to be honest, it does and like i said i am a doula and i still understand lol honestly, YOU are the one that is birthing so even if you had 5 doulas you're gonna listen to your mind and body 1st

if u decide to not get one just talk to him about your fears and how you'll need him to be that support even for the smallest ounce of pain and just keep talking about the labor process and how its your baby coming and this is so sacred and passionate and how itll be so peaceful

calm yourself and let him know that if there's no doula he needs to do some reading to be it for u lol

They really do. It's so annoying. I'm really scared tho, for this to be my first pregnancy and I'm gunning for an 100% natural birth, I just want all the help that I can get. But I also want to share that intimate experience with him. I guess in a way you can't have both. You only get so much from Lamaze classes, I need someone to remind me to breathe!! 😂😂😂 @domijac3 I hear all that stuff goes out the window once you actually go into labor

guys suck at talking sometimes lol

and i completely get that

we ended up having a rough labor due to my son being sunny side up and having his cord around his neck with a knot and just my So there i could break down i could lean on him (which i literally did like a couch lol) i could be completely emotionally and physically broken down from the pain (i dont do epidurals) and he would help with each contraction build me back up with the positive statements and hugs and kisses

sometimes a person that you dont really know can feel kind of intrusive and thats probably how he feels that he doesn't know this person but they want to be in the room to see your body and the process

Thank you.. I totally see your point. And I agree 100%. If he would communicate it to me this way instead of seeing it as something negative, I would totally be more accepting. It just sucks because I've had my mind set on having a doula and now that I've scheduled to meet with her, he doesn't want anything to do with it. But I'm sure he shares the same sentiments as you, he's just not communicating that to me properly. But then again, he probably just doesn't know how. Who knows. In any event, I want my labor process to be as intimate & relaxing as possible. This is my first pregnancy so I just want to make sure everything goes right and I'm not too overwhelmed or stressed 😕 @domijac3

during labor u can experience some anxiety with so many ppl around and just the thought of the 2 ppl who made the baby working together to labor with him helping u cope it's a beautiful thing and can strengthen your relationship.

also the oxytocin levels in your body you get from hugging and holding and kissing your so will rise and help with labor

well as a doula myself and a mom i can understand both I've been a doula for many couples when the mom just wanted help like how a nurse will help if asked but wasnt in the way and as i mom i get it, i just had my son last week and it was just me and him and i actually asked the nurses to stay out the way as much as possible it is a very sacred moment for the 2 of u and he may feel shes in the way of where he wants to be i think you 2 should make a pro and con separately and then talk about it with each other and make a decision

@domijac3, he doesn't want her taking away from "our moment", whatever that means smh

why is he