I have a fear of doctors and medical settings, along with anxiety and ptsd. Whenever I find myself in a medical setting (or I so much as see one on TV) I have a panic attack and completely lose my mind.

So of course I expect to be entirely out of it and useless when it comes time to go to the hospital. Pain will not be the only reason I'm irrational.

In order to make sure things go smoothly, I've prepared a note that I'm going to give to my partner the moment we realize it's time to go to the hospital, before I've completely lost my mind.

It will tell him my preferences for epidurals and catheters and every little detail of what I would want, along with some of my legal and health info for him to sign the papers, and the baby's full name in case he's rattled too and forgets how to spell it.

It also has some reassuring words for him, saying that he is the boss of the situation and the one who makes the calls for his baby, and that he is our strong protector and I couldn't possibly get through it without him, and it says that even though he's such a strong man, it's perfectly okay and valid for him to be nervous too, and what he should do to take care of himself.