(Thread Closed) So this just happened. Deffinatly wasn't trying. Only been with my boyfriend almost 7 months. I already have a 4 year old son. Oh man. I'm shaking. Literally freaking out. 1 day before period.
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@miller It's an attention post. And it's getting exactly what she wants. Although, I'm wondering if she was indeed TTC, but just didn't want to admit it. She's posted other things to suggest it. She posted 2 weeks ago wanting to know signs and symptoms of early pregnancy, but if her TWW was just over 3 days ago to get her positive, then she must've known that she had just ovulated. She also said she's scared of what her family would say. So I would say that she was NTNP in hopes of falling pregnant. Either way, it was insensitive to say "didn't have to try and only been with him 7 months". TTC is a pretty non-judgemental zone (other than when you say things like that). Hell, people post photos of their cm and no one says anything. So if OP was indeed TTC, there was no need to try and hide it from a group of women with all types of situations trying as well. Although I agree with Miller about it shouldn't necessarily have been put here/worded that way; I do say congratulations on the new baby. They're a blessing.
No, but I also wouldnt be mad if the shoe was the other way around either . As in if I was homeless & someone said that to me. Its all about your personal perception of what is said . She never rubbed anything in your face, thats just how it was perceived . Things wont bother you unless you allow it to . Hope your day is good to you ma'am.
It would be easy to move on if she'd move the post ??
Or if people stopped calling me names and disrespecting me. Of course I'm going to respond to that.
If anyone had an ACTUAL reason that I'm wrong, instead of calling me bitter and jealous, I'd give it up. But no one has one because there isn't one. She should move this. Or the moderators should.
Wow, 3 days ago this photo was posted & its stilllll going. Lol. It truly amazes me how people will act when someone else is just trying to share their good news . Its extremely sad that in this day & time we simply can't be happy for others (regardless of the situation) . There is a saying "if you dnt have anything nice to say. . . " yall know the rest . Regardless of how it was meant some things just arent called for . Spread love . Save the egos & bitterness for somewhere else . CONGRATS ON YOUR BABY, REGARDLESS OF HOW IT HAPPENED . baby dust to each & everyone .
Honestly I wouldn't have even bothered with it if this forum wasn't the FIRST place she posted it. I just don't understand why she felt it necessary to post in ttc if she wasn't ttc. I don't understand why she felt like she had to say "I wasn't ttc and I've only been with my BF for 7 months". I don't understand why she didn't just say "you know what, you're right, I wasnt ttc and I see how it could be insensitive". I don't understand why she didn't just post in the pregnancy forum. I don't go to the moms over 40 section and say "hi, I'm a 20 year old mom and everything is super easy for me because I'm young". It's unnecessary and insensitive.
Firstly congratulations, but I'm really sorry I'm definitely not trying to offend anyone at all, but I agree with the other ladies as well, I had been ttc for a year with 2 ectopics and a miscarriage. This definitely does not make me feel jealous and I totally understand the ladies who think it was wrong to post this in the ttc forum as there are so many ladies ttc for sooooo long and even longer than 1/2 or 3 years. It's like rubbing it in someone's face saying oh well yh I didn't even try hahaha which is so wrong in so many levels. This should have been posted in the pregnancy forum.
Sorry if this makes me rude in any way but i have to agree with miller mama. Its not that im jealous im not. One friend of mine just had her baby and two others are currently pregnant and im so excited for them! Im really happy for OP. But there are women here who are having a hard time ttc. There are soooo many other groups to post to. Yes others here post positive test. But its different when someone has a hard time and then post a positive vs someone who wasnt even trying post one. One gives me hope that it will happen for me soon. The other makes me just feel like something must be wrong with me with my body for it to not just happen without trying. Im just saying its insensitive to those who are having a hard time and beginning to have doubt or are hard on themselves already.
Just like she can post what she wants, I can comment when I want. ?? thanks for your opinion. You could also move on since it doesn't concern you. I know I'm not the only woman who feels this way about this. I'm not afraid to say how I feel. This post was inconsiderate. She didn't post an announcement ANYWHERE BUT the ttc forum. Why? Why wouldn't she post in the pregnancy group? Why would she ONLY post in the ttc group if she wasn't ttc? Update: TODAY, 2 whole days after she posted here, she finally joined the pregnancy group.
She can post what she wants, you could've just kept scrolling instead of getting your panties in a wad over a post in a forum, all your comments to me sounded bitter and just a tad bit jealous and the fact that you feel the need to reply to every single comment says it all. I wish you the best in your ttc journey and I hope everyone here gets their BFP's soon ?
Asssss I said before miss Bree (if you had read through ALL the comments I wouldn't have to repeat myself) it's not jealousy and bitterness, it's just simply stating the fact that because she wasn't ttc it simply doesn't belong here. We're all happy for her, but it's the wrong group.
Maybe next time you try to do anything I'll come up to you and tell you I can do it without trying. ?? and see if that makes you "bitter"
It's not disgusting jealous behavior miss fay. It's stating a fact, which last time I checked didn't make me a bad person. ??
Like I said, I don't go to a support group for overweight women and tell them to look at my body because I'm skinny without trying.
THAT would be disgusting behavior.
Millermama don't let it stress you Hun. I 100% see where you are coming from and also agree with pp that others just don't want backlash. To post in a TTC group with a post stating that you weren't even trying is completely underhanded, smug and immature.....and this isn't coming from a bitter woman! So all the high horse comments can run along. I have children and am currently 6 weeks pregnant. I joined the ttc forum but got pregnant straight away, but would never have posted such a thing in here. I'm here to support other women, not rub it in their faces.
I've checked... She isn't looking for "advice" on this forum. Not the trying to conceive. She is pregnant already by "accident" if you haven't been keeping up. This was an announcement post, which happens. It's just the "omg we weren't even trying" post to a "trying" to conceive forum ... After you are already pregnant instead of posting to a pregnancy forum. And Miller mama, people agree, they may be afraid of speaking up due to backlash, but it is obvious you aren't the only one.
???? next these people will be trying to rule the government.... It's an ADVICE app. If you don't like something you see scroll past it ?? I thought I let little things get to me... ? a bunch of woman in one place = hormonal bad news!!? good luck all you ladies I've thrown the blanket in... Wedding day is in 40 days then honeymoon on the Maldives! Good luck on your baby making ladies ?
Miller mama, I personally don't see anything mean you said toward the op. I also don't quite get why she made the decision to post in a trying to conceive forum either about her being pregnant already by "accident" yet not trying to conceive when there are plenty of pregnancy forums, here. But, it's not the first time and it won't be the last time someone does that. An ultrasound update might be next. I wouldn't be surprised. Lol.
Also @sunshine no one should EVER say to another woman that they don't DESERVE to be a mother. How hateful of you.
I have been blessed with a daughter, and am on here because id LOVE to have another child, and I can assure you I am a WONDERFUL mother because I am aware of the fact that the things I do and say have an effect on other people, and that having different opinions than someone else does NOT make you any less of a person.
Never have I in this thread or on this community AT ALL said anything rude or hateful towards another woman, yet in this post alone I've received several hateful comments, all because I have a different opinion on where this should be posted.
I'm honestly so disappointed.
The women on here who are ttc are wonderful women who VERY RARELY have issues with other users. It's a bummer that a post that shouldn't have even been here in the first place made such wonderful women into such spiteful people.
Congrats ? ive been ttc for almost 9 years and let me tell you i gave up trying.......was diagnosed with pcos and stopped trying thought i would never be a mother again....well i am 19 weeks pregnant and it was a big shock to us. I wasnt even trying i was enjoying myself and stopped stressing myself over it and bam got pregnant. Happy and healthy 9 months to you ?
I just think it's funny how everyone is defending her, yet earlier when Deanna posted pretty much the same thing EVERYONE was "tearing her down" and being "childish"
Hypocritical and dumb.
The fact of the matter is by the definition of what this group is, you weren't ttc, so this doesn't belong here.
That does not mean anyone is being "childish" or "rude" or "tearing you down" for saying so.
I don't go up to all the women trying to lose weight and say "I'm skinny and I didn't have to try"
I don't go to a support group for trans people and say "I'm the gender I wanted to be and I didn't have to try"
You DIDNT HAVE TO post this in here. It was a CHOICE. To brag about the fact you're pregnant and it was EASY.
To sum all this up: congratulations. Have a great pregnancy. Hope it all works out for you. You are SO BLESSED that you didn't have to try. It would be great if you would choose not to come to a support group for women who are trying to conceive and blatantly state you didn't have to try. Have a GREAT pregnancy and life.
My husband and I are not trying super hard, not temping right now, I don't own any ovulation predictor kits or strips, and I have never been treated for infertility. We are married and have two boys, and right now we are at the point of wanting to add a 3rd, but not stress about it. If it happens, it happens, and in the meantime we are not using birth control and I am trying to improve my diet and exercise and hormones so a healthy pregnancy can happen. By my situation, because I have not been trying very hard for months or years, I may be in the wrong group of supportive women. I post and I follow posts here. We are a community.
I congratulate you on your bfp, and wish you a happy and healthy pregnancy! Don't stress about it...do what you need to do to better it, but if you are capable of loving this baby and your partner is too, you are pretty set! You've got this! It's scary right now, but it will be okay.
So sorry for the people attacking you. Congrats girl! Babys are a blessing no matter how they were conceived (trying or not)! I didn't try for my first and I was with my husband for about 3 months when we fell pregnant with my son. Now we are married with a beautiful little boy and another one on the way ☺️
No need to get into a cat fight ladies... I've been trying for 3 years 3 operations etc... Still no baby... But this is a app for anybody and I'm personally ever so please that you got your bfp!!! Every baby is God send and we should celebrate every baby... Well done you and much luck sent your way for the future!!!❤️?
No I wasn't actually trying, my sister was trying for a girl hence that post. This was the first month I was off birth control do to medical reasons. We tried to avoid ovulation day. Obviously that didn't happen. But we'll make the best if it.
I wasn't "tearing you down" and I did say congratulations, and that because you weren't ttc it would be good for the pregnancy group instead.
Lololol at these ladies who complain about people on here "being too sensitive" when nothing I said was rude and they're flipping their lids. Byyyyyeeeeeeee.
Hope you have a smooth pregnancy and all the ladies who are on here trying their best to have what you stumbled into get their bfps.
Congrats to you! My last baby was a complete surprise. I had just gotten a new job and everything and at first I was in shock but it didn't take long for the excitement to set in! Also, don't feel bad at all. That's just dumb reasoning. There are women in here that can't ovulate on their own but you don't see them complaining when we post blaring positive opks. I have one tube due to having an ectopic pregnancy. I don't post about how much harder I have it and blah disadvantages blah. I think it's honestly horrible and if my ttc journey ends up making me share those feelings I would probably take a break or something. Crazy.
Thank you guys! I actually had no symptoms except a massive hot flash a week ago where I felt like I was gonna pass out. I actually don't even feel pregnant. And I had one bout of nausea while driving and I thought "I think I'm pregnant " I tested at 10 11 and 12 dpo with negatives.
No. You do NOT need to apologize for being excited about your pregnancy or that it was so easy to conceive for you. This group is getting out of hand with the complaining about the way things are worded. A simple congratulations should be good, and move on!!!!! If you're offended, GO READ ANOTHER POST.
*Ahem*
Congratulations on your pregnancy. I am glad that it was a blessing that came out of nowhere. Those are pretty dang awesome!!! Good luck in pregnancy.
I'm sorry I honestly wasn't trying to offend. Hope you all get your bpfs soon.
Her comment was thoughtless. Millers comments aren't rude, they are true, it was insensitive although I doubt the original OP even have it a second thought. Before I'm classed as jealous too, I have a 19m lb and I'm not trying although I plan to in the next few months hence I have been checking in the last week or so! Seems to me people are singling out Miller for her views