I'm not sure if I'm going though postpartum depression or just filled with emotions and hormones but I've been feeling…

I'm not sure if I'm going though postpartum depression or just filled with emotions and hormones but I've been feeling SO overwhelmed lately. I just had my beautiful son 8 days ago and am in so much pain but haven't a choice but to be moving around so I feel like I'm not recovering well. I feel horrible for not being able to breastfeed my baby. My milk is the best for him and I just don't know how to do it! I've tried pumping and it's not working. I see the milk and it's flowing but the pump only pumps one drop per suction and filling up an ounce takes 30 painful minutes. The hospital I went to provided horrible care and didn't teach me a thing. I can't sleep because I'm constantly worried about the baby and if he's breathing, comfortable, and happy😞. On top of that I got a job but believe I missed out on the opportunity because I couldn't do the drug test on time. The dang thing expired a few hours before I got to the place and I didn't know I had to do it before a certain time, and not day. I'm so frustrated. I just want to be able to provide for my baby and things keep getting in my way. I'm in school and missed a week of assignments due to the birth and him being in the NICU for so long. Everything is falling apart and I feel like I have no control anymore. I know baby boy comes first but yesterday I really understood what that meant. I can't just get up and go anymore. Ugh😞😭. I feel like I'm failing him and I've only had him for a week. I just keep crying and crying and I don't know what to do. My entire body is different. I don't feel sexy or even like a woman anymore. My boobs used to be one of my favorite physical features and now I'm just different. Going back to pre baby weight but u have a weird fat pouch☹. I'm so happy I have my baby but I'm so unhappy with how I've been feeling about myself lately.