My little boy is now 11 days old and I would now like to share my birth story with you...

I was due to be induced on Friday 29th July at 10:00am, I was having to stay over in hospital on the Thursday due to a funny reading earlier that day on the ctg machine and they were monitoring me for every 6 hours. All seemed ok. Little did I know that night was day 1 of no sleep for the next 5 nights! I woke about 6:30 the next morning with a funny sensation and when I stood up, my waters broke! loads! I thought brilliant I may not have to be induced and I can have a natural birth!! As soon as my waters broke my contractions started, mild at first. After a midwife had checked my waters, I was informed there was meconium in them and to keep an eye on them throughout the day to see if they got any darker. I was on paracetomol all day in the MAU with contractions getting stronger and unfortunately my waters were looking a darker colour as the day went on. I was examined around 4:00 and was only 2cm so the decision was made to move me to labour ward and I was put on a drip. I managed on gas and air for 6 hours and contractions were getting pretty bad and I was tired (gas and air is amazing!!) I was only 4cm dilated at this point :( doctor came in to examine me and said she would give me til 7am and if no progress then I would have to have a section. it was at this point that I was advised by midwife to have an epidural. I really didn't want one but I was tired and in a lot of pain so I agreed. It took 5 people to get it in me! 😂 It was shortly after that that things took a turn for the worse...... I developed a high temperature, high heart rate and blood pressure and babies heart rate was going up. I remember lying on my side violently shaking as I felt so cold. I felt really strange and like I was tripping!! It was at the point I was taken for an emergency c section. I felt like I was in another world being wheeled down to theatre. My beautiful baby boy was born at 6:18am. I wasn't able to hold him although my OH did and then after about 5 minutes he was taken away along with my OH to have a drip put in him and have tests done due to infection. I can honestly say I do not remember the next 24 hours.....
I was transferred to a high dependency unit and hooked up to drips and monitors, I only learnt afterwards that I had developed septicaemia during labour and delivery. My heart rate had rocketed to 170 during the section.
We stayed in hospital for a week after that and was constantly monitored and was on the mend. My boy had all sorts of tests done during the week including a lumber puncture but thankfully all came back negative and the antibiotics seemed to have cleared any infection up, thank God!
I can honestly say it was the hardest week of my life, full of mixed emotions and only now am I starting to feel more settled but still not quite there..... the hardest thing for me is not being able to remember the first day of my boys life...I also resented my OH for having a bond with him that I felt I didn't have due to A) not remembering the first 24 hours of his life and B) not being able to do the simple things with him in the early days like change him etc because of pain from the section, hooked up to drips, catheter etc but we will get there ........ Thanks for taking the time to read ❤