OK so I got a question. me and my husband are arguing over this. so I told him if I ever had to choose between me living or my children I'd choose them every single time. like if I went into labor and for some reason (idk if it can happen or not ) they said they only could save me or the babies I'd tell them to do whatever they have to to make sure my babies are brought into the world no matter what even if that means I die. he told me that's selfish of me... because he's in a wheelchair and he said the state would take away the kids... and what would he and the kids do without me and all... I told him I'd die for my kids even tho they aren't born yet... I just do not get it. how am I selfish for wanting my children to live and grow up and have lives even if I'm not here?
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On the one hand I understand wanting to do everything to protect your children, but on the other I know what it's like to lose a mother, to watch your father's world collapse at the same time, and to grow up without that presence. My dad did OK, and I will always be grateful for the way he raised us, but it was hard, especially around puberty.
my husband and I had the same convo, I told him if anything goes wrong and you had to choose please let me go and choose to save our daughter. at first he wasn't too impressed because we can make another one. I told him it took us over 2 years to get her and she is meant to be here, and I have completely confident that he will be able to raise her to be an amazing lady. It was hard for him to finally agree but he did. now if anything did happen idk if he would have kept his word though.
@harleyann yeah I just think it's because I can feel both my babies moving and living in me and I know they have life in them. and he doesn't feel that connection yet until the minute he gets to see our twins for the 1st time I think his world will be changed forever
@mrs.desiraec exactly! most selfless thing we can do for our kids.
@constancetinople I see their points... but I guess it's just my "motherly instinct" in me to just want them to be OK always no matter the cost.
It's not selfish of you but he has a point too. I definitely understand your side of it. I had the same conversation with my husband once and he said he'd pick me over the baby. It is definitely possible but a very very very rare circumstance. I know this sounds harsh, but if you died, his whole world would be upside down. If the baby died, it wouldn't change. Not that I'm saying the baby's life doesn't matter, I just think that's their way of looking at it. When you're pregnant its real to you right away. But I think for guys it's not real until they hold the baby. After he holds the baby and gets to fall in love with him/her he might see your side.
@erinnlalalahsyu yeah I see what he's saying bt I wouldn't ever even give it a 2nd thought. my mom would help raise them. I'd never have anymore babies after this anyway. like if I lost these babies now I'd make sure I never got pregnant again just because I've had such a hard time with this pregnancy thus far. but he just is saying that because he says he loves me more than anybody even the babies. but I love the babies way more than I love myself
my hubby says the same thing as yours. his reasoning is that he just simply can't live without me. As sweet as that is, i too would rather choose my kids over me. but i also can see where he's coming from.
That's a good point. I can see how he disagrees though. He probably sees that you all would be able to make another baby but he can't get another you. Not saying that you're wrong. I can see it either way.
my husband wouldnt choose the baby over me he says but i think if it came down to it it would depend on the possibility. so if there was a higher chance of baby living he would choose baby and vice versa