I need to vent

This situation that I'm dealing with is not fun at all. I've always thought about what I'd do in a situation like this and how I'd hold my man down. Hell yeah ima keep doing that and I won't ever stop doing that but I miss him soooooo much. Its not like he's at work no! I haven't seen him in like a whole week and I haven't talked to em for about 3-4 days. He's in a safe place but I just can't see him or talk to him. I'm 19 years old okay. I'm super emotional I left my parents house bc I couldn't deal with the bs that was happening there. I don't plan on going back bc I really just wanna be independent and do what I wanna do. I'm so stressed out and I feel so alone! I feel like no matter where I go I just don't belong. I feel like he's the only one who'll understand bc he's the only one that I really tell everything to. If I am pregnant I do plan on keeping it but I know that I'll have to leave where I'm at. The sad and stressful part is that idk when he's gonna be home. Yo...I'm tryna be strong and not break down but its so much hurt built up inside me and the other thing is that I have to walk around like nothing's wrong. Nobody knows that me being pregnant is even a possibility. Only my two Bestfriends, my boyfriends mom and my boyfriend know. I miss him so much 😭😭😭 And idk what to do. I'm so alone its not even funny.