Another copy/paste from my husband. It was a rough morning visit. He can't come visit anytime now. We were already planning visits around her feeding schedule, but now he can't visit anytime like I can.

***Please, please, please DO NOT do not tell me how grateful I should be or "At least...". I know how grateful I should be and am. It doesn't help. It only makes me feel like an asshole and that I'm not allowed to be sad for my situation. Yes, someone somewhere has it worse, but this is my situation and I would NEVER make someone else feel like their situation doesn't suck***

Two weeks today! The days drag on, but in hindsight, it feels like one week was only a few days ago.

I returned to work today, opting to use my 6 weeks of parental leave only once Olivia is actually home and under our care. She won't know the difference if I visit in the morning and evening with work in between, or with home in between. But this morning hit me hard when I had to leave her (and Michelle) to head to work. It's hard to stay strong all the time. I just want our baby to be home.

Her feedings fluctuate, and she frequently shows cues for the bottle, but falls asleep after only drinking a bit. There are still times (about 50%) that she shows no cues and they just use the tube for the whole feeding. This will be the slowest process, building strength to always take all her food from the bottle. Progress will wax and wane for a while.

Soon, baby girl. Soon. But only when you're ready.