lol I'm just that girl, I'm tired of being walked on by men so in gonna do what I need to protect myself

@sydnee I couldn't do that. I'm not the type to try and check phones, emails, facebook, etc. It would drive me crazy trying to do that lol. I didn't even know my baby father's phone code until we had been married for a year, and he told me - I never asked. But I know several women who do. When I finally got away from my baby father (soon to be ex-husband), I swore I would never go back. It's been over a year now since I've seen him, & I do not regret it! I miss the sex, but that's all I miss lol (that's how he got me hooked in the first place). My trust is so fucked up now, but I have a wonderful boyfriend now & I've been friends with him for 5 years before getting in a relationship with him. I know with him I'll never have any cheating type issues, he isn't that kind of person. He is older than me, 14 years, but that doesn't bother either of us. I'm hoping to someday have a baby with my current boyfriend, but until then, I'm totally satisfied with my sweet baby boy :)

yeah I never trusted him.....and to be honest I still don't fully I still check his phone his email his pictures and his face book and I pay close attention to how he acts. he hasn't cheated since September I told him that he needs to respect me I have don't nothing to u to deserve to be cheated on if u don't love me then we can go our separate ways again but I'm not taking u back the next time I don't have time for ur games I have needs and goals in my life that I will get met and I'm not waiting for u to get ur shit together. and he straightened up shortly after that and I haven't had a problem since

@sydnee no judgement being passed. I definitely wouldn't date a guy who I was a side chick of though. No trust on that type of level.

and I'm not judging anyone sorry if it sounded like it

@lovemyson_610, I really hated it after about 2 months he broke up with her went with me cheated on me I broke up with him then he was with that girl for 4 months and now he's back with me and he hasn't been cheating and I'm having his baby.... it's not worth being a side chick tho personally I want a guy to be with me 100% I know what I'm worth now and I'm not letting any male disrespect me like that again

@maybaby2016 thanks :)

😊 glad we could have the conversation in a civil manner. good luck on your journey ttc, sending baby dust your way.

@maybaby2016 @their.bomb.ass.mom thanks for your input ladies :) I'm not offended in the slightest. As strange as it may sound, I do try to be as considerate as I can be in the situation. I've given them baby clothes and a stroller and I've bought them some diapers. I know it doesn't make it any better, but it is what it is. And as I said, I'm not longer sleeping with him. We're strictly friends now.

I totally agree with you, a self respecting woman wouldn't allow themselves to be a side piece because you know that you are worthy of a true relationship and you wouldn't want any dog of a man who would be low enough to cheat. I have been on both sides of the spectrum, I've been the other girl (unknowingly at the time) and I've been the sucker that was cheated on. no matter how you try and justify it, if you know he is in a relationship good or bad, you are on the same level he is. when I found out about my husband cheating I was pregnant with our now 5 year old so I stuck it out with him for 3 years. I couldn't take it anymore and I began to have respect for myself and I divorced his ass. his world fell apart as I watched from the side lines for a year and a half. we're back together now and I still have to see the woman he cheated on me with regularly (his kids mom) we have rules as to how things go now. only I deal with her, he speaks to her in my presence and it takes everything I have not to kill that piece of trash. but I am strong enough and I deal for the kids sake. my husband has rules to follow everyday as he regains my trust. we are doing good and moving forward with our lives. his ex means nothing to him, she never did . he just liked the thrill of being able to cheat....so sleezy. but yea being a side chick is not any kind of achievement and so many girls get it twisted. it makes you look like trash in other people's eyes and you are no different than the man who cheats. after I found out years ago that I was the side piece (before I ever knew my husband) I had to suffer the loss of my reputation and everything. it's just a horrible situation to be in. @their.bomb.ass.mom @lovemyson_610

Honestly in my situation, I knew about the girl, I knew their relationship etc. He would have cheated on her with someone else regardless if it was me or not, but it wasn't my place to do that, knowingly intrude on someone's relationship. It's a self respect thing, and I didn't respect myself enough not to do that to the other girl or myself at the time. I'm not sure of she ever cheated on him, but it doesn't matter of she did to me. If she did, she did, and that didn't make it okay for him to cheat either. I regret it because as a person, that made me look/feel awful. Of course in some people's eyes it was his fault, that he wanted the relationship, but it was my fault ad well for knowingly stepping in and causing probably even more issues. So I feel bad that I did that, if not for her, for myself. and I agree with @maybaby2016 also not putting you down of course, I've been through a similar situation. but I genuinely feel bad for it. Marriages may not be full of respect, by they should be.

@astridoll @maybaby2016 one thing I left out is that she has also cheated on him. she just told him that she's pregnant, but doesn't know which man is the father. It isn't something that I would do again, but it isn't something I feel bad for. Marriages are not always full of respect, I just have a few more months before my divorce is finalized. I'm married to my baby father & he was the worst relationship that I ever had. Full of abuse and cheating. I don't know that I will ever get married again, and I don't know if I will ever trust anybody again because of him. I didn't want anything serious, I guess that's why I didn't care if he had a gf or not. He is the one who contacted me and began this relationship. I have no type of feelings for him, other than a friend.

I think it should be more about you than others. I did it years ago too, and I feel so stupid when I remember that . I mean ... what kind of respect do you feel to yourself being a side chick.. is that what you want for your life? being the one he needs to hide? don't you prefer a marriage full of respect? (in which you're gonna have sex like crazy as well with your own man) . have a father for your children. . and who also cares for you. I mean being side chicks is waist time ! I don't care about their relationship, I care about myself, my body, my feelings, my mind. I won't be the 2nd plate of nobody . I worth much more. that's what I think. and I don't feel sorry for her, I feel sorry for him being a dumb ass thinking is cool cheating on the girl who loves him.. men like that don't deserve your body or your time. isn't it easier not to have a girlfriend you will hurt, if you want to fuck with 10 females more? be single ! fuck whoever you want but don't play with her feelings. that's why I think they're beyond retarded

the important thing is that since you are no longer sleeping with a taken man, you make sure you think about it really hard before you do something like that again. my husband cheated on me once and the woman knew we were married. I found out and we worked through our problems but I still want to harm her for her part in the affair. my husband and I have children and their stupidity hurt our family in so many ways. please, you wouldn't want it done to you so don't do it to someone else.

but you shouldn't feel inclined to ruin some poor unsuspecting girls relationship just because of your ex's bad choices. don't take this the wrong way, please. no judging here just kinda being straight forward with you . the girls relationship is screwed anyway because if not with you, then he'll cheat with someone else...because obviously he wants to but you owe it to yourself not to be the other girl. and in a way, you are partly to blame for the girlfriends sadness and unhappiness because you knowingly sleep with a man who is lying to her about his intentions. people commit suicide and murder over these types of things. there are so many men out there, why choose one who is low enough to cheat on his girlfriend???

there's this guy that I've been sleeping with for 4 months, (until I started dating my current boyfriend) and I knew the guy had a girlfriend. they live together, so her stuff was all over the house. Sometimes I feel bad about it. sometimes I'm just like fuck it, because my baby father cheated on me right in front of my face & I couldn't careless about the next persons relationship. the guy & I work together, and we still hang out - when his gf is at work. basically, I just wanted to make sure I wasn't the only one :) it's ended now, but I don't feel bad about it now. I swear, my baby father has totally ruined certain parts of my personality that were good 😕😕 @zensnow @maybaby2016 @their.bomb.ass.mom

I was a side chick, obviously I regret it now. But it's been years ago.

I was a side chick once but I didn't know about it until after the fling was over. I was ashamed and hurt at the same time.

me

@sydnee how did you feel about it? how did it end? did the other lady know about you?

me