So.. needing to vent. (I know I've done a lot of posts! But of course being new don't think it's…
So.. needing to vent. (I know I've done a lot of posts! But of course being new don't think it's wrong to catch up and let people learn about me).
I'm a single soon-to-be mother. The father of the child lives in California as I moved here to Kansas to get support from my cousin. He was my first, 5 years ago. We have had a complicated relationship as I seem to have slight commitment issues. We broke up a couple months ago of a horrible mistake I made and the encouragement of a, no-longer, friend. People spread a lot of rumors and said I was unfaithful (which wasn't true) and even his mom so since I told him I was pregnant he wanted a DNA test. So he and I talk but not too much. I went and visited him and everything was great. I'm hoping things change once our son is born and he gets his test. Only thing is I don't know if he will actually come out in January before he is born or when he is. I'm really nervous about it. I am still in love wth him and he says he still loves me but because of circumstances and his doubt "it's just how it has to be". I feel upset but at the same time I would rather wait a long time to fix things with my sons father than move on to someone else. Would anyone else feel the same? Also, last thing I told him a week ago was if he wasn't interested I'm not wasting my breath and he hasn't messaged me about anything about my last doctors appointment. He's really good for putting a wall up and i think he put up a brick wall.. if that makes sense. Anyways, I am not looking for any negative inputs since I already (before pregnancy) I've always had depression. If you've read this far... thanks for your attention! (: I just wanted to vent and put in my situation.
Kalie·
Мама дочки (1 год)
@littleone23 I think once the baby is born he will change. Why did you move though? I'm sure that made him upset, maybe ask him if he wants you to move back so you guys can be closer together for your sons sake? @littleone23
Sierra ·
В ожидании первенца
@ryliannsmommy, I am hoping things will change. I moved cause he wasn't helping me make a plan and because my current living situation at the time I was gonna end up not having anywhere to live and he was just not helping and we argued or at least had disagreements sometimes when we talked over the phone. I didn't know what to do and at first thought of giving my son up for adoption until my cousin told me she would help me. He was really upset that I left especially since I hadn't told him until a week prior to my departure date. I was told he was really hurt and upset from our mutual friend. I also hadn't talked to him either. I feel like if I call him and ask after I stated I wouldn't waste my breath that would... I mean.. I feel like I should keep my ground on it. But i thought about it for once he gets the test and then I'll say something about it or even talk to him if he messages me and mention something about it? I just hate being needy and asking such serious questions and planning when he doubts everything. If that makes sense?
Sierra ·
В ожидании первенца
@ryliannsmommy, sorry for the super long .. message haha thank you for reading it though(:
Julia ·
Мама троих детей
I think you should continue to focus on you and baby as difficult as it may seem, and let him come around on his own. Be happy 😊You don't wanna waste your time pushing him because he might put up even bigger a wall. So focus on you and build yourself up. Make good girl friends and mommy friends and keep yourself
busy. If he doesn't come around at least you didn't waste your time and energy. And if he does, well there you go 😊 Sometimes men really just need space and we tend to be overwhelming with or emotions and stuff lol trust me I've done it lol Best of luck to you mama, stay strong 💪🏼
Sierra ·
В ожидании первенца
@lotus8blossom, thank you!(: that's kind of what I was doing was just giving him space and letting things play out. Although - girl friends or mama friends? Almost impossible. I never leave the house and I don't work since I'm a full time student but classes are online. It's hard to find any friends in a quiet town :(
Julia ·
Мама троих детей
@littleone23, you're so welcome :-) I know what it's like. I'm a full time student in college with three kids, online and on campus. It's not easy. I also find it's not easy to make friends, which is why I've downloaded some mommy apps. Maybe post in a mommy forum looking for friends 😊💗 you got this!