The first thing I noticed in this pic was the penmanship on the right & how much I love it. ???

I'm not against it saying to be ladies and gentlemen. What bothers me is what they assume that they are doing to misbehave. I do believe acting like a lady and acting like a gentleman just means being respectful towards others and being well mannered, but if my daughter was sitting with her legs wide open I would tell her to shut them and sit like a lady. I guess some people may think some of my views are flawed and I'm sure they are but I'm only human and just trying my best.

Lol you guys would fight over chairs

Here's a problem solver. Why don't we get a yellow chair and put "if you throw a fit, expect to sit" on it. Is that gender neutral enough?

I wouldn't buy any designated time-out chair. We don't have the space for a piece of furniture that (hopefully) wouldn't be used that often, and we've yet to use time out with our 3-year-old (not that I'm against it, per se).

But, if I were in the market for one, it wouldn't be this one. I think kids absorb more from their environment than we give them credit for, and while stereotypically masculine/feminine children shouldn't be shamed, I also don't see any benefit to telling kids "boys should be this way, and girls should be that way."

I like the message and idea.

Weird how that happens in a conversation

Merida is a strong female lead, even in brave though the gender roles are quite clear and the little boys are allowed to run amuck (boys will be boys!)

The classic princesses: Cinderella, Snow White, sleeping beauty, even jasmine, Ariel, belle follow the pretty traditional looking for a man to save them or fulfill their happiness.

Because the expectations for behavior are clearly different from the descriptions written on the chairs. Boys will be disciplined for hitting, kicking, and yelling. Girls for whining and being sassy.

Thanks, J. I'm used to the rudeness on this topic-my extended family has the same response.

To answer the Disney princess question. Merida, Tiana, Mulan, and Pocahontas are all strong Disney characters.

Pookiedoo and Maalika, I'm sorry that other posters feel the need to be rude when responding with their opinions about this topic.

Some people see them as "just chairs" while others see the message WRITTEN ON the chairs and its implications.

These chairs imply that boys and girls have to act a certain way that is specific to their gender. I.E- implying that girls must act like ladies, rather than roughing around, etc and that boys "will be boys" through their rough housing and manliness.

The problem is not with the time out chairs. The problem is that the message WRITTEN ON the chairs reinforces gender stereotypes that children should not be forced into at such young ages.

How about a time out chair without the messages written in these pictures? How about teaching all children to be polite, understanding, athletic, crafty, mechanically inclined, sensitive, etc?

End rant.

? This entire post is full "Nope. Nope. Nope." I don't think I've rolled my eyes this much since I was a teenager.

I read your comment just fine. People can raise their children with beliefs other than yours and that still doesn't mean their children will be bullies and to blame for your child's self esteem issues.

You ignored the question about disney princesses being "strong female leads."

I knew what this was going to be about before I even opened it ??

@the two pps, I think you missed my point.

Yes of course I agree with you- my little girl loves dolls too! That's just the way she is! (She also loves cars but that's beside the point).

What I meant was- when people say, the VAST MAJORITY of girls prefer dolls to cars and the VAST MAJORITY of boys prefer cars over dolls, those statistics are most likely skewed by taught behaviours/advertising etc.

I'm not AT ALL suggesting that there are not boys and girls that naturally fall into 'traditional' gender roles. I'm simply suggesting that most children are naturally an amalgamation of the two.

I also don't like these because my children aren't told they are being disciplined for shouting, or giving sass. They are reprimanded when they do something unkind, or aren't respectful of others, or not listening and being unsafe. I realize it's a semantic issue to a point, but the difference in emphasis matters.

@lola the issue that I often see is that when the child does choose for themselves, other adults assume that the parent is applying a gender stereotype to their child. My daughter loves her baby doll. She watches myself and dh take care of our 6 month old. She's acting out what a good parent is... Because she sees both dh and I do it. I don't feel that's about gender personally because both dh and I model that behavior for her. Women are not the only ones who take care of children, men can model that behavior too. It's called being a father...

@lola- I strongly disagree with your comment that preference for certain toys is taught. I have always been staunchly against providing gender specific toys for my children and my son chooses "boy" toys and my daughters really prefer "girl" toys... So your comment being flaunted as fact is flawed.

@thatmomlyfe

Oh I complete understand. I am very against this modern and misguided feminist movement. That is one of the reasons I am very passionate in speaking out about how gender roles and stereotypes affect our kids. I do know I tend to focus more on the boys side but that is only because I have a boy and I worry about the world he's growing up in but I do care about the girls too, its just not something I'm faced with worrying about everyday.

The point about not assigning gender roles is that any child/person can be ANYTHING they want to be.

You're a woman? Want to be a SAHM? Great. A doctor? Great. A nurse? An astronaut? Great.

You're a man? Want to be a SAHD? Great. A doctor? Great. A nurse? Great. An astronaut? Great.

I'm sorry, but all and any type of kid likes dolls, cars, Legos, trains, 'Frozen'...(no, I'm not saying YOUR kid specifically does. I'm saying that there are boys and girls everywhere that like everything).

If MOST girls like dolls and MOST boys like cars, I assure you that is entirely taught and not inherent behaviour. Girls are not born with an inherent preference for dolls over cars. That's clearly nonsense.

And it is TAUGHT because there are TV shows and movies and ads and magazines and chairs like this hammering 'the norm' into their heads EVERY SINGLE moment of their lives. So yeah, it might be 'just a chair' but it's part of something much, much bigger. It's the same reason most women have such poor self esteem and body issues- because every image they see on a daily basis tells them that they should be a certain way...a way that only a very small percentage of us can live up to. We ALL know how damaging that can be.

OF COURSE there are masculine boys. OF COURSE there are feminine girls. But there are also all kinds of other boys and girls. Trying to FORCE a child, or any human for that matter, into a role they are uncomfortable in is hugely damaging. Fact.

@ronnie I just was coming from a different perspective is all. Not meant as an attack or anything, I hope you didnt take it that way. I just feel the stay at home parent is often a voice that is undervalued in society so I make a point to share that perspective. It just bothers me when "feminists" treat sahm's like we are taking our gender back 100 years or something lol.

@thatmomlyfe

Oh I'm definitely not trying to put down women that are housewives, I'm a sahm as well and I personally did it because its what was best for my family. I feel like maybe I'm not expressing my point correctly. I do not think its wrong to have girly girls or "manly" boys, I think its great if that's what that child wants. If I had a daughter that only wanted to be a mom I would definitely encourage her, I love being a mom, if we were able to I'd have a house full of kids. But I also want to encourage others to see that it is ok for their boys to be sensitive and their girls to be rough. All kids are different and they'll always feel a certain way, we can either encourage it or suppress it. I know I'm not doing anything wrong raising my son the way I am and if I have a daughter it'll be in a similar way, I wont say it'll be the same because I plan on raising each kid according to their needs and personalities.

I do apologize though if I have come off as rude or offensive to anyone, that is not my intention.

To say her child is the reason your son struggles with his self esteem is unfair. Someone can raise their child with gendered stereotypes without raising them to be a bully. I absolutely believe in teaching your children to embrace who they are...but you are taking your assumptions too far to assume the children of someone who disagrees with you is to blame for your son's self esteem issues.

I don't see how disney princesses are "strong female leads." They are stereotypically female, looking for happiness in a strong man or waiting for Prince Charming to come save them. I love me some disney, but I would never describe their princesses as strong female leads...am I missing something here?

Have a drink while you're at it, you need it.

@ronnie I want to touch on what you're saying from a different perspective. I chose a stereotypically "female" role for myself. I'm a sahm and I love it. A lot of times I'm treated as less than because I'm not a working woman. I come from a family where my grandmother was the first female business owner in her small town and my mother is a CFO. My dad was a stay at home dad from the time I was 12 and my brother was 11. To me choosing to stay home wasn't about gender or anything relating to it, but more of a lifestyle. I grew up with a parent in the home and I felt it kept my brother and I on track and out of trouble in our teenage years. Sometimes when people see a stay at home parent, they do assume it's because of gender roles, but that's not always true.

I want my children to choose their own path, again, regardless of the gender role assigned to it. I want their choices to be accepted, even if they are non traditional or not accepted by society. Women are not less than for choosing a role that applies to their gender, and neither are men. I think it's important to teach our children that feminism is about choice and opportunity in whatever form it takes. We do not need to completely denounce gender roles as acceptable choices for that gender, but rather make ALL choices equal.

They are chairs for crying out loud..you're reading way too much in this. Why make something out of nothing?

I just can't... It's Sunday.

Well the women in my family that said that were old school women that were set in traditional women roles to be a housewife, obey your husband, be the only one raising kids type people, its not stereotyping but it was the role they believed women should have based on their gender, which is why I said I hate gender roles. I dont see that happening as much but it still does, I see women telling their daughters they cant do a certain thing because its for boys all the time. You never know how something "small" will effect a child.

I think the doggerel is painfully twee, completely apart from any stereotyping issues. Plus the chairs look cheap and ugly.

My son wears blue, my daughter wears pink. Dd loves princesses, Daniel Tiger, Hello Kitty and Spider Man. My son is too young to know what he likes but he will play with any toy in front of him, regardless of its color. His tub is my daughter's old pink tub and he uses her old "girly" towels and washcloths. My son is still a boy and my daughter is still a girl. I want them to be who they are, whether it fits a "gender stereotype" ... Or not. If my son wants to wear makeup and pink, I'm open to it. If he wants to hunt and play football, I'm open to it too. Same with my daughter.

What i am saying is this argument can be applied to basically anything that appears "gendered". I don't want my kids to be put into a gendered box if you will, but I also want them to be who they are. Since I have a boy and a girl, it's more practical to get a gender neutral bench for time out instead of these two chairs. But even if I chose these chairs, I can still be supportive of my child's gender identity, whatever it may be. Letting a girl wear pink or a boy wear blue doesn't mean that you ONLY accept a "gender stereotype".

@maalika, judge much? Wow. You thi k you know about how I will raise my kids just because I said I think people read too much into these things? It's a facking chair for goodness sake....

Another example of why I hate gender roles that sides more on a girl side I guess? Growing up I was always told to act like a lady, so was my sister and girl cousins, one common thing we were told was "calladita te miras mas bonita" "you look prettier when you're quiet". That really affected me, girls should not have to feel like they have to be submissive, quiet and always proper. They should feel fine speaking their mind and know that they are more than their looks.

If my daughter wants to dress all in pink and glitter and butterflies, that is fine as long as she is happy and comfortable with herself. But, I will not insist that she like those things. I won't teach her that those are appropriate for girls and not for boys. In the same way that I will not teach my son that he has to like sports, trucks and getting dirty. If he does, awesome. If he doesn't, that's fine too. I want my children to know themselves and love themselves, regardless of what the rest of the world thinks.

I think people read too much into stuff like this. Don't like, don't buy.

Cute! I like them!

I think it's pretty corny tbh.

Also our personalities dont come from our genitals...

I know I'll be unpopular for saying so but I think gender roles are important. That does not mean that I believe children are to be treated badly when they don't conform but I do believe men and women were created for specific but different purposes. This is not a bad thing as today's society would like to have us believe.

I think we need to stop nit-picking these things to death.

Awww that's cute

It's led to an interesting discussion on gender stereotypes. What's wrong with the post?

I think some of you are reading too much into this.

Why is this a post ?

I will encourage my boys to know themselves and to be confident in whoever they are, regardless of their gender.

But what if your girl is, in fact, "girly"? Is it okay to encourage that? It just seems like it's becoming more acceptable to encourage boys to be "girly" than it is to encourage girls to be "girly". And vice versa. The whole thing is just silly to me.

We're all humans and everyone is different. God made us man and woman so we could reproduce, even for those that dont believe in god know the reason we're men and women is just for reproductive reasons. As a child I played with boys hated dresses and was VERY rough, not your stereotypical girl. Ds is very sweet and loves brushing hair and giving everyone kisses, so yeah we're very different emotionally I guess but not exactly like what your comment implied.

There are differences between all children, not just boys and girls. I have 3 boys and they are all different. My middle son hates to get dirty and is never physically aggressive or loud. So the "boy" chair wouldn't make any sense for him.

I think it's super cute. I will never understand why people get so offended by differentiating between boys and girls. Guess what?! They are biologically, and in most cases emotionally, different. That's how God made us.

Words carry so much power. If it was just a chair, whatever, but with the message I don't agree with them. Not a fan of gender stereotypes and putting kids into a certain box because they are a boy or girl.

These chairs encourage gender stereotypes, and therefore, I think these chairs are ridiculous. ?

These are not just any chairs. They are chairs specifically used for discipline. The message should fit with your discipline philosophy or there's no reason to use these specific chairs.

Its not that I'm offended by this, but I do try to stay away from gender roles. My son is very sweet and sensitive, he got very sad one day because he saw some dogs growling and barking at each other and he started to cry someone had the nerve to say he was acting like a little girl. I dont want my son to grow up listening to those comments. Its demeaning to women and I dont want him to feel like he has to act like something he's not to feel like a man.

I don't like the messages on the chairs. Words have power and need to be chosen carefully.

this has nothing to do with this.. but yesterday at my nieces bday party there were triplet boys basically tearing up the house and one of them comes while my niece is opening up her presents and he grabs the table cloth and rips it and drops half of her presents on the ground.. the mom says 'oh no! oh well, boys will be boys! (:'

i think its dumb as hell when people try to make it a gender thing.

but anyways.. no i dont see anything wrong with these chairs lol

This is the most ridiculous thread I've ever seen?

Come back, maalika! Don't leave me standing alone out here! ?

I don't think I was pointing fingers. I asked people's opinions. I fully understand that I don't need to have them in my house if I don't want them.

And for the record, you're judging me for my opinion because you think it's wrong. And that's ok. You're allowed to, just own it.

I had a teacher once that told us none of us were people until we learned compassion and how to behave like people. He said some of us were close to being people and some of us never would be people, I'd probably write something like that instead. That teacher also used to say dont be sorry be better and thats become my favorite lesson that I'll definitely teach my son.

Not everything has to be stereotypical or whatever , yeah it's suggesting that girls are whining and being sassy and boys are shouting and kicking but seriously it's hardly poisoning children's minds

I had thought these were a cute idea but I see your point. Assuming boys are rough and girls are whiny. I have a boy but I've never had a problem with him kicking to hurt someone, and for the most part he's pretty gentle, well learning to be gentle, but aren't all toddlers pretty rough in general?

My issue with them as well, maalika. I have no problem with a time out chair. I have issue with the stereotypes. Most toddlers I know, regardless of gender, are sassy, whiney, throw fits, throw dirt, kick. It's not gender specific behavior. I'm raising my children to be quality human beings, to understand appropriate behavior. I feel like these chairs just continue to push unnecessary societal norms regarding gender roles. I don't believe that we should teach "boys will be boys" or "girls will be girls".

I avoid things that indicate boys are one thing and girls another. I also don't do time out.

Smh.

Do you feel like the separation of boy and girl is necessary, tarruh? I feel like it's unnecessarily stereotypical.

What don't you like about them?

What is wrong with them?