I haven't he time to read all the replies so forgive me if I'm repeating or something.

Firstly my 4 yr old has many symptoms of ADHD, I have only recently admitted that and started talking to professionals. He has a good structure at home, I've always ensured he has a healthy diet etc and we are actually really strict with him.

I am getting increasingly upset with people within our own family telling me that he's a naughty boy or that he just doesn't listen. Yes it's frustrating but believe me it's a million times more frustrating for us and especially for him.

There are times when he can concentrate, that doesn't mean there isn't a problem. There are times when he will go to bed nicely, eat without having a tantrum (he has sensory issues with food) there are even times when he will do something when he's asked the first time, none of this means there aren't issues there.

He is also worse when he's been somewhere and been given certain drinks, this doesn't mean that it is solely an issue with his diet, just that it makes things worse.

For the last year I've been terrified of him starting school this September and being labelled as 'the naughty boy', yes you have to treat everyone fairly and mostly the same but some children need extra support with things, if a child has dyslexia don't they have understanding and some 'special' treatment? Do the other children not get upset by this?

I wouldn't want to be a teacher for anything and have huge admiration and respect for them but when it comes to my child I hope against all hope that our teachers realise that he's not choosing to behave the way he does sometimes it is just how his brain works and we are all trying our best to help him work it out, it is however a long slog and the effort it requires from him sometimes is just too much.

We have adopted a wait and see approach as he is still very young and will be working with the school when he starts to see how we move forward but pieces like the quote at the top of this post do not help me see a future where he's going to fit in and I'm not going to have to battle every day for him.

So well said mrsmurf xxx

What a post.. My son is autistic he also has ADHD.. I've also in my last job worked specifically in these areas..

A diagnosis was important.. It's by no means a get out of jail free card and the actual post is shocking to me..

I could go on at length at the struggles children with ADHD face and how it impairs on their learning and their everyday living!

Teachers can be a big help during the diagnosis period, but they have to be trained. Otherwise they don't necessarily know what to look for. Teachers are a good source of information for the doctors because they are independent professionals who spend a significant amount of time with the child. We were lucky and my son's teachers had already been through the process with another little boy.

My son's autism isn't very noticeable, and you wouldn't necessarily think he had it, unless you know what to look for. If they had written a report saying he's an affectionate child, that behaves well in class and gives good eye contact. Then we might not have gotten the diagnosis. His teachers never said he had autism, or that they thought he had. But they noted how his speech is delayed, he has the vocabulary but he can't seem to get words into sentences. He doesn't understand social situations, he'll happily sit with you and smile at you. But you can't have a conversation with him and you can't have two way play with him. Plus loads of other little things that I didn't know were relevant like how he parrots language alot.

Teachers can make or break a diagnosis. Without it those families and children will struggle to get support and recognition. Before we had a diagnosis people would judge us, thinking we were labelling him or that we were looking for excuses. When we were just looking for help. Parents with 'normal' children think its okay to caste judgement because they see a child every now and again and they read about asd, adha or ocd etc on the Internet, so they think they are experts now. But you try living in that families shoes and im sure youll see a different picture.

See sister now has OCD really bad and her autism helper has not said they are linked that is very interesting.

First want to point out I've not read all replies!

I don't dispute the ADHD is a genuine condition, but I think some parents are quick to want a medical diagnosis for behavioural problems (emphasis on some) when a lot of the time the child in question is perfectly healthy and normal and just in need of a few more guidelines and boundaries. Incorrectly labelling a child is giving them an excuse and not necessarily helpful in the long run.

Just my two cents worth... x

Don't worry Hun I just though it didn't really sound like what I was trying to put across.

Your telling me my mum had to run around for ten years! And still coming back to my mum saying she don't have an exact thing its loads off things.

My mum works in child care and did a degree and the amount of children that even get a statement is next to nothing and that is so wrong so that means they get no help all them poor kids just sitting there struggling.

And then you get schools that only want kids with statements for the money and do offer support.

This happened to my sister at secondary school , but as for ADHD they had loads off help for that but because my sister didn't lash out they would just leave her when at home we would get the back lash and she would act up and we would know there is something up my sister though she was stupid and all these things at one point.

Yes I can't stand the labelling off a child , all because they need extra help then everyone else it's not right at all.

But there are positive cases and I thank the government for that u just wish there was more positive stories.

Miixedmaddness my comment wasn't specifically aimed towards you, just in general. I hear it ALOT, especially before we got the diagnosis.

I realise that adhd and asd are different, but they do come with similar stigmas. I know from talking to other parents that a middle class married couple are much more likely to be listened to than a working class single mum. Which is wrong. Training for teachers to handle children with asd and adhd is not compulsory and sketchy at best. Dispite 1 in 100 children being diagnosed with asd, (don't know the figures for adhd). I also nievely assumed that once he waa diagnosed he's get the support he needs. Wrong! We now have to apply for that too!

Im sure there are kids out there who are wrongly diagnosed or that don't have it. But there are also alot of legitimate cases too.

By the way I didn't mean autism is a label.

I mean people see someone who is just autistic or who has just got ADHD even things like dyslexia.

As soon as people hear you have been diagnosed with it they no longer see you as a person just a label (autism,ADHD) that is what is so wrong!

I completely agree girls are much harder to find out if the have autism my sister is proff off that she's had every single test and report you could get but only when going to university at 18/19 they now have found out she has autism.

My sister has behaviour problems but there things you wouldn't think were behaviour problems. And she has major difficulty in so many things.

Her report was heart breaking.

Thank you for the info mrssmurf.

We only know other children with autism that are boys and I know that girls are harder to diagnose but thats all my knowledge really on girls. Its good to hear from someone who knows about girls.

My gut instinct is I want to start the assesment, but after the conversation saying not to push for it Im was really quute confused. I didnt really want to wait until school age as I have heard very mixed thing about cahms who asses after 5.

Maybe ill try and speak to the paediatrician, due an appointment this month so maybe I can push as its really hard being in limbo as such. Xxx

My sister has been diagnosed with ADHD and my brother has asperges(a form of autism) and while i totally understand my brothers needs and differences, though routine and strict structure has practically changed his life, my sister is a different story.

Yes she is energetic, sometimes angry amd can be difficult. She is totally controlable. She behaves very differently for different people. She has never misbehaved for me because she knows i wont have it and i refuse to give her medication. Yes at 12 she still wants to run, skip, jump, sing everywhere and is hard work to keep track of thats just who she is. I dont expect too much from her and she behaves accordingly! My oh was told he had ADHD as a kid and was medicated. He hasnt taken them since he was about 14 and hes fine now. I think ADHD and autism are totally different things. I do believe that most (not all) kids with ADHD just need understanding and not medicating.

I am in no way slating anyones parenting or saying their children do or dont have ADHD and if they need medication or not.

Just my experience! X

Autism is different as well PP as routine can make a huge difference and sometimes an autistic child doesn't have any difficultly in the classroom and doesn't stand out unless interacting socially. X

PP in the situation I was taking about I'm 100% sure that child had no diagnosable behavioural issue. I taught him for a whole year and he was with me all day. He had absolutely no signs of ADHD but just came from a household of children with lots of needs and would act up for attention if he didn't like a certain teacher. The children I've taught with ADHD has been very obvious even when medicated. If a child has no issues behaviourally and can concentrate on tasks the same as their peers every day then I would struggle understanding how they can have ADHD x

He is extremely deluded and clearly has never lived with a child with ADHD. t*** ! There's a huge difference between having a child for a few hours and having them full time. He ought to try having a child that has disabilities as well as ADHD. Ha and he calls himself an educated man :-/

My wee cousin who just turned 9 has recently been diagnosed with it. My gran from my other side of the family was watching him one day and mentioned to my mum she thought he may have it as my gran is a mental health nurse. The teachers at his school also mentioned to my Aunty and uncle but they refused to accept it that was 2 gets ago. However things got worse and eventually they seen health professionals and with the support of his school he was diagnosed with ADHD. He takes medication i personally dont know what these tablet are for or do for him. He is like a different child now. Xxxxx

Can I just say its not a label but a diagnosis. Label has such negative connotations, I hate it. I haven't labeled my son he's been diagnosed with a legitimate medical condition. Im pretty sure if my son had muscular dystrophy people wouldn't say I've labelled him with that. (Thats just a physical disability that I plucked off the top of my head, im obviously not comparing the two.)

Sj34 whoever told you you're daughter has autism, but then not told you to get her diagnosed is not right. Girls are notoriously difficult to get diagnosed, and it gets harder to do the older they are. Girls tend to be more high functioning, but still have the same social problems as boys. I've spoken to a few parents with girls with autism and their diagnosis journey has been alot more difficult than ours. Honestly if I were you id get the ball rolling now. Its better to have a diagnosis now before it becomes an issue. My son's still in nursery so he doesn't seem that much different to the other children, however I know that once they get older he'll stand out more.

I agree that some children do genuinely suffer from symptoms but i also know a few children including family members whos parents pretend to health visitors and doctors on their day visits etc that this is the way their children eat all the time etc when it is not but in all fairness when its come down to the assessment part they have been caught out and not given the diagnosis and in fact parenting advice instead.

So i haven't experience it myself so i cant say it doesn't exist but my opinion is a lot of parents seek the diagnosis when the issue can lay with judging themselves a bit better but that is the same with many conditions so not really sure xx

It really worries me with a previous comment that says something like , theyre fine in my class so I know they dont have adhd.

My girlie now shes settled, 95percent of the time holds it together at nursery, shes even dealing with crying most of the time now as there is so much going on. The teachers have really listened to me and ive explained the ways they need to do things to help her accept change more! I do sometimes worry that they think i make it all up and she copes at school. When she leaves school is a different matter. Sometimes i cant even get her in the car, sometimes she holds it together until she gets home, sometimes until bedtime. Ive been more or less unofficial told that she has autism, however been told not to go for the diagnosis until later on.

I think this is mainly to do with they worry that she will be labelled with something and people wont try wih her. Shes such a clever little girlie. Her school has listened to me finally and came to me the other day and said, im so proud of her she can read! I said I know ive been saying for a while she reads at least 20 words plus days of the week and recognises most number up to 100.

Anyway, I know ive gone completely off topic but I really do worry that people think I make things up because she doesnt always show it. But believe me its hard work to help her cope with situations, give her enough routine and help her appear 'normal' (I use this term very loosely) . X x

As pp said autism a lot off the time gets mistaken for ADHD

There needs to be more research In most things.

Just being labeled something then not reviving no help for it is wrong!

I've never met a child with ADHD or know someone personally affected by it. However as some of you know, my son has autism. Which has had a similar reaction from people. It's a label, you just can't control him, he'll grow out of it etc. There are loads of parents who are told the same thing, its not autism it's your poor parenting. Then that child grows up and it diagnosed as an adult with asd. We are currently trying to apply for extra support for him. But at the end of the day it all comes down to money. What happens if Bradford council decide my son shouldn't get 1:1 support? Leave him at the back of the class to fall behind. What do you expect us as parents to do? It might not be fair for the other children to have a child with special needs in their class. But its not fair that my son has to live in a world he doesn't understand.

I haven't read it all.

But at school kids with ADHD OR ADD get so much help then there's kids that have no behaviour problems and are classed as 'good' and get no help but they have special needs or high needs. And the only way they think 'yh its time to help' is when kids act up.

But small minded people do need to open there eyes yes sometime schools and doctors are quick to put behaviour problems down to ADHD instead off putting actual work in to find out what it is , they tried to say my sister had it at one point but she dose not she has autism and that's after 19 years off having it.

Toggy, teaching is a bit like AP :-) you're right. You've got to have strong attachments with your pupils. Like Mamadimarco says if ADHD pupils, and pupils in general, like you they are more willing to work harder for you.

Mamadimarco - from what you are saying 'relationship/s' is the key word here. You said you were better behaved for some teachers because you wanted to 'please' them. That sounds promising. Like it can be self-controlled, if desired.

And I understand that teachers can't let kids with ADHD get away with things in school .i still punish my son the same as I would my youngest son .as otherwise he would think he can do what ever he wants and not get in trouble .

I had to go through a long proses with my son .had to fill out questionnaires on how he is at home .then the school had to fill out one .and surprise they was the same .they say a child who is good in school but not at home is not classed as having ADHD .but if home life and school life is the same then that's how they diagnose ADHD .but that is just part od the diagnoses .they come to your home and watch your child school and asses .

Unfortunately there are a lot of parents who do try to get their children diagnosed with something or other. I'm constantly filling out referral forms sent from the doctors explaining that the child in question is completely 'normal' in the school setting.

I work in quite a rough area and I question if their child is showing concerning behaviours at home or if they just want the extra benefits? It's awful to think that but I have witnessed parents give their children energy drinks and sweets on the playground when they know somebody is coming to observe their child.

I have taught many children with ADHD and for the most part the diagnosis was spot on but I've also witnessed children who are just 'naughty' being diagnosed. It annoys my when I know that they haven't got ADHD as they behaved fine in my class! X

I've said something similar for years. not that it's completely made up, but a lot use its label as an excuse.

I work with children, I'll give you an example...

We were running a parenting course for children with behavioural difficulties, parents went off with their tutors and we did our bit with the kids to tackle the issue from their end. The first day was hell. several staff got hurt, things were broken and you couldn't think for the noise half the time. by the end of the first week, the violence was gone and although still chaotic, there was a drastic improvement. by the end of six weeks, the transformation was astounding. calm quiet atmosphere, children engaged in activities, manners, no fighting, nothing. what had changed?? it was made abundantly clear that it would not be tolerated. change your language (the word no to these kids was like a trigger button, you say stop, or their name, or the action you'd rather they would be doing ie walking, quietly, nicely etc) change your attitude towards them (they're not 'the naughty kid' you know they can be well behaved, tell them that, see self full filling prophecy) engage then first in activities you know they will enjoy, build up their ability to sit and concentrate for longer periods, then once they've mastered being still you bring in the other stuff, you let them run around outside, regularly, do your teaching out there even, kids love learning outside, most do even without any difficulties. non of this don't run anywhere over the top health and safety, running is not dangerous, chill out.

I'm not saying that would work for everyone. but it worked for every one of the 20 children we worked with... that's not a bad result...

Before I start, I am not saying that I agree entirely with the biased original post but...

I think adhd is obviously a prevalent condition within children, however I do agree that sometimes it seems to be down to how they are brought up, especially in lower socio economic groups (well accustomed to these, working in poor areas of a Scottish city). In at least two of these particular areas, I regularly see parents impatiently wait on prescriptions for controlled drug medication for their kids, while ignoring their child's questions but shooting them down when they move slightly out of line. Makes me wonder if some positive attention would benefit them, rather than being shown that they'll get attention when they act out of line? I KNOW that medication is required in some cases but I don't know how far doctors actually go to confirm before writing the prescription...

Consistency is important. As a teacher, you can't come across as being hypocrytical. You need to gain your pupils trust and respect. As Toggy said you can't tell someone off for talking whilst letting an ADHD child off the hook for doing the same thing. The other pupils won't appreciate it either. It's just really difficult :-/

More adults in the classroom would help. This year I teach 29 children. I'm the only adult in the class. Even if I had all the training in the world it would be pretty difficult to be able to stand in front of a class of 30 and teach a child with ADHD.. I'm guessing? Smaller classrooms would help, more one-to-one support.

I had a report from my sins teacher saying he is disruptive in class and to other children .gave the report to the doctors who diagnosed him and they was really outraged about it .so they sent the school a letter saying the teachers should get training for this type of thing .which I think they should in all schools

Personally I think it's very hard to diagnose properly.

My step son 10yo (who lives with us full time) is currently being assessed. He has autism (diagnosed) and it is thought he has ADHD along side it.

He isn't the 'stereotyped' child with ADHD, if there one?! Doesn't appear badly behaved. - you can tell he really cannot help his behaviour/movements and just doesn't stop!

I think children can be 'labelled' wrongly as a excuse by parents but there are a lot of genuine cases.

I have recently claimed carers allowance for him - based on his ASD.

I agree Toggy, I only have 11 years of teaching under my belt but I have noticed that we do have different kind of leaners in our classrooms. Some kinesthetic learners find it difficult to sit still. Learners with learning difficulties will find it hard to focus on a task for the duration of the lesson and will benefit from having a series of shorter tasks. I guess if you know what works for your pupils then you can help eliminate these kind of problems. I had one child who was completely hyperactive during a language lesson but silent as a mouse in an art lesson. I haven't taught a child diagnosed with ADHD so I have not had the opportunity to learn how to use teaching tools that will enable them to learn.

Siany - Where does it say Daniel

ken has a young child? He is stating his opinion as a former teacher, unless you are referring to another post?

It is always people who dont have older children that have this kind of opinion on things like this ...... as if the child that they have now will be an angel when older !!

That must be difficult for you to cope with without any kind of support.

From the age of 3 my son was like this but it took loads of appointments school reports tests and other stuff to diagnose him

With ADHD he's now 9 and been diagnosed it for a year now .i don't get any help do it by myself not going to lie it is hard .people say he could be just a naughty child but it's not that kids with ADHD have other problems like can't concentrate can't keep still shouts out random stuff there is more to it than just a naughty child

Hmmm I couldnt actually bare to read it all! what a uneducated man! He has obviously never been affected closely by it! Diet, exercise can help manage symptoms, yes ... but it doesnt mean it does for everyone and it doesn't mean that it doesnt exist.

People believe that changing a diet of a child with autism can help the 'symtoms' , if u throw that in with making sure they get enough sensory input (trampolines, swings, running whatever helps the individual child) that can also help manage the symptoms, does that mean it doesnt exist.

I hate articles like this, its hard enough for parents to get people to understand their children without articles like this being written kindof making out that its their fault. Sorry, rant over :) :)

What a whole load of bollocks !!!

Emma glad you re-read it properly. I have only personally come across a few pupils who were disruptive to say the least but they had a few issues. I'm not saying it doesn't exist just because I personally haven't come across it. I like to keep my mind open about these kind of things and hopefully read what others think about the condition. Better still if they can share experiences with me. I guess I'm looking to be educated :-) one can always find something new to learn.

Allie I have just noticed that but like above said put something like this on expect a back lash .maybe not her words but people will have there opinions

Emma u can't have read any of that correctly if you think that is foulkys opinion.she said straight off that it's not and it is quite clear that it is someone else's words! So get your facts right ?

Sorry read it wrong .there is a lot going about at the moment about this .from people who probably have never dealt with it before

Emma are you referring to me? If so, then you are mistaken. The above article is Daniel Ken's opinion. He is a former teacher.

Also, I made it clear, 3 sentences in that it's not my opinion.

All of what you have said is your opinion yes .but my child gets enough sleep .does not play on computer games eats the right stuff .i don't claim benefits I work .he doesn't get help at school from people.so your opinion is yours but gets yours facts right first

Makes a lot of sense unfortunately...