Am I wrong for only wanting visitors in the L&D room after my csection on my own time and in the amount that I'm comfortable with? I don't want to be stressed out and over stimu...

Question

Am I wrong for only wanting visitors in the L&D room after my csection on my own time and in the amount that I'm comfortable with? I don't want to be stressed out and over stimulated when I'm not in the position physically to handle everything. And I don't want anyone coming through to see the baby if I'm sleeping or unconscious or otherwise unaware. My exboyfriend wants his kids there right away and all of his family and I don't even want mine there until I'm ready and we just got in an argument about it.

Jennifer Stough · Answer

but I'm completely different than his ex gf. she wanted drugs and to be doped up and doesn't care one way or another. I'm much more maternal and controlling.

Jennifer Stough · Answer

He should know, because both of his kids were born by cesarean! @cheeycheey

Cheyann · Answer

Men don't understand how csection are serious n wat it can do n just think on how they feel n want but if visitors gonna stress u out then they'd advise u not to have them cuhz stress can bring harm to u

Jennifer Stough · Answer

It's upsetting to me because he will give me whatever I want, but I think he feels like I'm doing it to be malicious or something. Now I feel like I'm just overhashing it and he wants me to just drop it. he's agreeing because he doesn't want to fight and I guess I just wanted us on the same page. 😞@candacelouise @cheeycheey

Candace · Answer

@babyreeves, well than just try and talk to him again. And really explain. Tell him you would love to have his kids be first to meet the baby but... Just after all the craziness is over. You're not keeping anyone away just want to make all is good before they come up! Try and make it about the kids, you don't want them waiting there for hours if it takes longer than expected or if baby has to go to nicu for some strange reason! Reverse psychology ha works every time

Cheyann · Answer

U can tell the dr n nurses that u don't want any visitors in the room

Jennifer Stough · Answer

It's hard too because I know it's just because they are excited but I have anxiety and control issues and it's hard for me to relinquish control. I want to be cognisant and I also want that time to bond and attempt to BF without everyone overstimulating me. I'm not a first time mom but I didn't have a good experience with the hospital and my visitors with my first and it made me resentful and feel out of control. @candacelouise

Candace · Answer

@babyreeves, I am the same way! I told my mom not to even tell anyone I'm in labor until my baby boy is here. I don't want to have to stress about someone holding him before me or someone I don't want, end up showing up when I'm/if for some reason I'm asleep or kinda "out of it".

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