π¨RANTπ¨ I need to get this off my chest...
My daughter's dad is forever broke and refuses to change it. We went through shit just so I could get him out of paying child support because he promised me he'd step up and help me. He wants to be there for our daughter. So I gave him the chance. Plus he's so broke from paying his other child support. I've had to give him money a couple times just so he could get gas to see her. NOW his insurance is up on his car and guess what... Can't afford a new policy... Great. I'm pissed. He rather drink and sleep his problems away rather than doing ANYTHING to change his situation. He's miserable but doesn't do anything about it! Not even for her which I don't understand. So what, you're going to let yourself stay broke and not be able to drive anywhere for the rest of your life? What are you going to do when she's older? He can't see her now he's mad about that. I'm not bringing her to his barracks. No. Be a man, get your shit together. For your kid at least! I would do ANYTHING for her. I pay for EVERYTHING for our daughter. He's contributed zero. I've begged him to put her on DEERS. It's free! Did he do it? NO. I've begged him to sign her birth certificate. And no he didn't do it. All I got was "ok."... Why would you not want to get that done asap? Oh wait... He can't drive! I could pick him up but he can't he has work he can't get out of. So we've been fighting over his situation. I'll admit I started it. Only because I can't be in this situation with him if he doesn't want to do anything about it. That's not fair on me or our daughter. Am I wrong? I've been pushy. I know I can't make him do anything. I told him if he's not willing to at least try to change his situation, I'll help where I can, then he needs to forget about seeing her. I mean he physically can't anyways! He has no legal rights to her but he's so butt hurt. It's a privilege that I even let him see her after he left us. He came crawling back asking to prove that he's 100% committed to us. He's told me he loves us and we have his heart... But we get this. Maybe I'm wrong. Maybe I'm expecting too much. I just wanted him to find that motivation like he had when he wanted to see her. He did what he could to make that happen. Now it's like he's given up.
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DNA doesn't give them anything over the child. It simply states so and so is the father and gives proof. My husband had one done on our oldest that we had at 16. His DNA came back 99.9999% and he had my maiden name. My husband had no control over anything. The DNA was there for proof of insurance and child support. All I had to do was go to the child support office and file. They set a court date, he missed it due to military and the next month our son started getting child support and I went to the local national guard office and had him put on tricare. All without needing his time or even speaking to him. Now we're married so none of it matters. But the DNA won't cost you a dime, just him. Do not let him get away with treating your child that way. Your child deserves the money and insurance if he's not going to be a father! @sweetpea_nut
@jenn61115, I might have to resort to that. Or just take care of it myself and he can have no legal authority over her for the rest of her life.
@angiek, idk how to force him. I've asked and I've begged him to come with me to do it and all I get is "ok". No date or time. He doesn't get why it's so important no matter how much I've stressed it to him. It would be a LOT easier on both of us and it wouldn't cost him much just his valuable time...
File for a DNA. If he refuses to cover her on insurance then he'll get in some serious trouble.
@sweetpea_nut, can you force him to sign the birth certificate of you do a paternity test? If you could use the military benefits the other poster mentioned plus medical coverage, things would be a lot easier on you.....
And as far as forcing him to sign the birth certificate I don't think you can. But they gave us a choice to change our oldest last name once we got the DNA results back in.