Well to me family is most important so i without any question would open my house up to make sure they have a place to stay, fed and are safe.

Dh knows a lot of people is planning on talking to the owner of the apartments behind our store to see if they have any studio or 1 bedrooms within their price range.

We also know a few managers at a stores and see if they’re hiring for my brother. My brother is currently working but he went from working 40 hours a week down to only part time so he thinks they’re downsizing. He has put in applications to other places.

His gf/fiancé (not sure what she is lol) has 2 jobs. So she has income as well.

I know they’re desperate because I live far and it’ll be a drive to their work. I will be keeping on their butts and making sure they’re progressing with moving out. I’ll help them in any way but I won’t co-sign for a place for them. I need them to save as much as possible so they can move out as soon as possible lol.

❤️❤️

Do the girlfriend have a job? If she don’t, she would have to get one. Ain’t no way I’ll let another grown woman sit in my house all day doing nothing. But you are a great big sister. He’s lucky to have you ?

I’m sorry missed the part that he was that young. If he’s just a kid, has had a bad role model all of life, is a good kid and is not in the habit of taking advantage of your kindness, then yes totally I’d put him up. A “contract” notarized will probably not do much, to be honest. However, I think it’s amazing that your husband will take this opportunity to teach him things. If he’s never had that, this opportunity for him can be life changing. I hope he uses this as an opportunity to both grow and get back on his feet. Is he working? Can your husband mentor him in helping him find a job?

Also, make sure the day he moves in you lay the ground rules with his girlfriend, too.

Thanks @king! I appreciate those words.

I hope so too! Hopefully dh can show him some manly things lol.

You sound like an amazing sister. I'm sure you know him better than any of us ever could and if you feel that he will respect the fact you want him out in two weeks well then that's great. I hope things start to get better for him.

I appreciate the advice but I’m not paying for a hotel. We still need to buy things for the baby and we are buying big purchases for our home also.

He’s still young and has a lot of learning to do but I blame his dad and my mom for not making him responsible. He’s not childish, not disrespectful or a deadbeat.

Things get tough in life and he reached out to me and I can’t give him a cold shoulder. He’s never had a role model to show him the ropes.

He’s been slowly learning how his dad is. Unfortunately he’s very manipulative and a narcissist. Even though I warned him about his dad since our mom passed away he’s given his dad everything.

His adult life just started 2 years ago and our mom passed when he was a senior in high school so life has been tough on him these 2 years.

If he was some sort of druggie or alcoholic than things would be different with me but he’s a good kid and just needs family right now.

I would make him sign a contract with the timeframe explicitly noted, don’t give him keys, and lay ground rules (cook and clean for yourself, do your own laundry, etc) and notarize it. There are always posts about the deadbeat relative/friend who comes for a week and stays 3 years..

I’d pay for a hotel ? like an extended stay type place for 2 weeks. It will be more money, but it would conserve your relationship with him.

My BIL broke his lease and has bad credit, and he couldn’t get approved for another rental. So be prepared to co-sign for that crap like we just did. ? I seriously hate it when family members can’t get their lives together.

I think 2 weeks is generous.

Unfortunately the two times DH and I helped his family out (once his brother the other time his cousin) it got messy. With his brother it got to the point where his new girlfriend would be in and out whenever she wanted. He would even give her his key so she can come to the house to sit there and wait for him to get home from where ever he was at? DH and I had to break that lease in order to get them out. His cousin wasn’t as bad he just said he’d be there a month and turned into a year.

Good luck have everything in writing !!

Thanks for letting me know!! ❤️ I really appreciate the advice lol.

The only thing you can't legally do (after the 30 days) is change the front door locks and not provide him with a key. ? Because of the whole residency issue i started before.

I’m going to tell him about writing and signing it when he gets here later. And I really like the idea of the locks ??

Seriously it may not be much but write the start and end dates of your offer and EVERYONE sign it. In case there's trouble it's some sort of proof of your agreement.

Anything past 30 days and he can claim residency then you'd have to go through the legal process of eviction/ejection. $$$$

Orrr if it gets out of hand put a lock on the fridge and all the bathrooms and make his life hell until he leaves ? I've done this before.... And it worked wonders.

Dh said he doesn’t mind. He said family is family and if you can’t lean on family during hard times than we aren’t kind people. Lol

I just got off the phone with him and told him 2 weeks! I won’t let them have mail at my address either. I told them since it’s only for a short amount of time to only pay 50$ for electricity for those 2 weeks and help with food money if they’re eating whatever I make.

I can’t let my brother be homeless. I just can’t! We both lost our mom and his dad is a crappy person. We don’t have much family so I’m here for him. But that is with a TIME LIMIT! I made that very clear!!

A hotel is pricey! Plus if they stay with you how will they contribute? Two weeks should be ample amount of time to find a place so they should start looking now.

Letting my parents stay for two weeks turned into 6 months of hell! As long as they are VERY clear that it's only two weeks, it's very sweet of u.

If they were paying bills and rent on their place why can't they afford a hotel themselves?

Yea I mean if your husband is ok with him staying for 2 weeks then that should be enough time for them to find another place to stay. But make it very clear before he stays with U that he needs to be out by whatever date u give him!! U have a baby coming soon so adding 2 other adults to your house would be tough

I would talk to your hubby. Make it clear to your brother only 2 weeks otherwise things can get messy.

2 weeks should be enough for him to find another place.

I think 2 weeks is more than generous, but like you said, you have to make that deadline very clear before you let him move in.