So not only is my baby stuck in the NICU until his surgery but I now realize I'm experiencing baby blues. this is so much at once, I can't even look at another family with their kids in public without crying...I just wanna take him home so bad, I miss him all the time and being at the hospital seeing him hooked to all the cords and IV lines is so hard and overwhelming.

not to mention everyone just telling me to be strong for him when all I wanna do is sleep next to his bed at the hospital.

it's so hard watching him, especially today..they gave him morphine to sedate him for a CT scan and after he was so tired from the morphine he stopped breathing twice in my arms and we had to beg him to breathe again. luckily the doctors came in and gave him a medicine to reverse the morphine and he's fine now, but it's so terrifying to hold your baby while he turns blue and limp in your arms twice...I'm sorry I'm ranting about this I just don't know who to talk to right now.