I just want to get an understanding of things because I like to see things from two different sides. So my husband pays 400$ for child support for his son and his son is always at our house since his mother has a lot on her plate. When he needs something we always buy it but never goes to her house except shoes. So she text my husband telling him he needs to do better with helping her out nd that child support isn't enough (mind you she has two other kids) but idk how he isn't helping her out when he is over here all the time and whenever she calls my husband to get him he drops everything to do so. He goes to school activities after working 12-20hours shift. I feel like a six year old doesn't cost as much as a baby and that she just isn't budgeting her money properly. She said she needs money for co pays but our insurance has a 5$ co-pay so I don't understand why she can't afford medical expenses when insurance covers literally lost of everything. And she wants him to buy his school supplies but we buy them every years and she never uses them! In my opinion she isn't using the child support properly and she needs to learn how to budget. She is always trying to get more from is when we give all that we can. What do you guys think ?
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Ugh that's why I say they should make a child support card! Because lord knows most time that money ain't going towards the kid.
Go for 50/50 everyday his with y'all document what u do what y'all spend how long he's with u if he takes her to court and she starts keeping him from him start texting her to see him and if it shows proof she's keeping him away from y'all the courts will have full proof of it and will help when your case sounds like she's a bitter bby moms and wants him to put for all her kids not just his
U can ask for receipts on what she is spending it on I understand completely how you feel I have 2 step sons and we pay 700 a month they are 6 and 8 and we buy the clothes and school supplies and pretty much every thing else and she had 3 other children 4 ,3,2 years old and I know she spends it on them but she would never give them to us because she gets money and doesn't work 😒 it's so hard to be a step parent :( good luck Hun
i would go to court hun ......and she nust doi g this shit bc u have his baby thats why ...u knw how ppl get when they dnt get over someone ...and i bet she just doing this so u and ur man can fight ..dnt give in and if the court alteady has his visitations set then do it like
if he goes for 50/50 or if he can prove he's with him most of the time he can actually get it reduced. they need a legitimate reason as to why she would be looking for an increase in support. she can't just ask it to be raised and it just happen. theyll ask her for a breakdown of her expenses for him, school and all. and if he's on your husbands insurance, that's another plus.
Okay so unfortunately your going to have to. #1 she cant be trusted so you need to keep track of everyday you have him, every receipt of everything you buy and you have the child support. secondly once you do go to court anf get custody or split custody they days she keeps the child away you have to go to the police station and report it. my brother went through the same thing. now he has custody of his daughter. He was paying ia childs mother 900 dollara a month for one child and the baby lived with her grandparents.
@2queenbee9, he's tried to get her to take him off but she is crazy and says that we don't have him a lot when we clearly do he goes to his mom only for a week out of the month and we had him the entire summer smh. I tell my husband to go to court but he is scarred from the last time cause she kept him away from us
I think she's taking advantage of your husbands income. I make it on $200 a month for TWO kids!! And I buy a lot of things the need outside of what child support pays for. I NEVER ask him for more unless an unexpected "thing" has popped up and we both pay half. If she can't pay for ONE child with $400 plus the extras it's most likely because she isn't working or her husband, if she has one, isn't making enough to cover their wants/needs. It sickens me. I do NOT get my nails done, I do NOT get my hair done or shop with child support. 100% goes on my children. Maybe your husband should reopen the case and fight for full custody. They'll talk to the child, too, to see what he wants. Otherwise, this'll happen until he's 18... Good luck to you guys!
If I was going through this with my husband id freak out! It's sad that all the good dads that are there for their children go through this. Mothers that do this are just really shitty in my opinion. If I was going through this I'd at least just talk with a lawyer and decide from what he tells you if you should move forward with taking it to court. If she is really gonna keep his son away from him she's a pos no mother should ever do that to a child that's not fair to them when they didn't do anything
I understand but you have his son so why are you giving her money for a child that stays with you? Of course she is spending it on the other children if her son they share is with you!
He is paying that for his son but I believe she is using it for her other kids @2queenbee9
@jessicruz, it's so frustrating because now I'm also freaking out because I think she is going to try to get the cp raised and we can't take that hit right now especially with our baby in the way
I'm just glad I'm not over reacting because i didn't understand her logic what so ever and I didn't like how she tried to come at my husband as if he is a dead beat which he is far from it. This man lives for his kids @jaxxmommie22
you can actually say how she uses the money. that is why now they have a child support debit card that can't be used just anywhere. my aunt has one and they're strict with it. and if he's mainly with you guys, they can reduce the amount he gives. maybe he cab go for 50/50 custody? 400$ is more than enough unless she's using it for things besides your stepson's actual expenses.
He is scared to go back to court because the last time he did which was years ago she kept him from us until the court day which was 4 months straight so he is trying to keep it out of court @jaxxmommie22 @novaskyy but I think this time around would def be worth the risk
I seriously hate moms that do this!! It drives me crazy!😳 $400 seems like a lot to me and should be way more then enough for a 6 year old. Can't you just go back to court or something since you basically have him anyways? She's definitely playing you and that's not right. I would at least call a lawyer or someone and just talk to them about it and get enough proof to show.
She only has one by by husband and the other two are her ex bf kids. She claims he isn't around and hasn't heard from him in months. My thing is if you can't afford him then just let the boy stay with us. I think he would be happier as well being with his father especially now he is getting older and needs a full time make in his life which can be provided @novaskyy
I'm sorry but it's highly unlikely she can't find him I know a lot of people who lie to the state just so they can't put them on child support she has to know something unless she barely knew him when she got pregnant I get SSN y'alls responsibility is not the other two she should have been careful cause if he's giving her 400 she couldn't do it on her own from the get go she had those kids she needs to start budgeting her money better not saying she does this but also trynna keep ya child in the latest when u can't afford it isn't smart there's way to have your child looking nice and spending lots of money shoot 400 is DAMN GOOD ENOUGH FOR A 6 YEAR OLD cause normally the state minimum is normally around 200 sometimes less I'm sure there's away he can change it to buy everything instead of giving her cash but just keep the receipts invade she try something the courts do allow that if he is forced by the government to pay that's crazy how many kids does she have of she only has one by him?
While it does sound like she has some issues managing her finances there's nothing you do about how she spends the support. Just document all the stuff you were telling us about and if she tries to get more from court you guys will have the upper hand 😉
She can't find her other kids father so she isn't getting anything from him so that's what I told my husband that it seems like she is making you pay for them too! Those are not his kids and my husband goes above and beyond for bus son all the time. That's why I flipped when he told me she said 400$ isn't enough! Like wtf are you doing with the money and the stuff we do buy?? @novaskyy I wish he could stop giving her money but he set it up so they would just take it out his check
She's playing y'all if she can't support him and she has other children she just should let y'all have him secondly is she not getting child support for the others 400 is way more than enough for a 6 year old they don't require much unless she blowing her money ridiculously I would stop giving her the money and pretty much buy everything he needs or put it in an account for him since she clearly isn't budgeting right my sons father was only giving me 100-200 a month and I had a job making 10 an hour paying rent car note insurance and etc and was not struggling so clearly she can do it I did it even got a better job making 16 an hr maybe she should also maybe try finding a better paying job because clearly u guys are helping
I think she's trying to use him as much as possible not only for his son but possibly spending that money also on the other kids as well I would make sure if he's buying it for his son he needs to ask his son if anything he gives him is his mother taking it away from him to give it to his other brothers and sisters but I would try to control it so his mother doesn't take away from what was given to him by y'all
He should go to court, have the child support modified along with his custody agreement. She is a moron and is definitely not budgeting properly. It's her fault she can't take care of all these kids. You're so calm. Props to you.