Having a baby with sickle cell I feel so guilty wanting to have another baby in the next two years…

Having a baby with sickle cell I feel so guilty wanting to have another baby in the next two years knowing that because her dad and I have the trait there is a 50/50 chance our future babies will have the disease. I really want this baby to have a sibling close in age but at same time going thru this I can't imagine having two babies with it and dealing with this painful disease. nobody wants to see their child in pain that can't really be fixed. Guess I'll just be happy with my 13 year old and 10 month old. Whatever God sees fit is what will be I won't force it. 😢