As previous posters suggested I think you should only allow BD outside in waiting area and let you le BF be there for the delivery and support system. If the BD wants to be in the baby’s life you will not have to ask him he will take the initiative. However you should discuss visitation rights with him if he chooses to stick around. Maybe he had a change in heart but my concern would be with the baby and your new BF who has been there longer for you. Good luck!

I agree with some of the other ladies here. Your bf gets the priority. The ex shouldn't be involved until the baby is born. And then you guys can establish some visitation. You're only connection to him is the baby, you don't owe him anything or need to involve him in any emotional type of way until that baby is here. I do think it's important to include the bio dad in the babies life if he wants to be though. If you don't, the baby will grow up and be resentful that you made those decision for them.

Thank you ladies. It's a huge relief having people support me. My ex's family is basically attacking me and saying how horrible of a person I am and I'm not doing the right thing for my baby, but I know I am. My boyfriend has been amazing. He was the first one to feel the baby kick, and he cried when he felt it. He also paid for a 3D ultrasound because HE wanted to see the baby! I never asked him to. He really loves this baby like it's his own and has been there every step of the way. I won't keep my baby away from his biological father, but I'm not going to just allow him to come in and out of his life.

I wouldn't have the bio dad in the hospital room.while you give birth. Your not a couple, he just now decided he wanted to be apart and it's probably because he's jealous of your bf and doesn't want another man being the dad. Your man has been there from the start, loved and supported you which is hard to find now a days. He's your partner, your support person and will be in your child's life than the bio dad. He's earned his place in baby's life and the delivery room! I absolutely would not allow my ex in the room in place of my man. He can wait in the waiting room and see baby afterwards-if he's even still around by then. You definitely shouldnt keep your baby away from bio dad but he doesn't need to be in the delivery room. That's a special, private moment for a couple. Don't take that away from your man and sabotage your relationship. You've got a good man, don't ruin your relationship for a piece of shat ex who may or may not even decide to show up or be around.

I personally wouldn't have him in the room during labor, allow your boyfriend if you want him there , if you're breastfeeding make it clear to your ex baby will be with you for a minimum of 6 weeks straight to adjust to the bond and breastfeeding, he can come and see baby when it's okay for you, but your boyfriend does have to realize there's potential for your sons bio dad to be involved and sounds like bio is wishy washy though and I wouldn't hold too much light to that situation he might be around for a little bit and might leave again good luck mama I know it's hard

I would have your current bf in delivery room. That is someone to support you, seems like the ex would cause more stress for you instead. I would allow him to be part of baby's life after birth though.

I think u shud play both sides until the baby comes because its easy for them to be on the sidelines while ur pregnant. Who is really going to be there to support you and the baby once baby is here? Your bf seems like a great and sweet guy but he doesnt owe you anything and he could change his mind. I would just be cautious to both of their feelings and let them know u understand how they feel. People react to pregnancy different maybe it took some time to sink in for him. U dont have to let him in for ur delivery tho i feel thats a very personal and special time for you. He stresses u out enough ?

I agree w kjh-- U have to do what's best for u but I Wouldn't sabotage my self and relationship and support system for a dead beat who most likely won't stick around. Deff wouldn't ruin the hospital moment for the one that does care. Maybe a few days later dead beat could stop by for a few min then go (but I'm not sure he even deserve that)and later when your settled at home discuss some visiting schedule. Most likely dead beat won't make it that far he just seems unreliable and I would refuse to let his unfounded territorial ways ruin my birth experience

The man who stepped up needs an award he’s a rare find and your ex knows that. Don’t alienate your support system hon stick to your bf like glue because he was there when he didn’t have to be. That sperm donor that impregnated you is just that: a sperm donor. He showed you the type of man he is and if I’ve learned nothing else in this life it’s that a man will show you who he is and when he does you need to believe him. As women we need to stop looking for potential and giving 2nd 3rd and millionth chances to these men who aren’t worthy. Tell SD that he can be in the waiting room. Your bf should continue holding you down through your labor (your ex should not be in there he waived that right). After you 3 (you,baby,& bf) are settled the SD should then be permitted to lay eyes on his child. Get a paternity test and an air tight court order in regards to child support and visitation. Don’t let your ex ruin the good relationship you have with your bf. Like I said some guys do that on purpose out of jealousy because they know the bf is a good man and that makes them feel insecure. If you take your ex back he’ll drop you so fast because his mission would be accomplished. Please don’t waste your time, energy, and emotions on your ex hon! Save it for your baby and bf (who sounds like he’s husband material ?)

Do what you feel is right screw our opinion, what kind of person jumps in and out of an unborn child's life? Will he be adequate? What has he done so far?? Like wishful thinking isn't enough in children's lives he gotta be solid. My dad is s*** ty he served little to no purpose and was added stress to me, my mom should have told him be stable or be out it hurt all of my siblings in the long run and we don't have a bond he's just the guy that was supposed to be there my stepfather is more my dad. Always been never made excuses comforted me when my dad neglected me and provides stability biology doesn't always matter

You should wait and see what happens when baby arrives, alot can change between now and then.

Tell him when the baby has arrived let him know your reasoning for sticking with the man who chose to support you in your time of need yoyo dads are the worst don't leave him out but make sure he earns A spot

I'm going through a similar situation but I agree with @nakers also. The father of my unborn child now wants to buy me things, spend time with me and also name the baby. Just the whole B.S. when he wanted nothing to do with this baby. Your boyfriend has been there since the beginning so do not allow this guy to ruin it for you because 9 of of 10 these men yo yo too much and he will most likely revert back and leave you hanging when things get hard.

Pray about it and make the decision with your head and not your heart ( meaning emotions) because trust me we all want the real father to be the one to be by our side but it may not always be the best scenario especially after he abandoned you in the beginning. Good luck Hon.

I agree with @nakers

Personally I would keep things the way they are until the baby is born. Let him be in the waiting room, and then set up visitation after he's born, but your current bf is your support system. Your ex had the choice and shouldn't just be granted what he wants because he carries the DNA. You gave him the chance, now he has to show he is going to be committed to this new life.

I agree with the previous comment... you should give him a chance. Some men just don’t feel like Father’s until the baby is here... you can message me if you want I had somewhat of a similar situation with my first baby.

I think he has the right to be apart of his baby's life and your bf should really understand he's the father. When I went through the same thing I was told my baby's dad should be in the room he's the dad but that part is totally up to you because giving birth you should be at peace and not stress or have to be put in an uncomfortable spot. I think unless your child's father is in and out of your child's life once baby's born you should give him a chance. He may have just been caught off guard and got scared. Hope everything works out for you and your precious baby