I don't know what's going on with me... I'll start crying b…

I don't know what's going on with me... I'll start crying because my mom isn't around the most important time in my life and it's really starting to get to me And I don't know what to do. I'm starting to get depressed...I don't want to do anything and I can't shake it off... at times I'm able to do me and work and all that but when I'm thinking alone or planning ny baby shower cuz my mom cant and my family really sucks...