How often does your SO offer you time to go and do something for yourself, or aside from that pay…

I’m a SAHM. He doesn’t offer. I say “I’m leaving” and walk out the door 🤷🏼‍♀️. I go to the gym everyday and have yoga or aerial most days of the week plus I get weekly massages. He doesn’t complain because why would he? He’s their dad too!

I don’t have an SO but I know that if I had one and I ever went to get my nails done he better not be complaining because I’m sure he does things for himself like go to the gym or with his friends to a bar so he better not be complaining about me getting my nails done.

I do whatever I want, whenever I want, lol. I get my lashes done every other week, microdermabrasion and chem peels once a month, and go to yoga 4 days a week. I never even think to ask. I just say I’m going to go to ______ and about when I’ll be back. No issues. 🤷🏼‍♀️ My husband is a homebody though, so maybe that’s why. I’m going to Vegas with some girl friends at the end of June for 5 days, and I went to Malibu in March with my bestie for 3 days. As long as he knows far in advance enough, then he just makes sure he works it into his schedule. I’m always telling him to go up to Seattle or down to orange county to visit friends, but he just isn’t much of a traveler. Would rather stay home.

Never! I'm a SAHM and money has been really tight but those rare occasions I do get out with friends he complains about it in an argument in the future. He says he helps me by taking our daughter in the living so I can sleep which in turn is just being a dad.

I work but my husband never offers times to go do something unless I have a bitch fit and start pointing out all his time away and the things he does for fun almost every weekend while I take care of the kids and house but even then I feel guilty and won't go. I do get my hair done every 3 months and a pedicure every 2 or 3 weeks and I go on a lunch break at work.

I’m a SAHM and I go get my lashes done twice a month, shopping, hair, gym, and whatever I want. We share a bank account and I do all the bills and budgeting. The only rule we have is to write it on the calendar and budget for it.

@jayraemama, @squishymommy1, @rina0215, @jennatess, @tribe.of.judah, @raquely, @chelleyb93, @jessicalaneee, @sboolay, omg I feel like an idiot. My SO has never paid for me to do any of that! In my dreams would I get my hair done once a year and I’m paying for it if so. He got me a 25$ gift certificate for a pedi on Valentine’s Day and I still haven’t used it because it’s so rare. Like I wanna get my hair done this upcoming Saturday (scared to ask because he’d just bitch about paying for it), I asked him if I could please get a few hours to myself because I literally NEVER do anything. Friends? None. Nights/days out even before pregnancy? None. All I get to do is nursing school and now I don’t work because I’m on leave but I was. I’m infuriated at the fact that he can so easily spend a couple grand on hunting land and shit like that, but I feel like I can’t even ask to go grocery shopping. To top it off, I KNOW he is planning on proposing this Saturday and I’m just thinking to myself.. do I really want to commit to something forever where I’m unappreciated? I can bust my ass all day everyday cleaning and cooking and everything else under the sun on top of school (which is a job in itself) and taking care of OUR child, and I don’t get recognition for it or appreciated. But let me not do the dishes one day and he takes a picture and sends it to his mama and says it won’t get done unless he does it... pissed is an understatement. Let me also throw in the fact that he goes to the gym every day, he golfs or does something else every weekend, etc.

@babyjjsmommy, that sounds like a really controlling relationship and very unhealthy.

Im a SAHM. My son will be 6months old on the 18th and i have Never been out alone since birth. My mom has kept him a handful of times so my husband and i could run a few errands. But never for longer than an hr.

@babyjjsmommy my husband doesn't understand me time either. He works as a sous chef so his hours are crazy unpredictable. I have had my 3 good girlfriend over because EVERYONE is saying how isolated I am. I don't have a car and granted I'm only 30 min away from family but he complains about that too. He'll start scream that he doesn't get "me time" because he's working and just comes home or on his days off but that's his choice not to have friends and he pushed all his family away. I feel like a damn prisoner in my house. He gets adult face to face conversation everyday and I'm waiting for my visitation rights to be granted.

He offers for me to take a nap or a bath lol- which is nice. Sometimes I get frustrated when he hangs out with his friends often and then he says if I want time all I have to do is ask. BUT any time I have with the 3 of us I was want to spend together. Or run a solo errand. We both work full time, so it can be hard. He never throws it in my face though.

@babyjjsmommy you need to have a sit down conversation about the way your feeling. Honestly you sound like you might end up resenting him in the long run and it would suck to get married and feel that way. I do understand where you're coming from my husband doesn't help at all around the house but if he made took pictures or involved others hed regret that. This is a life you two are building if he wants to get married it's time to cut mommy out (DH is a huge mama boy) it's hard trust me it took 5 years 1 of which we were married. It was a long hard tough battle and I fought tooth and nail to cut her out of our personal business and am much happier now that I have. It feels like I'm married to just him not his mom too.

You need time to yourself, most of my alone time is at work and I go through spurts where I just snap and I get a few hours to myself but that means maybe getting a pedicure or just going grocery shopping or to target alone. I don't do anything extravagant while he's watching the children like I wish I would, but everyone needs "me" time. I'm sure he gets plenty of it and he needs to help out.

Maybe try going grocery shopping alone and just staying gone longer?

@babyjjsmommy, communicate your feelings to him. If that doesn’t work suggest counseling until you both can be on the same page. Also, our kids are 6yrs and 12yrs. So me coming and going is not an issue. To all you mamas with young children. I promise it gets easier to come and go as the older they get. Date nights become easier as well. Just keep fighting for your marriage. Seek counseling if needed. Have kids on a schedule so you can have alone time with your partner. I still put my 12yr old to bed at 8pm. As long as you are not being physically/emotionally abused, keep working on your marriage.

I tell my husband sometimes when I'm going to grocery shop alone lol but if I'm like paying big money to get my hair done (like last month I did a purple bayalage $120!) I'll make sure he's cool with it. He's never thrown anything like that in my face he goes.out sometimes so why couldn't I?