Baby lost my nipple shield so I'm hoping I can get a new one soon.. And I'm hoping I can breast feed. But if tomorrow's…

Baby lost my nipple shield so I'm hoping I can get a new one soon.. And I'm hoping I can breast feed. But if tomorrow's appointment doesn't show progress I'm just going to stop.. I hate pumping.. I don't feel human.. It doesn't feel right.. I'd rather feed her from my boob than a pump.. It's more things to wash, It makes me sad cuz I feel like I failed... And plus this formula is helping with her gas and fussiness.. I just feel horrible cuz I can't do what so many other moms can do... I just wish I could..💔