Here's a new conundrum to add to my stress. I've been estranged from my father since I was about 13…
Here's a new conundrum to add to my stress. I've been estranged from my father since I was about 13 due to his alcoholism. His family is spread all over the country, from Vermont to California and I've never had much of a relationship with any of them. In the past couple of years, I've somewhat established contact with a few of them including my grandmother and two of his sisters. It's been nice hearing from them throughout my pregnancy, or it was until about two weeks ago when all three began pressing me about getting baby D baptized/christened. Why is this an issue? Because I'm Jewish, and they're Christians. This isn't an unknown fact to them, either. My mother is Jewish, and I was raised in a Jewish household, and they've known this my whole life... what they don't know is that I'm not exactly practicing right now, but that doesn't negate the fact that baptism is still not a religious tradition I follow. I don't want to lose contact with them again, but they keep bizarrely pressing the issue despite me telling them that will not be happening. How do I handle this??
Brittany Gabrielle·
Religion is such a touchy subject. - but I honestly feel like you can tip-toe around it. You will eventually have to tell them that you're not going to baptize your baby and your reasoning why. If you don't you may start getting annoyed with the subject being constantly pushed and pull away.
Leah·
В ожидании первенца
@bgabby, That's the confusing part... I already have, over telephone conversations and in letters i eventually wrote as I thought that may better convey my decision and rationale. And yet, they're still pressing this issue which makes me feel a bit disrespected. I'm quite the pacifist and avoid confrontation at all costs, but they seem to not be getting it.
Brittany Gabrielle·
Oh wow, in that case I'm at a loss. Because I kind of feel like they are totally ignoring your wishes. If you're not for confrontation, changing the subject is your next best option.
Lori 🍕·
@levleah, I honestly think if someone causes you that much trouble and does not understand ... Or want to understand then limiting contact with them is best .... I know it will suck because you just started talking to them not long ago , but maybe this is why it took this long - and maybe it's just not worth the pressure . It's disrespectful and it's not their child . Your decision though . Because I wouldn't put up with it .
Leah·
В ожидании первенца
@bgabby, you're right. That's what my mom said to do, as well...I've made my point/stated my position and can't do anything about their displeasure with it. I can only hope it doesn't cause another falling out with them.
Leah·
В ожидании первенца
@mrsmord, Yeah, it's just been so strange that they're so insistent despite having full knowledge of why I won't be baptizing her. It's probably best that I just skate over that topic when they bring it up, as it's truly not up for debate.
Leah·
В ожидании первенца
@mrsmord, @bgabby another irksome detail, when I explained why I won't be doing this to my aunt her response was "well you follow Reform Judaism anyway, so it shouldn't be that big of a deal."
Brittany Gabrielle·
lol, how rude. - you definitely may have to distance yourself or get accustomed to ignoring and changing the subject.
Leah·
В ожидании первенца
@bgabby, ha, I know... when she said that I was like... ummmm did she really just say that?! Looks like I'll just have to get better at changing the subject.
Brittany Gabrielle·
Yeah, the weather is always a neutral subject. Lol. @levleah
Leah·
В ожидании первенца
@bgabby, lol, good suggestion!