So I need some advice. My husband and I have his little sisters visiting. The oldest is 13 and the youngest is 10. The 13 year old is a breeze. She is so well behaved and well mannered. The 10 year old is the complete opposite. She Makes it her daily mission to give me hell. Whether it's talking back, giving me attitude any time I say something. Being mean to my 2 year old.
Well, yesterday was a pretty rocky day in my household. I woke up to the sisters arguing. The 13 year old was yelling, screaming, and crying at the 10 year old. I sat down with the 13 year old and she had a breakdown. A legit breakdown. Screaming she can't take it anymore. And thinks of suicide daily. I immediately call my husband and tell him to leave work and come home. So dealing with this, I also have to deal with the 10 year old throwing things and yelling and screaming when she was told to stay in the room separated from her sister
So my husband makes it home and the 13 year old tells us that she has been raped repeatedly when she was younger and well as dealing with the fact their mother left them.
So my husband decides that his younger sisters are not going back home and that they are moving in with us. I'm all for the 13 year old moving in with us, but I don't want the 10 year old in my home. Visiting or living. Granted I don't want the same things happening to her but I can't deal with her attitude daily. Whooping her doesn't work. Punishment doesn't work. Nothing works. So I told my husband I don't want her here. And he said he's not separating them. So ladies, the question is what would you do?
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if you think that the 10year old acting out has something to do with her mom leaving, how do you think she's gonna feel about her sister no longer being there as well.? they both need to be LOVED. that's where most acting out comes from ( the lack of feeling loved) I say if you take one take both. with the younger one your just gonna have to be very very firm in your rules and discipline. once she gets that certain things can't be tolerated by living with only you guys her behavior should change. She needs to know then that you and your husband aren't about to have the misbehavior. Stay firm.
We talked to her as well. And she said nothing has happened to her in that manner. We are pretty sure most of her acting out is because their mother left them. So now their dad is raising them but he's always working. But we were telling her that and she says she doesn't care about her mother leaving. (We know that is not true. She definitely cares). But it's just her attitude. I'm so over it. They have other family she can go to that gets her in check. But she feels because my husband is her brother he's not supposed to correct her while she's in the wrong. And the 13 year old has so much on her plate from playing a motherly role to her sister to even taking care of things for their dad. ( not in any way sexual but just like ironing his clothes, cleaning up behind him, running to the store for him) I'm just really not wanting the youngest one to stay with us
I would put her in therapy. Are you sure nothing has happened to her as well? You and your husband will have to be united on all fronts, but maybe she has also been abused and is acting out because of it? I'm sorry I can't imagine dealing with that and a toddler 😔. Must be really tough but I would def put her in therapy and anger management
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