Gender Roles!!?
How do you ladies feel about gender roles in a marriage/relationship? I was talking to some women at my job and one is in her late 40s (i'll be 23 in nov). She feels as if a man should never have to cook or clean. She says a woman should never have to put gas in the car or take out the trash. I totally disagree lol! Maybe in the older days when women stayed home all day and the man worked all day.. Then I wouldn't mind, but being that both my husband and I work 40+ hours a week each I feel as though we should split responsibilities. Now I cook dinner for my husband and I do the laundry, get his clothes for work etc.. But I also take the trash out if it's full and I'm on my way out the door. I have no problem with going to the gas station and filling up my tank. If I'm working late and my husband is home, he will cook dinner and have it ready for me when I get home. I never ask him to do so, he just does it. Just like he never have to ask me to cook we just do what works! My husband also cleans the house when he feels in the mood. I definitely clean more than him but maybe twice a month he'll spend all Sunday cleaning (he's off on Sundays and Im not) and when I get home he has dinner ready and our son bathed and ready for bed. Some say that's a "woman's job" but I don't think so. What do you ladies think?
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I think however the house hold works and functions best is whatever the couple choses. Some people like the old fashioned way, some like it vice versa. Either way, we are such a diverse culture with different lifestyles, one way of life may be a perfect fit for one household and a complete disater for another.
Well, I don't live with my SO but when ever I'm with him for days/weeks or months it's 50/50. We do everything expect he hate doin the dishes and cleaning up after he cooks. He dsnt mind cooking b/c I'm not a cooker but everything else I can do. I'll clean the whole house and he will help organize things makes it easier for me to clean. He takes out the trash but I do it if it's on my way. We both pump gas, if I have his car and I see it low I will pump it. I do grocery and sometimes we shop together. We both do laundry. He cleans the basement feeds and washes the dogs. He wants to be the provider when it comes to financial. He dsnt want me to work once he has that high income comin and OfCourse once I move in with him. But other then that, it's 50/50.
I like gender roles, to me it's kind of beautiful, the woman being the nurturer and the man being the guardian. Of course with modern times it's almost impossible to fit into those roles but I still love the idea of it. When my boyfriend comes home I cook him a meal every night and I always do the cleaning, however he does help a lot of the time. It's really just the way we were both raised and we like it so we've never done anything different(:
I think it is important to teach all children life skills regardless of gender. Such as cooking, cleaning, car car, gardening, budging, fishing, etc. Basic survival skills in the modern world. With that being said, I do believe that there are certain personality traits that tend to be more masculine or feminine. However, there are some who would be the exception to that as well. My husband and I tend to share the house hold responsibilities now, but when we first got married I thought I was supposed to do it all. He told me that he didn't feel right about that and that he would like it if I would let him help. I said ok. He is a great cook.
I'm a sahm. Josh works 40-70 hours a week depending on if there is a shut down, he has cooked for me since I had Brookelynn last Saturday and I had complications. But when I'm well, I do all the house stuff. Cook, clean, everything. He always has a plate waiting on him when he gets in from work and his fpdrink fixed. I lay out his work clothes and his stuff for his shower. He takes out the garbage and maintains the cars. I get up and fix breakfast for him and the kids before he leaves for work and they go to school.
I was just raised that way. Especially since he is working and I'm not. He supports us financially, and I support us domestically. In my eyes, that is 50/50. It's what works for our relationship. I appreciate him and all he does, and he appreciates me and all I do.
For anyone to still have that mind frame has life & bullsh*t confused for real
My husband and I do a lot together to help each other as far as cooking, cleaning, pumping gas, etc...
Hell I even call myself trying to help him fix on our vehicles if it's a problem that's "supposedly" a mans job & we get it done
Lmao until he runs me off cause I'm asking to many questions about what's that part & where does this go ? ?
We both was definitely raised old fashioned.
My husband works, I stay home and hold down the fort. I cook, clean, do laundry. I don't even drive when we go places, he deals with the trash and goes out to feed the animals.
I'm pregnant now so babies are in the future and we both agree it's in our kids best interest to have the mother at home. He doesn't like the idea of a woman working either, he makes enough to support our family and very much enjoys his line of work so we have no problem. But if things were to turn sour and we needed the income I would be willing to go to work until he found something. This is mutual though so it works for us!
The way I see it is what ever works for you as a couple. My DF will never have to cook his own meal or clean the house or get his own plate as long as I am with him. He doesn't do dishes or anything. On the flip side I don't need to work as hard as he does because in his mind men are the providers. He does the cars, the trash, fixing things around the house etc. And that's what works for us.
I think as a married couple or any couple at all . We should help each other out . I am like you , me and hubby share our chores . We both cook and we both clean . I think that's how it should be . Although he cooks and clean more than me , that's because he's a neat freak , which doesn't bother me at all than I don't have to do it ????
The only gender role i believe in is that the male should provide for the female. I know every relationship is different. Even tho i dont work my husband loves to cook and does most of the cleaning. He prefers to clean. Of course i pick up and clean during the day. And during the week i cook of he will be off late. I honestly think genderroles are good to extent.
I'm a SAHM and don't believe in gender roles. I do most of the cleaning as my husband is at work but he does some cleaning as and when. I also do the washing as my husband generally damages it ? he does a lot of the cooking which he enjoys (he's home by 4.30pm) although I do sometimes. He does the dishes in the evening just because he insists! Although sometimes I do them of he's doing something else. I am studying every evening so he now also does the ironing for the 3 of us. He usually takes rubbish out but I do if he's not here. He usually fills the car tank up so I don't have to as it means me taking our toddler into the garage. I never have to ask him to do anything we just work well as a team.
I agree! My husband hates the dishes but still does it. I don't expect him to put gas in my car unless he's driving it while its low. Just like I don't expect him to get dressed and drive the trash to the compactor (we live in an apartment) when I'm leaving out anyway! I think that's fair. But my supervisor disagrees. She says is y2k women are changing the game lol. Honestly, I think the game changed Itself for us.. Now a days both parties have to work in order to live comfortably.
I would love to be a sahm when we have kids. When I was growing up, I barely spent time with my mom because she was always working. So I just want that bond with my kids. Right now, I do the cleaning, laundry and sometimes I cook. My SO believes that he should be the provider for his family. He also takes the trash out. I have no problem pumping the gas but when we are riding together, he does it. Taking out the trash is no big deal I just rather he do it. My SO cooks..... when he wants to.
Its 50/50 as far as I'm concerned. The only thing we agreed on was me doing dishes and him taking the garbage out: he hates dishes and I prefer to wash them over garbage duty.
The only time I expect him to put gas in my car is if he drove it and its low. I would top up his if I ran his down.
I love to cook, so I dont mind it, but he will jump in and cook if when he wants to. Laundry: we both need clothes outside lol. He has military uniforms, so it gonna get done regardless of who's doing it.
Cleaning: we'll split it.
Again, teamwork.
It needs to get done at the end of the, so it doesn't matter who does it.
I still don't live with my boyfriend but we have some things accorded. My boyfriend always tells me jokingly that I will support him financially because I'll be a dentist and he thinks I'll be rich. Once I told him I will but he would take care of all the housekeeping since I'm amazingly messy and he got so offended ?. He told me "I didn't study 5 years architecture to clean a house and cook meals". But it's true, we both will have our professions and will work on them. So we've actually accorded that there are no roles related to genders. If he can do something while I can't, he'll do. And so I will when he can't. Nothing sticked to "he's the guardian and I take care of home and children" (ಠ_ಠ). No! I will work, he'll work and we'll split the necessities. Gladly, no children planned.