Мамлайф
Мамлайф
Приложение для мам
Joly
Joly
Мама сына-младенца

Seen this post on fb any thoughts?

Seen this post on fb any thoughts?

MY CHILD IS NOT REQUIRED TO SHARE WITH YOURS.

As soon as we walked in the park, Carson was approached by at least 6 boys, all at once demanding that he share his transformer, Minecraft figure, and truck. He was visibly overwhelmed and clutched them to his chest as the boys reached for them. He looked at me.

"You can tell them no, Carson," I said. "Just say no. You don't have to say anything else."

Of course, as soon as he said no, the boys ran to tattle to me that he was not sharing. I said, "He doesn't have to share with you. He said no. If he wants to share, he will."

That got me some dirty looks from other parents. Here is the thing though:

If I, an adult, walked into the park eating a sandwich, am I required to share my sandwich with strangers in the park? No!

Would any well-mannered adult, a stranger, reach out to help themselves to my sandwich, and get huffy if I pulled it away? No again.

So really, while you're giving me dirty looks, presumably thinking my son and I are rude, whose manners are lacking here? The person reluctant to give his 3 toys away to 6 strangers, or the 6 strangers demanding to be given something that doesn't belong to them, even when the owner is obviously uncomfortable?

The goal is to teach our children how to function as adults. While I do know some adults who clearly never learned how to share as children, I know far more who don't know how to say no to people, or how to set boundaries, or how to practice self-care. Myself included.

In any case, Carson only brought the toys to share with my friend's little girl, who we were meeting at the park. He only didn't want to share with the greedy boys because he was excited to surprise her with them.

The next time your snowflake runs to you, upset that another child isn't sharing, please remember that we don't live in a world where it's conducive to give up everything you have to anyone just because they said so, and I'm not going to teach my kid that that's the way it works👌

7

Комментарии

momzillaof5

Lacie MarieМама сына (3 года), беременна (13 нед.)

I love this post. Yes i belive a child should share to a point. I dont require my son to share with strangers. Hes tought not to talk to strangers, so why would i make him share his stuff with them? But if its a child he knows and hes just being selfish thats tottally differnt.

Ответить

turnturnsip

Tiffany W.Мама двоих (1 год, 3 года)

I also wanted to mention that the other side of that is if my kid goes up to another and is the one asking to play with their toy then it's a good learning experience that sometimes the answer is "No" and to respect that. There is no harm is asking, just be prepared that the answer might not be the one you want 😋

Ответить

turnturnsip

Tiffany W.Мама двоих (1 год, 3 года)

I agree that my kids don't have to share in that situation. These kids are strangers that obviously feel entitled (tattling) rather than just seeing if it's alright and just dropping it. I always encourage my son to vocalize when a situation makes him uncomfortable. Sharing can still be taught, this doesn't negate sharing. Once he/we get familiar with another kid and are playing together I'd suggest sharing his toys. That said, my 3yr old just started being ok with handing toys he was playing with to my 1yr old. Just yesterday. Prior to this breakthrough he tried to find some other toy he wasn't currently playing with to compromise. But to each their own..

Ответить

red_carr

Lauren🖤Мама дочки-младенца, беременна (8 нед.)

I agree with her. Now siblings should share or cousins but not strangers at a park..

Ответить

2016stacys

Amber J. StacyМама троих детей

Personally I agree with whoever wrote this because I'd like to instill in my child that it is okay to say NO. I do not want people thinking it's okay to force her to do anything she doesn't want to do. She should be able to share when she wants to and say no when she doesn't. It's not rude or unkind to say no it's her basic human right. She shouldn't have to leave her toys at home because she doesn't want anyone else to play with them or it's not fair that no one else has a toy. It's her belonging and not her fault another child doesn't have their own toys.

Ответить

j.vmommy

JolyМама сына-младенца

I feel the same way ashleywilliams1839 and yes I would have just kept the toys at home or invited the lil girl to play with him at home n then maybe go to the park if had the time shann

Ответить

shannwoww83

ShannonМама троих детей

Yeah I wouldn't have either they could be broke or stolen either way you go it can start arguements, after a certain age I agree but with toddlers I feel its important but as they get older I see where its important to teach them they dont have to but I may have kept them put up until the at date started as to avoid that or at least try to but this was well written.

Ответить

Yesterday I went out with my boyfriend went to watch a movie, me and him don't live together yet. but point is yesterday…

Yesterday I went out with my boyfriend went to watch a movie, me and him don't live together yet. but point is yesterday when he was dropping me off his like sleep over at my house witch the mom and dad lives. I said no, his response was why is everyone deciding or making choices for you and their going to do the same with the baby, when I know that's not true. what he thinks is that my mom tells me not to sleep over. So he left all mad. and I felt in my heart that he went on and cheated on me and did something else with an other girl.... and it's 10:51 am now and he hasn't texted me at all. and after he dropped me off I texted him saying what I felt and nothing. I don't know if I'm over reacting or what or what should i do. do i wait until he text me?

My son just handed me this…. As an adult I made the decision not to get it and told him why I choose not to. Asked him…

My son just handed me this…. As an adult I made the decision not to get it and told him why I choose not to. Asked him if he knew anything about COVID or the vaccine and he said no all he knows it’s that it’s out there. At the end I asked him if he wants the vaccine I will sign the form if not we ignore it. He said no thank you 😊.

What's your baby's name? How did you find it and what does it mean?

What's your baby's name? How did you find it and what does it mean? Let's share our #babynames ideas and inspirations. Post your baby's name on the main feed with a photo! It can be a bump or baby pic! Please add the hashtag #babynames so we can read them all 👶🏻 Can't wait to see them all ❤ Share with your mom friends so they can join mom.life and post their #babynames 👶

Would you consider this cheating? What would you do

Would you consider this cheating? What would you do I need advice from a neutral stand point. Genuine advice of what you would do. Ds had his tonsils out last night. For some reason my gut about dh was not good. At night I logged into his Snapchat and saw he was talking to an old friend who he had a thing with. Last thing I was able to see was him saying it was hard to not log into those pictures and she then said she couldn't answer the phone because she was with her husband. I texted dh and asked what pictures was it so hard for him to not look at and I guess he called her and they talked. And she supposedly came clean to me and said they would just talk and vent about what stresses them. Dh said the same thing and I guess the pictures were of them from a long time ago of them and other friends hanging out. Dh started crying saying he never meant anything that everything looked like the perfect crime but that there was nothing there. I have since kept my distance and told him to give me space. At the moment I don't want to see him. I believe what they said but I'm so hurt and I don't want to be the stupid person to believe everything.