I have two daycare moms. One is my brothers gf, other was a stranger when I met her. My original…
I have two daycare moms. One is my brothers gf, other was a stranger when I met her. My original idea to do care was because I wanted to help my brother and his gf out and I wanted to stay home with my baby when he comes. I've been doing care for almost 2 months now, in my brothers house (he owns, I rent but I could have done care at my home). I thought I'd get more issues from the stranger than I do my brothers gf but I was so so wrong. She's home a lot (self employed lawyer) so she sleeps in and stays home some days, some days she's gone all day. She doesn't have much of a breastmilk stash and tries to pump before leaving baby with me, but lately it's been getting bad. She'll wait til he's starting to cry from hunger and sometimes just ends up breastfeeding baby. Then she gets upset if she ever hears him cry and told me today she never wants him crying when he's with me. Sorry but, he's 3 months old. Babies cry. Then she suggests obvious ways to soothe baby, like I have no idea how to soothe a baby. It's a huge insult. She doesn't realize that she's pushing me to the point where I'll just do care out of my home and drop her as a client. I can't leave her house multiple times a week feeling like a loser or like I'm doing something wrong when I should be trying to stay stress free. The other mom praises me and comments how happy her baby is. She even wants to figure out a way to start paying me more. I'm getting tired of feeling like crap and like I need to justify myself when I know I'm doing my best.
Melissa·
Мама сына-младенца
Oh man, if she knows a magical way to keep babies from crying, I would love to hear it!!
Melody·
Мама сына (4 года), беременна (31 нед.)
@maybabyboy, riiight?! I try my best. And I feel so unappreciated when she makes comments like that. She never has positive things to say.
Ariel·
Мама дочки-младенца
sounds like she expects you to connect with her baby the way she does which of course won't happen, being a mother we have very sensory connections to our babies and it's part of what makes it so hard to find someone you trust to care for your child and I know for me personally it is an issue I have. I am a stay at home mom though I've never had anyone care for my child, even when I have someone help me with my baby like my friend was bouncing my baby in the hammock while she slept so I could take care of chores or whatever but the way she was bouncing the hammock wasn't how my baby wanted to be bounced or swayed so she'd stir or wake up, and I'd feel this compulsion to take over bc I knew how my baby wanted to be bounced (and it's always different) but it wasn't my friends fault or that she was wrong, she just didn't feel nor know that connection and it's not something that can easily be taught. anyway so I think her hostility comes from what I'm talking about which if she feels so strongly about it she should just care for her own kid otherwise not judge you for something that's not in your control @indigenousmommy
Melody·
Мама сына (4 года), беременна (32 нед.)
@loveless, the thing is, I completely understand where she's coming from and the first two times I left feeling like shit I just decided to ignore the comments. Because being a new mom is something I've gone through before and I gave her the benefit of the situation. However, I can't continue doing something if I'm unappreciated and constantly being hovered over and scrutinized. I've never just sat and let him cry. She knows it's a problem and we will be talking about if I should be doing care for her any longer. It's either me, family, someone who will take extra care for my nephew or a stranger at a day care facility or stranger nanny that will charge 3x more than I do a month. But like I said, I do have an understanding of where she's coming from which is why I didn't consider not caring for my nephew before now.