the minute I saw you bouncing around and moving those nubs... I bawled so loudly the entire office…

the minute I saw you bouncing around and moving those nubs... I bawled so loudly the entire office heard me from the ultrasound room. my tech cried with me because she had heard about how hard our journey was to keep a viable pregnancy was. now look at you... Xayden, I love you so much, son. I thank god everyday he made you a strong little man. and that he finally allowed us to experience this. I may not be a perfect person. ive done things in my past I'm not proud of. but I promise that I'm going to take care of you, that you come before anyone and anything. you will never go without. thank you so much for pulling through. for being healthy, and for letting me carry you. In 6 weeks we're gonna be meeting. and I promise you may hear me cry harder than I did the first time I laid my eyes on you. but it's because I'm so happy that you'll be here. and that you're MINE. I've waited so long to hold you. ive wanted you for so long and you're there. and I'm crying as I write this out and you're rolling around. I couldn't be any happier of a woman because your father and you.. are the reasons I get up everyday and continue going. I love you so much, baby boy. thank you for being my rainbow and miracle baby. you've truly changed me in ways I can't explain. and I know you'll do nothing more but continue to make me strive to become a better mother. I won't be perfect... but I'm going to do whatever it takes to keep you safe, and to keep you loved.