I did NOT have a miscarriage, and no not its not the same thing. I've had a few people say "sorry for your miscarriage" I'm in NO way shape or form trying be rude by any means.. But I gave birth to my child, he moved his fingers and toes and stuck is tongue out at me. He was moving when he came out. I did NOT have a miscarriage. I'm not saying my loss is greater than anyone else's but all I'm saying is I did not have a miscarriage.

I miss my son a lot and some days are so bad I can't get out of bed.. I can't function, I can't even speak, I can't sleep..I know it'll "get easier" but right now it's not. I can't help but be angry sometimes and confused. I just want my son back in my arms. I see him in my dreams, but what I would give to have him laying on my chest again. Like i said some days are harder than others and somedays are better than others. I'm numb.. I'm so hurt to the point of being numb.

Thank you to all the people who have put up with me and love me.This has been a bumpy road and I'm sure it's only going to get bumpier.

I love you Son! Always and forever