Lisa
starting_over39
Lisa·Мама троих детей

Omg please read* abused woman finally finding her voice (myself) scared to send but I know I need to 🙏🏽

Let me know what you think 😬

No argument please.. Since you text me the other day that I don't hold my word, or do what I say I'm going to do. I'm going to break it down for you. I need to be able to work all shifts like you are able to get up and go to work at anytime given to you because you know that I or Tiffany is going to care for our daughter. So this is how it's going to go. You are going to make your schedule around her Talianna your daughter. I have sacrificed been sick and have been her number one caregiver since she was born. I received sick benefits for duration of my pregnancy and maternity leave for an additional one year of 700+ dollars biweekly. So after I obtained employment I worked casual meaning my hours varied and are not guaranteed so very hard to budget with a casual position. In order for me to take a loan is risky because my income is not stable. You do not need to worry about her well being because I carry that responsibility alone, you wake up grab your lunch and start your shifts at anytime your employer tells you without hesitation. So now how about we reverse this. You figure out how you are going to get to work and start all wee hours of the morning or anytime that your employer wants and I will get up get dressed and go do double shifts and work however Ihow many ever hours. I will take my shifts without reservation and pay most bills in the house including mortgage effortlessly. Then how about i look down on you to catch up to me and get with the program. But I won't be a bully like you I believe you reap what you sow. This is my solemn declaration I Telisa (Lisa) state this letter of intent to you Devon (Richard) . So you no longer have to be fed up and blame me for not having enough funds you will now be the one responsible for getting our daughter to daycare or staying home or whatever you have to do. while I work 16-22 hour days. I won't be as mean as you and look down at you like a worthless human being, you'll do a great job all on your own because you have had tons of practice on me. No argument please I'm just keeping it real. I'm no longer stressing myself to find adequate childcare or have my child who is suppose to be studying herself watching our daughter for me to go to work. I had enough of your put downs long enough. I work 12:30-6:30 or 10:30-6:30 and I would like to earn more money and give more availability to my employer as this is a joint responsibility of parenting. I will pull my own and commit to paying and able to pay bills with my guarantee hours plus overtime for additional shifts that have now opened to me since you will be figuring out childcare for your schedule instead. Regardless if im living here or not. I will work like crazy and get up and go as I please to my work and gave adequate amount of time to rest as you do, eat shower and sleep. Now that's what I call even and only fair. So the problem is figured out I can push out and be a bread winner and you can base your work schedule around our daughter. I will look after her as my child still as im her mother but since I will end up working more than you it's fair to say that your income will drop significantly and you will be home more. Have a wonderful day my abuser. I'm taking my life back no more put down or insults. It's just that simple! Now the truth is writting. I love my kids enough to stand up for myself and stop walking on eggshell and trying to juggle by myself. Please don't spank Talianna as she is only 17 month old, be patient and play with her do her hair just be a dad as this is your chance to get it right seeing you weren't there for your other children. I'm entrusting you with her while I'm at work ok please this isn't a few hours or minutes.. Please no nasty messages as I'm being respectful and mindful and not rocking the boat. If you cuss me or say anything derogatory to me that's on you. No more hitting me with your fists or mouth texting my nasty voice messages. I know this was a shot in the dark as you love power too much and for me to make 27-32$ hourly working however I choose will not sit well with you because I'm being empowered and you will feel like the weaker link. Crossing my fingers you take it like a man only one could wish.

Sincerely,

Telisa

9

Лучший комментарий

neko86
Rebecka ·Мама дочки-младенца

This is what you were going through, and you still did all your amazing diy projects? Amazing. I hope he will read what you wrote in its entirety and let that sink in. Why do men have to feel so diminished just because they earn less than their partner, when they can focus on so many other aspects of life, such as setting an example to their children that it is not money that makes a mans worth, but their actions.

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meghan.brophy
meghan ·Мама сына (1 год)

Good for you for saying something and posting this. This will be super empowering for a lot of women. ❤️

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Комментарии

sherrynygirl

@starting_over39 ...If i lived anywhere nearby i would baby sit your little girl in a heartbeat! Your courageous Woman! I was in your shoes as a teen mom i allowed myself to be controlled &abused in many aways..If i could figure how to get the state at 21 yrs old to pay for my divorce &Granted Soul custody...I can help you! We all go thru lessons in life especially as women we feel so alone.In my situation i never let another man dare Put their hand on me ever again..(grateful i found a better man and had 2 other children.Your a mother warrior fearless.you put your families needs 1st.Girl Its Your time to Shine! The nursing skills you have are a gift to other's..SOME MEN DON'T LIKE INdependent woman..I make more money than my man i never throw it his face..i work hard and have a career not just a job..New year new you..You can do this! It kills us to leave our children no one nurtures them like a mother but...we the providers by choice we carry our households...Never look back..keep your self motivated to let your man see *Enough is Enough* and to keep his freakin hands to himself or this israeli girl will make a phone call for you haha just kidding Your a beautiful woman inside and out..Your man needs to step up now or never! Always here for you

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starting_over39
Lisa·Мама троих детей

Thank you so much much hun xoxo.. Taking it day be day thats all. I can do 🙌🏽 @smith0217

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smith0217
Candice·Мама двоих (1 год, 10 лет)

So sorry you are going through this Lisa, you are such a strong amazing woman. I hope there is a serious turn around for you and your family. So proud you were able to tell him exactly how you feel and demand respect, good for you ❤️

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neko86
Rebecka ·Мама дочки-младенца

This is what you were going through, and you still did all your amazing diy projects? Amazing. I hope he will read what you wrote in its entirety and let that sink in. Why do men have to feel so diminished just because they earn less than their partner, when they can focus on so many other aspects of life, such as setting an example to their children that it is not money that makes a mans worth, but their actions.

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ev14
Celena·Мама двоих (1 год, 3 года)

Oh Lisa, I’m so sorry you’re going through this. Good for you for defending yourself against him & putting your foot down. Big hugs!!!! I wish nothing but the best for you & your children ❤️

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nullnvoid

God sees all and will always make a way for u and the kiddies.

He can't reply cuz he can't even begin to imagine doing it. Not everyone is a superhero

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starting_over39
Lisa·Мама троих детей

Thank you so much 😘.. Yeah it's not easy but I know God is all seeing and my children and I will survive despite the odds. @sharlet002

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sharlet002
Shirley·Мама сына-младенца

Wow! I am speechless at your situation and happy for your strength level. I wish you God's grace and wisdom always.

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starting_over39
Lisa·Мама троих детей

Exactly he needs to step up and take responsibility for her well being since I don't do enough let's see him go to work at 12:30, 2:30 or 7am and work 16-22hrs and go overnight to Ottawa. Let's see him do it while I work 16 hrs and take all different shifts while he watch her or find someone to. He can't even reply and. I don't care what he has to say honestly @pnutbutta

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nullnvoid

Good luck. Sorry that your marriage had gotten to this point. His attitude and behaviour ain't cute. Your daughters and children also do not have to grow up in this type of environment. He needs to get it together

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meghan.brophy
meghan ·Мама сына (1 год)

Good for you for saying something and posting this. This will be super empowering for a lot of women. ❤️

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starting_over39
Lisa·Мама троих детей

@pnutbutta @pnkbuttafly234 thank you ladies 😘 truly appreciate all feed back. I sent it to him after tweaking it for legal purposes. I tired of being the one who gets frowned upon and treated less than when he feels like it especially under stress..he is allowed to make the money because I'm the one caring for the children so he can earn without distractions. Screw that! Let's flip and lets reverse the roles. He has a rude awakening. I will work x amount of hours and he will worry about her childcare etc and see how that affects his finances the big strong tough guy. Close to 27.00$ hourly I make and if I work overtime it's $32.00. They have asked me so many times but I say no because of my little one. Now let's see how he copes, he hasn't replied yet but I know his brain is going overtime pondering if I'm really going to do this.

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starting_over39
Lisa·Мама троих детей

I'm at my breaking point now.. He is jealous that my salary is more than his even though he brings home good money.. 6000$ roughly a month.. He is so narcissistic its unbelievable me. When hes not under pressure he is pretty good but man oh man when it gets tight it gets rough. He expects so much from me and yet he does nothing to help but complain and I'm so fed up. He needs to strap up or ship out. I need to get some more legal advice before I make any rash decisions @brynsmommie @eryka616

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del_1531404192_vt38

Wow

I absolutely love this!!! I think most woman go

Through this as we aren’t the bread winners but we are the ones taking care of our babies . They just pick up and go not

A care in the world who’s going to watch our babies. Great job. We have a lot in common.

As for him hurting you physically I don’t like that at all

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nullnvoid

Hopefully your letter opens his eyes and he reads and takes this in. We do a lot as mothers...we make it look easy.

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nullnvoid

Wow! Proud of u mama!

I know it must be scary to write and give him this letter but u are such a strong woman,I'm also not surprised. A lot of woman would be scared to do this. I applaud you and thank you for sharing this with us.

Because you have written I know that you already know your worth and know that you do not deserve such behavior...no one does. Even while working crazy hours you try to still do great by your kids by saving money and showing them your love and creativeness.

You have your health to think of as well on top of this childish bullying behavior.

Thank you for being a strong mother and sharing your story with us. Xo

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eryka616
Eryka·Мама дочки (1 год)

I’m so sorry you’re going through this💔

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brynsmommie
Amber·Мама двоих (1 год, 5 лет)

Omg Lisa I can’t believe this has been going on at home for you!!! You said what needed to be said and I really hope that this helps him see things from your eyes!

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starting_over39
Lisa·Мама троих детей

Thanks 💯 hun.. I appreciate it. I'm sure he won't do it but I want him to know I know what he's doing. Deep down he is jealous because I make more money hourly than him but he makes more than me because he can work more hours given his availability. But trys to guilt trip me and make me feel bad because I don't work as much I didnt have seniority. Now I just got a permanent part time line so I will have guaranteed hours starting a week from today and get more shifts on top of it because I'm in a higher pool. I had to eat alot of shyt from him but I can't swallow anymore. Why should I worry about childcare alone and trying to save the bit of money I make because it would be pointless. He's narcissistic that's what it boils down to but thank God above and my guardian angels that are opening doors for me @sabby

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starting_over39
Lisa·Мама троих детей

What can't you see hun? @mckenziesmummy

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mummyto2boys
Lauren·Мама сына (1 год), беременна (16 нед.)

I can't see it xx

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