Ok I know I've done a few of these but my friend posted this on FB and we're getting some hilarious results. This was my…

Ask Tierra (niece) if she wants McDonald's??

Will do! Don't worry about it. ?

Pass by the store and get some string cheese if you can

Fantastic!

??

Next door having been chopping down more trees

But that's super exciting I think that's probably the funnest part of your job is the shipments huh

"Are you with him?"

"So how's about that bunker? We got 1K to throw at it ?"

? In response to the Russian ship currently 50 miles from my home. I am laughing so hard at this thread.

"Ugh I just wanted that damn house! ?"

That's good

Anytime and you are more than welcome!!

Sunday night since Stephanie is off work, kids don't have school Monday

More importantly, what day should we go for curry?

Okie dokie

Let me know if you head out

Cool you can just do it at the ATM machine

"His sippy cup is inside." NOOOOO!!! It makes it sound like my child died or he was drinking blood. ?????

"It literally is so recurrent the medicine works but it comes back always"

'Go to sleep'.

https://www.pinterest.com/pin/221239400424817821/

Can u bring me a coca cola and some cool ranch Doritos from the store please and thank u lol

If they're real that's a good ass deal!

You're welcome ?

?????

You said that you wanted to talk??

"Hey mama! How's the baby?"

????????

????

@@@@bad, I guess never ever go broke around you lmao

@op, iron supplements are probably a good idea after seeing this picture! Lol

Mine was "way to go judge!"

In response to the judge that court ordered a drug addicted prostitute to be on birth control. (She lost 4 kids to the state for being unfit already? )

I gotta feed ruby. Where do you want to go?

"Okay" that could go sooo many ways.

Let me know if you want me throw your laundry in I didn't see where you layed your clothes out

Mine is a meme. Its Mr. T and it says "Hey boy... you look mighty cute in them jeans, now come over here and fck me up the ass"

?

Not sure, waiting on colton. ??

Sloane is smiling at the ceiling fan. She loves those ceiling fans.

That was such a good nap! Glad I set an alarm ha

That's good. Yeah I'm sure it's a little weird for him too. But as long as he's happy.

"I love you so much too, be careful"

You can come anytime

"Do you want to play a game with me?"

"How much money do you have saved?"

English

Ok I'm home

I'll pick them up after work tomorrow

"You called? I was washing dishes."

ETA: or was i really washing dishes when you called? ?

"Ooookie dokie then! Draco would enjoy that! ?"

Yeah that happens too. I remember you told me and I was so sad for all your gorgeous shoes lol

Yeah that's not good ...it looks horrible! Make sure he does rest ! Even if he feels better

"??????" legit my last text ?????

No worries but thats totally my fault!!!!! This is great!

"I'm afraid to eat lol"

"How much was that big box of wipes from Amazon" lol wow that oddly fits this

"Because that's facked"

Actual sms text message:

"Some stuff from lab"

My friend asked me what was on the chemistry quiz

On whatsapp:

"I know it's weird sometimes I get cramps and heat flashes but my period isn't showing up"

Was talking to my cousin about spotting while bf. Lets hope this isn't what my period looks like when it comes back ?

???

" Leave it. "

"That's fine. I just expect a million $ for taking one for the team."

My bff said she'd run me over for 5 million $.

"How did the meeting go?"

Not so good I guess ?

"I think they are the same price lol"

"I feel bad lol" lol!!!

Boys...

The headache is better. Not gone but definitely better

I swear sawyer has a 6th sense about when I'm sleeping.

It's been a long couple of days.

It's awful this year

"They definitely did something right when they raised hawk and how Raven went so horribly wrong we may never know".

I had my judgey pants on earlier. ?

Good morning,Please be advised there is no Lolly Pop lady out St James this afternoon. Please be careful.Kind regards

??

"Throwing up again"

???

"Babe, did you teach our son to do that? It's so cute!"

"Yeah! The squeal is totally gone." ??

I need to stock up! I want enough to last all year round!! ??..... was talking to my friend about Easter eggs

"Do the cats have food? Chloe is bugging me"

"7-9pm though. ?"

"Yep, the tambourine just went down" hahaha

(My son pulled the tambourine off his exersaucer)

"I definitely will ?. Miss u guys ?"

We are leaving funeral home now. We may stop for a bite to eat once we get to Nj. I'll keep you posted.

"Lmao but you'll help me paint, right?"

"I was already here when you asked if I was coming lol I got here at 8:30"

Some of you guys sound like murderers lol

"The city inspected the hot water heater and said all is fine."

"I've washed her sheets and comforter and I made a solution to take the smell and stain out of the mattress and sprayed it." ?

"It's like as soon as I clean it up, he does it again. It's never ending!"

?

There is an urgent care 6 blocks from your house right by the gas station on Southfield rd.

Lol, My cousin just moved to my moms neighborhood and shes sick and asked where the closet urgent care was so she can get checked out and a drs note for work lol

"It's like a redneck ball pit" lol

Lmfao @pp

We gave him Motrin.

ETA: I don't think that's gonna help!

The surgery is not invasive at all.. Lol.. My grandma is haveing eye surgery right now..

Yeaaa! Mr. Gator kicking ass (?? dh was playing poker & winning).

I just got my period babe --- I swear that was the last text I sent! Lol oh my god

And the other text mssage to my brother was "NO REGERTS". Lmao funnier ??????

Brunch for your birthday and then cut the cake at home, star wars themed cake sounds good? Trust me, you're going to love it. (Now this makes me an instant suspect OP, to my DH)

Very welcome. ??

Did boo show you those videos?

I would have already been arrested. Haha that's pretty fitting ??

"She made a big mess!! I have my hands full with her, so messy ??"

She's so silly

"Ugh, everyone wants a fee"

"Well, I didn't know that, so you'll have time to pick out which pieces you want to keep"

Haha, talking about things I've already packed away for our move.

Yes you send how u want it too her want me to message her first to ask?

"Any other time he only eats one lol"

"Just your luck..."

"I'm on my way home!"

My SOs was "Did you find a replacement yet for Elvia?" Lol. I laughed wayyy to hard.

Call me.

"Yuck ? lol thank youuuuuuu!"

Hahahah wtf

Books came in! They all look good

Pick me up a pregnancy test. ?

Text me when your close! I don't want you to see your gift yet.

Pick me out something yummy ?

Glitch