my son cries when i put him down 90% of the time. even if im still in the room n he can see n hear me. i didn’t know babies could get spoiled this soon. how can i break him of this? just let him cry a while?
@lavender13, You’re welcome!! They say the first 3 months are some of the hardest (especially for us new moms who don’t know what to expect) and they are right! There were lots of times where I got so frustrated because I felt like I had so much to do and no time to do it. My girl wanted to be held all the time. She hated carriers, hated tummy time and hated being put down anywhere for any amount of time. A few times, I found myself getting so upset with her asking “why can’t you just lay here for two minutes while I wash a dish?!” and then, when she would finally fall asleep, I would break down crying wondering how I could ever be mad at my innocent little baby for just wanting to be close to me. It’s hard and it’s tiresome, but it’s so worth it. You can’t spoil them. Newborn stage will be over before you know it and soon you’ll look back wondering what the fuss was about 😉💕
Just remember that this stage WILL pass. Eventually, he will be able to entertain himself and no longer need you attached to him constantly. Soon enough, he will be trying to twist his way out of your arms so he can go play or pushing your face away when you try to give him kisses. But right now, he is still so brand new to this world and all he has ever known is you, your voice, your heartbeat and your warmth. Please don’t think you are spoiling your baby by soothing him and cuddling with him. He is not crying because he knows you will pick him up, he is crying because your arms are where he feels safe. The age where children learn how to manipulate you with their cries is still quite far away and even then, sometimes all a baby wants is their Momma to hold them. I’m 26 and still want mine to hold me 😭
Just like @mlynm90, said, lots of floor time with you on the floor with him. He will learn that he is okay being close to you without being held constantly but remember it takes time 💕 You got this!
So yes, daycare can be rough on a baby that is held all day. As someone who works in an infant room, this is absolutely a thing. BUT, as a mom who would have worn her kid all day if the sling was more comfortable, there is a happy medium, I think. I got down on the floor a LOT from pretty much week 1. I wasn't holding him then, as he was doing tummy time or playing under his gym, but I was there. Kinda made housework difficult, but I kept up as best I could. Even if that meant folding laundry on the floor of his room.
I really think all that floor time made us close, but not inseparable for daycare. He was (and still is) able to play independently for longer stretches of time than most kids. Also, I think all that tummy time helped him crawl at 6 months.
We currently have 2 babies that are held constantly at home in my class. Daycare is an adjustment, but not impossible! I find if they are fussing to be held, sometimes just giving them close face time is what they really need. Usually I'll try that first before picking them up.
Good luck!
Look up the "fourth trimester." There's research that shows that comforting baby in these early stages does NOT make a baby more dependent. It creates a greater sense of security that can actually make them more independent later 😊
@wafflespancakes, sometimes but wouldn’t that just make him more attached to me. im worried he wont do well when others babysit him or when he has to start daycare in a few months. he cant be held all day.
This is very normal at 2mos. At this age, babies are incapable of manipulating you and can't be spoiled. He's crying for a reason - he just wants the comfort of his mama. Have you tried babywearing?