So my daughters father is filing for full custody and I'm livid. At first he claimed he was just getting our visitation…

@kitcatmeow8383, he didn't even tell me, the notice I got in the mail from the juvenile court did. He's been acting like everything is fine and dandy. But that's great to know. I've been taking care of her since day 1 while he missed her birth, showed up high and then disappeared for almost 6 months then jumped back in her life and thinks he's dad of the year.

Unless he has proof you don't have a stable home, income and able to support your child he will never get full custody

@beebaby, well I'm not working because I'm pregnant but I have a savings that I use and I receive back child support from my dad that my mom was granted so it's all savings pretty much for right now which is more than enough to take care of her like I've been doing.

They usually rule in the mothers favor unless there's a reason of proof of neglect in all this other stuff I would definitely get a lawyer and try and get a note from the doctor saying you take your baby to drs appointment it's you that showing up not him there's no signs of abuse or neglect that she can see and have her leave her contact information and if you can provide evidence of his drug use they will test him and probably you so long as you pass every time he should either get 50/50 or just visitation in he isn't passing his test if he doesn't pass test court may suggest supervised visits

Most likely he will get visitation and ull have primary. Its rare when a judge takes full custody away from a parent.

@mommysbabies, idk how I would prove his drug use but I know he smokes weed for a fact. But I'm def looking into getting a lawyer now because there's no way I'm going down without a fight. If this is how he wants things to be. Since he came back into her life I have done nothing but work with him, giving him as many days as he requested. Making things equal so this is a slap in the face

@laciemarie, yeah that's how it is now, but I assume it's not good enough for him

From what i learned is its all about what you can prove. Gather any evidence against him that u can.

Yeah just tell the lawyer my sister in laws sons father tries to do this all the time because he doesn't want to pay child support and she always wins

@laciemarie, okay I will try, thanks everyone! @mommysbabies, @beebaby, @kitcatmeow8383,

So who supports you?

I'd definitely talk to your dr if he hasn't been to an appointment that may help you too

@beebaby, myself primarily. I lived in my own place for almost 6 months then my mom got sick and I moved back home and she watched my daughter while I worked and helped with bills. Now she's better and is able to work and pay the major bills. But I pay the electric, car note, insurance, and buy groceries. I pay for all of my things and my daughters as well.

@mommysbabies, he goes to her doctors appointments and has taken her to the doctor when she's been sick. He's not a bad dad, he's actually a really good dad but idk why he wouldn't just file for shared custody instead of full.

There is no way unless you are an unfit mother.

Yeah maybe he wants child support

Or is afraid you will

@mommysbabies, he's already on cs. He pressured me for a paternity test while I was STILL PREGNANT because he didn't believe it was his. An when she was born he didn't even bother to get it done he just disappeared for almost 6 months so I got it done and they automatically put him in cs. He was pissed, he says all kinds of nasty things about me indirectly on fb because he's on it.

@kaseyjazmine, very far from that, my daughter has everything and anything she needs. 😊

Take pictures of those also only communicate threw texts or Facebook so you have visual proof and keep it that's what my mother in law did when she had custody of my niece because the dads family were always threatening them but they never wanted to help when my mother in law needed them but they had custody with her

Yeah. He can sit there and keep on wishful thinking.

@mommysbabies, yeah I already have some screenshots of stuff he has said. Example A

@kaseyjazmine, lmfao right. He's crazy but that's okay because 2 can play this game.

Wow no child support is to support the child not the mom it's so you both are responsible for half of the child's needs this explains exactly why he did what he did he is bitter he is put on child support

@mommysbabies, exactly!! His cs goes towards anything for her, but most of the time I still end up buying most of her stuff. He's spiteful and bitter like you said

Just keep it all my sil sperm donor keeps asking her to send him the child support back after he pays it so it looks like he is paying it she keeps telling him to pound sand i have my reasons of not liking him my nephew was really sick as a baby and we went to their house he was laying on couch and nephew was laying there crying and my sil asked him to pick him up so she could finish eating and what did this mf do threw a blanket over my nephews face and he was only like three months old like are you kidding me after that day I stopped giving him the benefit of the doubt

I went through the same thing with my daughters father and in order for him to get full custody he has to prove that your unfit to take care of her.

@katelinjewell, well good luck to him, that's never going to happen!

@katelinjewell, how did it end with you all

He got visitations 2 days a week for 3 hours and Sunday for 8 hours but she has to be home at the time the judge said or I call the cops.

@katelinjewell, wow really?? I wish I could get that 😅, but my daughters dad is a good dad and they would more than likely give us 50/50

Yeah. As long as you can prove you have a stable living environment they won't take her away. Especially not at this point if your record is clean. They won't take a child from a ideal environment. He has to prove you unfit and can't do that unless he has proof. Can't just say you are.

@beebaby, well thank you, I feel much better hearing all this positive feedback ❤❤

Yeah. A mother has to be pretty bad off for a father to get full parental rights.

Ok your going to need all the fb posts your going to need to get a lawyer and express your issues. They will ask if you have concerns of drug use at that time tell them yes they will request a court order for a urin analysis they try to put Blame on you and ask why you let you're child around him knowing he does smoke weed. That's when you tell them you just want what's in the best interest for your child and seeing her dad and having him in her life is where you find it important as you have let him have her when he asks. Don't make a big deal to him about the papers you received just continue to let him see her and keep documents of when she sees him how long he keeps her and if she comes back just as you sent her. It doesn't matter that you live in the same house as your mom but try to get documents of your savings and how much you pay and live off of. Keep receipts of everything you purchase for her and everything he purchases for her to show who takes care of all her needs. Because not only will this be court for custody but also support.

@jessica.deshields, okay thank you for all that great advice!! I'll start documenting everything and get prepared. This was really helpful.