for those that have been following the updates on my son he is doing great. eating like a little piggy and getting healthier everyday. he was circumsized today and even with that happening he was still smiling at mommy and daddy. me however am having a hard time dealing with not having my baby with me and having to go to the hospital everyday and leave him everyday.

in the beginning i was told i couldnt hold my baby or pick him up. and even though i am now able to do a lot, from changing clothes, diapers, feeding, burping, and all that, the fact that i am doing it in a hospital setting is making me feel like im not being able to be the mom im supposed to be. i mean im there everyday for more than one or two hours. i hold him as much as i can but it is still so hard.

it's hard walking in and seeing him in a small bed with an iv line in his head and monitors hooked to him. its hard leaving him there with people he doesnt know and that dont sound like me or his father. i cant eat, i sleep a lot and i am having trouble pumping when i should because he isnt there to wake me. i feel like a part of me is missing. i know he will be coming home on Saturday but i have already had to have him there since the 10th. it's just so hard and please if you could spare a thought or prayer for me and my son, I would greatly appreciate it.