Ask me if I didn't question life last week in Target when I thought I was gonna have to leave that…

Ask me if I didn't question life last week in Target when I thought I was gonna have to leave that dressing room with one boob hanging out and nothing but my granny panties and the ash I hauled in on my hairy legs on from the waist down.

I was trying on one of those dresses that tricks you by going on okay and then refusing to come off. I got it unzipped, got an arm halfway out and then it locked around my torso. I sweated myself into a tizzy bending over and trying to dislodge it from...