I am still having some problems with the whole being a mom kind of thing. My mom still has temporary…

so what all is wrong? Like do you not feel like you can be a mom or what? Sorry I'm a little confused

I have never had to take care of anything. Let alone an actual person. And I just don't want to. So even after the temporary custody is over it will really be the same. And on Friday someone from DCF is coming. So hopefully I won't be home. I don't want to talk to them

So you don't want custody at all?

You not being there Friday is a show of neglect

Just tell DCF to give your mom permanent custody then. How you are acting is going to look much worse and just drag things out

well not to sound mean or anything but if you dont wanna be a parent to your kid then as @bonniesue said just give your mom full custody then instead of hiding from them . and your very lucky you have a mom that will step in and raise your child because your child could easily have ended up in the system . why did you even bother to have the baby in the first place if you didnt want to be a parent why didnt you just give the baby up for adoption ? once again not trying to be mean !! @firsttimegypsymama

There is a court date set for February I believe. I wish I didn't have to go to it. The first one was so boring. My husband probably won't be there at that court date. And my husband probably won't be there at that DCF person coming on Friday either.

And me and my husband do not come out to see or speak to the visiting nurse that comes every week.

Please try to be there for your son even if it's to admit that you aren't ready to be a mom. There is nothing wrong with admitting you aren't ready, there is something wrong with avoiding your responsibility because you don't want to have to deal with it. Good luck to you! Your son is beautiful. If nothing else, do it for him! 😊

Kinda agree with @jeanetta25 Why did you guys have the baby if you knew you didn't want to parent? not being mean either. just trying to get an understanding. Is it post partum? You guys need to show your face on Friday when DCF comes by to show you're not neglecting him you just want better for him.

seems like you dont want your son maybe its best he stays with your mom

My husband loves Grayson.

But my husband works all the time. And I know that he wanted a baby really bad so I was glad that I could help him make one. And then I thought that being a mom would feel and be different than this. Idk it's just not.

I can't tell any person who comes to the house how I actually feel

You guys on this app are the only ones I can talk to about this

I'm not trying to be mean.

have you talked to your doctor about depression?

I'm probably going to sound like a bitch but whatever. Just sign him over already. Tell them on Friday you don't want to be a mom, I'm sure they'll start the paperwork. You not showing your face (you and your husband) is really upsetting, unloving and neglectful. A court date for your son's custody is boring?! I never had to care for another person before either. When you're a first time mom, it's all new and things you have to learn. I completely understand mental illness I personally suffer from PTSD, GAD, a severe panic disorder and depression. But you need to do something! You cannot just do nothing and coast by. You are so lucky your mom stepped up and is willing to care for your child. I really wish hope the best for your son, he deserves to be loved and cared for.

Yes I have talked to my doctors about depression. And I am on Lexapro. And I am on Lorazepam. They stopped Prozac. And I am going to ask the place I went to get those medications about getting me a therapist.

And my husband is on three different medications for mental health too and he goes back Friday. And I was gonna go with him

@firsttimegypsymama, simple question do YOU want your son back???

anybody who NEGLECTS their responsibilities like attending mandatory custody court dates and DCF checkups is obviously neglecting their child... you keep wishing you're not around when they come to visit and you're dreading these court dates because they're boring??? you got bigger problems as a human being for not seeing the fault in all of that. i don't pity anyone who uses medication or depression as an excuse. we ALL have problems. I've been abused my entire life, beat to a pulp, been diagnosed with bipolar depression, PTSD, and have been to hell and back. how you choose to deal with problems as an adult is what sets you apart from being a child with excuses. if you care enough you WILL find a way, if NOT, you will find an excuse. Best of luck to your blessing Grayson. he needs it more than you and your husband.

My mom says maybe they said neglect because I don't sit and hold my son. And my mom says me and my husband seem very self involved. My husband is my everything.

I'll go to the court date but I'll complain the whole time. Just like I did last time. And my husband almost didn't go to the last court date because he would rather be working.

then you deserve to have Grayson taken away. believe that. you think the reason for the neglect complaint is because you "don't sit and hold your son?" read EVERYTHING ELSE in what you comment. all of that ma'am is neglect.if you're just gonna sit and complain through the court date, do the world a favor and don't go because you're lack of enthusiasm to get your son back is showing through your colors. shame on y'all.

My husband wants Grayson.

My mom was taking care of Grayson way before someone called DCF and if we knew who called me and my husband would beat them

side note---you and your husband deserve each other since you're both so selfish and self-involved that you refuse to acknowledge the harm you're imposing on your son's future and happiness by not fighting for him!!! he may have down's syndrome but he still has feelings. where's your humanity!

My mom took Grayson to his doctors today while me and my husband slept

My mom deals with the visiting nurses because me and my husband hate them. My mom is supposed to take care of him and be with him. It's part of the custody thing

you keep saying your husband loves and wants him but he would rather work instead of going to court to fight for him??don't talk about it... be about it. your actions are clearly proving what it is you really want. ugh this is repulsive.

u keep saying my husband loves grayson my husband wants grayson but NOT ONCE HAVE YOU SAID YOU LOVE HIM OR YOU WANT HIM

My husband is counting down the days from the 90 day temporary custody. And we will get him back

And my husband is my best friend and my world.

no it's YOUR responsibility. She's doing it out of the kindness of her heart and because it's her obligation for his welfare and health. listen to what you're trying to justify with me.

I didn't even want to stay in Boston when my son was in the NICU. I almost went home. It's like an hour away. My mom paid for hotels for me and her and my husband. And it sucked. So that's why when he has his heart surgery I probably won't be going

Either way when my husband and I move out with Grayson no one can say anything

Which is what we will do if we have to

I enjoy being with grayson sometimes. But can't stand the crying. I will not have it. I hate it

What happened to not being mean

I'm trying to talk about this

Grayson is fine. I'm so glad I don't have to go to all his appointments. My mom does.

being real is not being mean. people who sugarcoat shit to make you feel better especially when you're wrong is mean. know the difference.im being honest and you can't stand it.

what's mean is each moment can be his last like his heart surgery and you think you can just pass off the opportunity to show what kind of mother you are.

I don't even know what justify means

I don't want to be stuck up in Boston for days and nights again in the hospital

and FYI---babies cry. you will not have it? you hate it? then give him love and attention. if you're lacking in both, give him up. Don't come on here in a community of loving supportive mothers and expect anyone to side with you when you're abandoning your child. WE dont possess those traits!

Everyone is supposed to be able to put what they want on here

then expect honest answers! what you're doing is morally wrong

Google "justify" then.Dont argue with me about shit

Grayson is fine. He is being taken care of. When I was trying to take care of him when we got home from the hospital I found it boring and annoying and tiring and I just couldn't stand his screams. So I would always end up giving him to my mom to take care of for the whole day and night until my husband came home from work

im sorry but you and your husband sound like unfit parents specially you !! grayson does not need to be with you nor him !! seems like he loves him but still does not step the plate if your mom is doing it all. and you you should have never had him !! and i pray to god that while your in the state you in that you take precautions from here on out and never have children again until your ready cause all you care about after reading all these comments are yourself !! i really feel bad for your son and im glad your mother is being a parent even though did not make him and its both you guys job. no one on here is trying to be mean but we all as mom dealt with something in life we all was first or is first time parents and we all scarfice what we want and need to provide for the little people we made . and its really heart wrenching seeing how your so detached and your husband nor having a clue himself on how to parent since yall run and sleep through things yall should attend while your mother plays mother . i hope these people give your mom full custody or give him to loving people who will care for him

. you and your husband should not have any rights to him as of now !! and im sorry but im not sorry @firsttimegypsymama

My husband is counting down the days to get him back

There's a lot of life left to live and people to hangout with and places to go. We used to bring Grayson with us when we were out all day with our friends until midnight

21 years old and 26 years old.

if YOUR not ready to be an mother and dont even want to try and a baby cant even be a baby and do things like cry as babies do HE DO NOT NEED TO BE IN A HOUSE WITH YOU OR YOUR HUSBAND . what happens if YOU have to be alone with the baby all day and have no help ??? the thought of that scares me !!! please think about your son and let him go so he can be loved the right way and cared for the right way .@firsttimegypsymama

People going to complain if we leave Grayson at home with family when we go out. So we just take Grayson with us. And still hangout with our friends

I can't be alone with him. That's part of the whole custody thing

all you mommies minus well just stop SHE DOESNT GET IT !!! we all see that that boy needs to be far away from her and her husband as possible . all we can do is pray for grayson and his future !! the more we talk to her the more selfish and unfit shes sounds and its pissing me off and breaking my heart for that sweet baby . @justine_kim @ @mommy_faith

@mommy_faith she has plenty of pics on him in her posts. he has down's syndrome. he's absolutely gorgeous

if you cant be trusted alone with your own son you dont need to be around him just let him be with your mother and continue on hiding and going out with friends . put your son first and let him go if your husband really loves him he would let your son stay with your mother . where its obvious he NEEDS to be . @firsttimegypsymama

@guaderrama_babies2 🙌

Grayson

@mommy_faith you have to scroll further down...there's quite a bit

He's beautiful I want him!

My doctors and my mom already know how I feel

And my husband knows how I feel

Yea we went and had fun with our friends. We go and stay at their house like every other weekend

And me and my husband are getting help. We just started the new medications

So when you go stay at your friend house you take the baby? Do you care for him when your there? Or do you just let him cry?

Since my mom has temporary custody we leave for the weekend and come back whenever. And before the temporary custody we would bring Grayson with us and everyone there would take care of him

It would be nice to actually be able to be parents

Agreed!! @justine_kim @jeanetta25 that baby boy is so handsome! I wish he was blessed with parents who want him!

@firemanswife do you see what they say

Talk to God about your problems or family, close friends, don't do it here!! Don't let other ppl opinions make you, you are a queen, you will get through this obstacle!! @firsttimegypsymama

@firsttimegypsymama, you do what you need to do as a mother, you need to surround yourself with positive ppl!!