My mom is about to piss me off. She is mad at me bc I asked her to officiate our handfasting…

My mom is about to piss me off. She is mad at me bc I asked her to officiate our handfasting ceremony after the baby is here. Well she took it and ran with it. She wrote a 9 page sermon that talks about ring vows, marriage vows, and all kinds of shit. 1. This isn't a wedding. 2. We aren't exchanging rings. 3. We want it small and simple not 9 pages of crap that doesn't pertain to us. 4. All I want is a handfasting ceremony where myself​, my wife, and our kids are all fastened together after the baby is born to signify us as a complete family tied together forever. Why is that so hard for her to understand? Like she is even Wiccan so why is this hard?