@missashleyanne she lives in another country. Moved there for IVF treatment.

This is what I sent her...

Dear ****,

We wanted you to be the first to know that Family L**** are expanding, we are due in September 2018. We know that you and **** have been trying for a long time and though we admit we don't understand fully what you're going through, we want you to know that we care about you deeply and want to be there for you.

It has taken us just over a year to fall pregnant and although can't grasp your pain we hope you can accept our excitment. We are excited to share our news but thought we would write to you first to give you the chance to digest the news before we tell everyone.

We are still here for you with open arms and listening ears. If we talk too much about it please do say as we would never want to poke your pain.

Lots of love xx

Thanks everyone. I sent her a beautiful message this morning...

I was in the same boat when I fell pregnant 2nd time. My friend had been trying for 4years. I didn't send a letter as we don't really do that. I agree not doing it in person. I knew she'd be happy for us in the long run but I knew she'd be upset and didn't wanna force her into trying to smile through it. I sent her a message. I didn't write a massive essay. Was updating her about a few general things & just added it in that my husband & I were expecting our 2nd on such and such date. Hoped she was well and asked her what she'd been up to recently.

We've been friends for over 26years but since I've moved we don't see each other as often. I know her and knew she wouldn't want a massive heart felt story about how I was pregnant and hoped she was ok with it. She said after she was thankful I didn't make a big deal about it to her face. She opened up to me after how upset she was getting with all her friends making baby announcements every other week. I put it off telling her for a long time!