I know the decision comes down to what I want, but I’d like some opinions. I was planning on giving my child my last name, whether it’s a boy or girl. My ex is BEGGING me to give the baby his last name if it’s a boy because he wants his some to “carry the family name.” I’m not planning on giving him a second chance after the first trimester he ruined for me. (I wasn’t able to enjoy my pregnancy and he kept me stressed the entire time.)
Since I won’t be with the dad no matter what, should I give the baby my last name no matter what the gender is?
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- My fiancé recently broke up with me, he doesn’t want kids.. I’m changing my name to my mother’s maiden name, and that’s the name my son will have .. ultimately it is up for you. There is no wrong answer. But for me it’s important my kids share the same name as myself ..
I’ve already made the decision to not put him on birth certificate.
@swdemopulos1, in that case I’d say no I wouldn’t give the baby his name.
He can still fight for rights & take the baby if he’s on the birth certificate but I wouldn’t give the baby his name if he’s that way
Do what's right, and to me it sounds like you've already made up your mind, personally, I gave my oldest son his father's last name and have regretted it since the day I did it, his father's never been there for him, no Christmas presents, no birthday presents, no phone calls or emails or Facebook, jacka$$ actually blocked my whole family the day I had him... my oldest Son, Aiden is now 10 years old and knows of the man who "donated his sperm" but never met him. I hope this helps you, just remember not all men are the same and he may be a good dad, but generally how they are during the pregnancy is how they will be after the pregnancy
If you aren't married the child should have your last name. No matter if he is providing or not . That's my opinion.the last name shouldn't make him stop providing for his child
Thank you all for your input. You all helped me a lot!
@mamaofacountryboy, you’re right. Also, his daughter has his last name, he’s always threatening to take her away from her mom. She’s a great mom too! I became friends with her after while. Thank you for your help!
I agree with the ladies. If he’s involved in the pregnancy/child and is a good father then give him the last name. If he’s a deadbeat dad then nope. Give the baby your last name. Your the mom you have the right to do what is best for you and the baby
@swdemopulos1 no don't feel pressured or obligated. Its your right, your decision. You're the mom. If he wants to prove himself and y'all get married then may be you can consider it in the future....but now would not be a good idea.
@juliaschade41, that’s exactly what my mom’s been telling me. She regrets giving my sister and brother their dads last name. She only did it because she felt obligated.
@swdemopulos1 give the baby your last name. If you're already feeling this way and you give the baby his last name, he has rights to the child that you might regret later on. Y'all aren't married so there is no obligation for the baby to have his last name. Do what's best for the child not the father. Its the child's future and well being you need to look after, not what a man wants.
@swdemopulos1, you know him best. My SO when we split up for awhile he was still there for our son & getting him what he needed my BFF soon to be x-husband isn’t around he’s to busy cheating to even see his kids.
I don’t know yalls situation so you just have to trust your gut on this one.
You don’t want to give him the name & he’s never around to even know who his father is but same sense if he’ll be a great father there’s no hurt & letting him have the name
@rach.robinson and @scx327, we find out the gender in less than 2 weeks and I’m dreading telling him no if I end up having a boy. I hate confrontation!
@mamaofacountryboy, that’s the part that stumps me. He has a 3-year-old daughter with his ex-girlfriend and he’s more invested in this phone than his own child. He didn’t even have a job for the last two years of her life. I am the reason he finally got a job...
I say if the daddy is involved in the baby’s life then go ahead & give it to the baby. But if he will be the type to be in or out of the baby’s life not helping you raise him/her is give the baby your name
Yeah I feel like you should give your baby your last name, no matter how much he begs and pleads(:
Yesterday I went out with my boyfriend went to watch a movie, me and him don't live together yet. but point is yesterday when he was dropping me off his like sleep over at my house witch the mom and dad lives. I said no,
his response was why is everyone deciding or making choices for you and their going to do the same with the baby, when I know that's not true. what he thinks is that my mom tells me not to sleep over. So he left all mad. and I felt in my heart that he went on and cheated on me...
Am I wrong for telling my Bd that because we not Married my baby don't have to have his last name? He really got mad and told me I was project n ignorant. Crazy part is I was thinking about giving my baby his middle and last name
My boyfriend is so upset that I didn’t give our son his last name but I have 4 other kids that has my last name I didn’t want to make him the only one with a different last name. Is that selfish of me? Or should he just understand. We not married
Last Name
Any single mothers give or plan to give their baby their own last name? The father seems to be up and down about whether he is going to be involved further than just a paycheck so I kind of think it would be more appropriate to give baby my own last name. Thoughts?
yes I'm a single mom and yes my daughter is going to have my last name I refuse to give my daughter the name of a BOY who doesnt want to take care of his responsibilities! ....problem ?
UPDATE!!!
I called him and let him know it was bothering me that he was wanting the baby to have his last name even though I’m the one going through the pregnancy, labor, etc.
He understood and didn’t fight me in it. The baby is officially getting my name! 😊