I need your advice Me and my sis in law are very close and this time we both were pregnant one week apart... this is…

It’s so kind of you to care about them and want to do what is right. I struggled to talk about other babies and pregnancies the further into my infertility that I went. I had friends that were having babies and they understood that sometimes I just couldn’t talk about it too much. Then other times I’d make a big effort to get into baby stuff with them if I was in a stronger place. A mixture of space but knowing people are there for you really helps. I just hope they get their take home baby soon and end this awful waiting for them, poor poor things. ????? I also believe that my miscarriage baby stayed around me and waited for the right body so that he / she could come and join us. I just hadn’t cooked up the right arms/legs combo... ?

I’ve been in your SIL’s place. It’s a very painful place to be, but she needs to know that you are still there for her now that she’s heartbroken. Just call her or text her and tell her you love her and your there for her when she feels like talking.

So I know this is very different but one of good friends and I were pregnant together due dates in November - she had her little one is August and she was a fighter. However She passed away in early November and I had my son in October. I was in the same boat as you and didn’t know what to do so I didn’t talk to her or contact her for almost 6 months. I felt so guilty, I had a lot of complications with my son but he was still here. I didn’t know what to say Later I found out that she was in the same boat where she wanted to talk to me but didn’t know how. We are great friends and she now has a beautiful boy but if I had to do it over I wouldn’t have avoided her, my advice is give her some space and don’t talk a lot of baby stuff but still be there for her and talk to her.

Thank you so much ladies for your advice.

I texted her today, i just asked her how is she doing and asked her about what doctor tells her what is her next step. And when it will be over? She said she will be taking a pill soon and everything should be gone in about 2-12 hrs. I feel empty and broken. I lost my nephew or niece. And i feel like im loosing my brother and my best friend... I really want to call my brother but I’m scared to get emotional and make him feel even worse.

Having just gone thru a miscarriage, I️ can honestly say that my friends that i knew were pregnant before the miscarriage were easier to handle than the announcements that came out the weeks and months after. She may distance herself a bit, and may not want to hear the details, but if she is anything like me, it is SO much better that she already know than to be blindsided by it. Be gentle. Give her time. But definitely let her know you’re around as she needs. Drop off some wine and ice cream and a terrible movie! Good luck!

I'm so sorry for her but congrats to you! First off, don't be offended if it's hard for her to be around you. If you've never experienced fertility problems coupled with a miscarriage, you may not realize just how painful it is to see everyone around you so easily getting pregnant and carrying full term with ease. It feels like the most unfair personal attack against you that is possible. She is lucky you are being so sweet and sensitive to what she's going through, but she may not easily confide in you. This is just my personal experience on how I dealt with my fertility issues and miscarriage so of course, your sister may be different. But it's been 6 months since my miscarriage f and I'm 9 weeks along now and its still hard for me to see very pregnant women without envy

I wish you both the best of luck and I know it will all work out in the end. She's lucky to have you!

Oh man that is such a tough situation. I would just be honest with her about your feelings. Tell her you aren’t sure what to do or say but that you love her and are there for her. It’s so hard ?

Tell her you are there for her to support her and that you don’t want her to distance herself from you, and that you will be sensitive of course

She may also find it difficult to talk to you...as every milestone will be a reminder...

This happened with my sister and I and it caused a distance because my sister, my brothers partner and myself were all pregnant at the same time, and when my sister lost hers...it was too much for her to see ours. I guess it helped that she didn't live close by, but our relationship changed for a couple years...

I hope it doesn't go that way for you.

I hope she has enough support that she feels strong sooner.

All you can do is be there for her, as much or as little as she wants xxx

She still needs support. She’s hurting so deeply right now and needs you. Even if she doesn’t want to talk, just let her know you are there for her. You being pregnant might be a painful reminder to her right now but when the pain starts to be manageable she will reach out.

What would you want if the situation was reversed?

Maybe a gift and tell her how much you care. I would not shut her out.

Just tell her that you are there for her and care about her. In situations like this there isn't much you can say or do to make her feel better. But it is always nice to have a support system. She will talk about it when she is ready.