so I had posted awhile back about being super worried because I was 18 weeks and not feeling like any movement. I had an ultrasound last Tuesday found out were having another baby boy and everything is perfectly fine. We are both healthy. and now here I am at a little over 20wks and really feeling him moving around now. I cannot begin to explain the feeling I get its like feeling this all for the first time all over again. my first pregnancy was miserable was sick the ENTIRE pregnancy and delivered almost 2 months early and have been just as sick this time. I am just overly excited about everything all over again and I truly just couldn't feel more blessed. I have had a very terrible rough past as I have made some extremely bad choices and wound up somewhere I had never fathomed I'd be. recovering herein addict 3 years clean July 2016 makes 4. being a mother has just finally given me a purpose. looking into my son's eyes just makes me realize how much more I never want to go back to that nasty negative place ever again. I feel like I was rewarded for staying true to my word with God and here we are again after.thinking I wasn't going to get pregnant ever again due to cervical cancer here I am 20 weeks a long and things are going pretty good. ugh I'm so happy at this point in my life and I've never been able to actually say that and really mean it. We've got struggles and financially things are completely messed up and terrible but we're pushing through and I know deep down that things will work themselves out but until then I've got so much to be thankful for right now here in this moment that things will get better in time.!!