U should file for assistance then

Sorry for the late reply! The fact that you are concerned with what kind of mother you are gonna be is already proof you are on the right track. Yeah, it definitely sucks not being able to give our children what is expected to be the "norm" but I've always tried to tell myself that down the road, my babies are not going to care whether or not they had a nursery or lots of toys. They are only going to care about how much you love them. How much effort you put in to keep a roof over their head, and food in their stomachs and clothes on their back. That's what matters. I understand the healthy food issue. Healthy food is just way to expensive! Not gonna lie, my kids have had McDonald's, or just food that I can throw in the microwave real quick more than I would like but they are fed so that's what is important. You got this momma! It will work out for the best!

Also on another note, maybe some one can throw you a baby shower? A family member or family friend?

I hate to hear that you are also going through this situation. Discouraging is a perfect word. Maybe because im a perfectionist or because im already scared im going to be a shit mother like mine was, this situation just kills my courage because it makes me feel like im already a bad mother. I cant give my child their own nursery. I cant afford a baby shower, a gender reveal party, i cant even afford to buy healthy foods. All this stuff that people get to have that have money and can have a stress free pregnancy and life. Its been crushing me. That my kid has to grow up kind of like how i did, without alot of money. Barely comfortable. It just breaks your spirit. It breaks mine at least.

In a very similar situation...my hubby and I have been living with my parents since May and cant seem to get back on our feet no matter what we do. Baby is due in a few more weeks and we don't even have a place to call ours. It's very discouraging... I hope you and your boyfriend get your break. Sending positive thoughts your way.