If you are going through this alone, I am proud of you. Especially if you are doing it unwilling it.…

If you are going through this alone, I am proud of you. Especially if you are doing it unwilling it. If you need someone to talk too I'm here because I will understand. I know it's hard when no one understands because they've never been through it. Even single moms don't understand because they were single after giving birth. Here my story. A little about me and my pregnancy. I was at a friends house, not only a friend but a very old very well friend. Our moms have been best friends since third grade. They would joke that we would get married and have kids together since we are less than a year apart. Well on Thanksgiving he convinced me to drive him home, after that we watched some movies and he kissed me as I kissed back I stopped myself and asked if he was still dating his girlfriend that lived in Austin. He told me no that the distance tore them apart. He didn't have feelings for her like that again. Then he continued to kiss me, again I stopped him. I convinced him that it was not a good idea in case they ever got back together because she's always hated me. We finished our movie, and weren't even cuddling just hanging out. Then he started to rub my thigh, kiss on my neck, he would not stop. I kept asking him too because it felt wrong even thought it felt right at the same time. After about 20-30 minutes I gave in. We had sex, I don't think a condom ever got brought up we were just in the moment. Emotions were running high, and we were not thinking about anything. Well come to find out months later I'm pregnant now I was in a relationship when this encounter happened BUT it was an open relationship at the time. I did not and have never cheated, that is not me. I found out my 15 weeks and 5 days pregnant. I asked the doctor when she thinks conception date was and it was late November. Knowing what my mom and I knew we waited a couple of days and talked to his dad first, that's when we find out he was not single and lied to me. That's when I felt awful I knew I should've listened to my gut feeling. A couple of days later we ended up telling the guy and his mom. They both freaked out, and his girlfriend of 7 years broke up with him, moved out of their house and back in with her mom. They had just moved in together the week before. He told me he wanted a DNA test and I told him I was 100% okay with that but no needles were going through my belly. We can do the blood test but he would be paying for it because it's no matter what my child. After a couple of days he cusses me out and blocked me on everything. He told his parents he will not be doing a DNA test because he wants nothing to do with the baby period. He says his entire life if ruined and he wants to die because he lost the love of his life but not once has he thought about my life or even asked how I felt. My life is turned upside down and all that matters to him is that he lost his girlfriend because he chose to cheat on her. He told his parents I said I had cancer and couldn't get pregnant which never happened at all. I would never do that. He also says I practically forced him to sleep with me because he didn't want too without a common or any form of protection. He is saying is all my fault and he has no fault at all. He's making me the bad guy while he sits at home getting stoned all day and drunk all night. He's 22 and is acting like a 16 year old. My boyfriend is supporting me and is helping me and is actually vey excited he calls me every night and talks to my belly through the phone and kisses her goodnight. But I am going through this alone because he lives 3 1/2 hours away right now he will be will be back soon probably mid April but for sure sometime in April we just don't know when. Regardless I am going through this pregnancy all alone because none of my friends none of my family no one knows this feeling. Even if her dad doesn't want to be with me which is fine because I don't want to be with him I still would like that help the support and at least him coming to the doctors appointment and seeing his own daughter. To him it's out of sight out of mind, fuck me and her. I have no one to talk too, and I want all of you other expecting moms that are going through pregnancy "alone" or even feeling alone. Please, message me. I will listen.