that's weird that someone would offer to throw you a shower and make you pay for it.
Whatheshell ·
Glad I'm not the only one who is confused on this. I thought it was a little weird.
deleted-user·
My sis want to throw me a shower ..so I said I saw a cake I like and I'll by it...she got mad and said I not suppose so buy nothing she will she about DAT....
deleted-user·
I've thrown more baby showers than I can count right now, and I paid for EVERYTHING so I would say the host should pay.
deleted-user·
Usually the host pays for the shower. And if that is a problem there will be more than one host designated for bigger showers who all split the cost evenly. I've been to and thrown a good bit of showers. I've never been the only host, so it was fairly inexpensive. The most expensive shower I was apart of was actually a couples baby shower. Even though there were 5 couples splitting the cost having that many people attend and throwing in actual food courses (not finger foods) for men got expensive. Plus, we served beer and cocktails. There are plenty of ways to have a beautiful shower and cut corners on expenses. I would look up a lot of diy projects to replicate things you can buy in a store that's so much cheaper and kind of fun/memorable!!
Whatheshell ·
Thank you everyone. I don't know if my MIL intended on doing a baby shower or not. If so then I guess they could help each other out. It's just getting stressful and it's forever away.
deleted-user·
I didn't pay for my shower but I gave the host a thank you card. When I threw a wedding shower the bride gave me a gift basket as a thank you. I honestly felt awkward, just a thank you would've been fine.
Whatheshell ·
I feel like if I pay for everything and help her do it all I might as well just throw it myself and if that's the case I'm not going to have one. I don't want to sound rude or selfish cause that's not it. It's just frustrating lol
deleted-user·
I've never heard of the mom paying if she's not the one throwing it
deleted-user·
Tell her to get and pay for whatever she wants and you'll reimburse her for half after your lo is born. That may deter her from wanting to purchase the most expensive things.
I paid for 1/2 of my baby shower, my lo's Godmother paid the other half. We both went shopping together and went half on the decorations, favors and prizes, she paid for the cake, I paid for the food to be eaten-my mom catered my baby shower. I think we spent a total of $200 for everything for my shower
deleted-user·
The one shower I hosted my friends mom mailed me a card with $100 target gift card in it, which was much appreciated. And with mine I offered to make the party favors because they are bring us gifts I should make the thank you part of it.
deleted-user·
If you are going to pay for it then you need to give her your budget. I'd make it lawyer than what you'd actually spend just to give yourself some wiggle room just incase she over spends a little.
Maybe when she sends you an idea that's a little expensive try to find the cheaper version?
Typically the party thrower would pay but I know of other mommas that have paid.
Whatheshell ·
Every time I told her it was a cute idea she wouldn't even text back she would just send more pictures. And now my SO is telling me his mom might want to throw me a baby shower and I don't want 2, the one my friend does would be small anyways because my parents aren't talking to their siblings. So it would be friends but I don't have a lot of friends, my group got small when I was pregnant with my daughter.
deleted-user·
You as mom to be are the LAST person who should pay - that defeats the purpose of a baby shower!
deleted-user·
Usually the host pays but I paid for my own. So my mom wouldn't have too. I spend 650 on a baby shower and still missing stuff
Whatheshell ·
She just offered to pay for it and I told her if she needed money to let me know and I would help
Whatheshell ·
When the time comes Im going to buy her a gift to show her I appreciate all that she did