Where do I even begin? So i'm getting induced tomorrow...... My fiancee picks up his 8 year old son every Sunday from 11-7 because it is part of him and his ex wives agreement e...

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Where do I even begin? So i'm getting induced tomorrow...... My fiancee picks up his 8 year old son every Sunday from 11-7 because it is part of him and his ex wives agreement every other weekend and every Sunday. SO today he picks his son up like usual, and my fiancee ask his son "how was your 8th birthday party yesterday buddy?" his son replied back that mommies boyfriend and his daughter couldn't come to the birthday party because mommy and boyfriend got into a argument and boyfriend started hitting and throwing things at mommy......This boyfriend did it in front of my fiances son, he has a record of domestic abuse in front of a minor. NOW with that being said, my fiancee wants to keep his son and not return him tonight to his mother because he is tired of his son seeing these things between mommy and boyfriend. Well if he keeps his son tonight he will be going to the hospital with us tomorrow when i get induced..... I have told my fiancee they will not let a 8 year old stay in the room while I am pushing and giving birth.... He said ok well he will take his son to the waiting room and sit with him until after I have our son. SO...... that means I will go through labor by myself, see the baby alone and have a stranger cut the cord.... I DO NOT want that...... His mom has to work until 5, my dad is out of state, my mom is a nurse and works 12 hour shifts, an my grandma stays at home with my paralyzed uncle. I had already told my family before all of this happened that I only wanted me and my Fiancee there to experience everything together and family come after he is born, and we are settled in so no one requested time off. When I tell my fiancee how I feel about everything he tells me that his son is in danger and he will not return him (there is no custody agreement finalized yet so the mag. office said there is nothing the mom can do if he doesn't return him) an that our son that will be born tomorrow is fine and he isn't in harms way like his other son is..... This really hurts my feelings, am I over reacting?

Renee · Answer

well it sounds as though you just want someone there if he isn't in that case you aren't necessarily over reacting

missing563user · Answer

Oh also it probably hurts the fiancé too that he may not be able to see his second born

missing563user · Answer

I think you have the hormones, but you can be grateful that he so adamantly puts his son first. If he does that, he's going to do the same for your new son together! Also, I think depending on the hospital, they actually may let you have the 8yo in the room at your request 💕

Angel Jones · Answer

I don't think you're over reacting. as a step mother myself you have every right to feel upset. HOWEVER, these are the types of things we take on in this particular role. He is being a good dad by keeping his son safe even if it means missing out on this delivery. Id say it isnt easy on him either. Its good to talk those feelings through with him as long as its not a defensive conversation. Try and stay positive. Focus on the fact that once the baby is here you will have the whole family together. And big brother now gets to be part of that because of how much his dad cares.

Brittany · Answer

I just don't want to be alone through all this..... I don't want him to go back to his moms house  either because the mom already has a domestic violence charge with a deadly weapon against her 3 months ago and the boyfriend has had two domestic violence charges in front of a minor in the past 9 months. If he does keep his son then when me and the baby come home he will stay with his mom and dad with his son (my dad doesn't want the drama of ex wife coming to our house so he doesn't want him and his son coming to stay at our house) and I'll be at home with my dad (we moved in with my dad to save up to buy a house) so I will not know what to do with a newborn by myself with my dad who doesn't know how to change a diaper so I don't really expect him to help me out.

Tasha · Answer

yea I understand you want him there with you he can be there while your laboring and maybe one of the nurses can watch him while your giving birth..
your reaction is normal though in my eyes

Answer

I think his first son is more important in this certain situation .  but making him choose is hard . he loves his in born baby too don't  stress it . his first son is in danger . I would let him keep him safe

Madison · Answer

I would have cried if I had been alone and my husband not been with me. but saying that, his son, which is also your son since you decided to be with this man, must be taken into consideration. you've got to have both you, your biological son, and your nonbiological son's best interests at heart, and I think putting the one son back in harms way just isn't right. but I've never been in your situation so you can disregard my thought if you want to

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